


Friends Without Benefits

by isaytheenay



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - High School, Eventual Smut, Jean/Logan is NOT the main ship, M/M, but it is present in this fic so be warned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-03
Updated: 2014-05-11
Packaged: 2017-12-31 09:40:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 80,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1030165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isaytheenay/pseuds/isaytheenay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Logan and Remy have been many things. They've been friends since middle school, and some would call their friendship idiotic and their compatibility virtually nonexistent. Despite it, they were always together, companions in their happiness, support in their struggles, advice-givers and idea-stealers. </p><p>Only twice were they lovers. Never once did it end well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> And behold, the NaNoWriMo fic. <3 
> 
> I've actually had this prompt of sorts sitting in my inbox for a long time. I've always intended to write it, but I never quite got around to it. So, here it is, in the process of being a chapter fic. <3

“She likes you.”

Logan looked over his shoulder at the tall girl down the hall, whose bright red face immediately was ducked behind the door of her locker. He furrowed his brows. “No she doesn’t,” he said, defiantly.

“Yo’ ‘bout as blind as a bat an’ denser dan metal.” Remy rolled his eyes, stepping around Logan and eyeing the girl pointedly. “She’s always so flustered aroun’ you and she’s always tossin’ her hair over her shoulder—”

“Well it’s pretty damn long, so that’s not surprising.”

Remy stared at Logan for a long time, seeming at a loss for words. “… Remy don’ know why he even bot’ers wit’ you. Even if you two did start goin’ out, you’d be de last person to know. Even if _you_ were de one to ask her out.”

“Y’know, does it occur to you that maybe I _don’t_ want a girlfriend?”

Remy blinked. “What, yo’ gay?”

“I—wha—no!” He said, a flush rising up his neck. “Remy, c’mon, be serious.”

“It’s a serious question. Are you gay?”

“I’m not even gonna dignify that with a response.” He slammed his locker closed and turned on his heel, Remy quickly at his side. They had the same class together after all.

“’Kay, so yo’ not gay.” There was a moment of silence, Remy looking at Logan for a long time, as if waiting for him to refute him.

He growled and rolled his eyes. “I’m not gay!”

“Okay, okay, sheesh,” he raised his hands in defense. “Righ’, so yo’ not gay. So, what don’ you like abou’ her? She’s pretty, she’s smart, she somehow tolerates all yo’ bullshit.”

Logan scoffed. “I thought you were my friend.”

“Apparently dis friend’s gotta give de village idiot some tough love if he wants to get laid.”

“I don’t want to ‘get laid’,” he said exhaustedly. “Shocking as it is, I wouldn’t mind an honest relationship with someone. Y’know, getting to know them, being compatible, falling in love, all that shit.”

“Really?” Remy seemed surprised. “Don’ find dat often among de members o’ de football team.”

“Is there a chance you could talk to me and _not_ sound so condescending?”

“Nah,” Remy said with an idle shrug. “Helps give you some perspective into Remy’s opinions about you an’ yo’ choices.”

“Oh, so what, you think I’m being stupid about this? You think I should take a girl out, screw her later that night and never call her again? Be _just_ like the rest of the football team?”

“Non, see I’m _approvin’_ o’ yo’ choices.” He said slowly, making sure Logan got every word.

“Then what was with the sittin’ on your high horse back there?! You talk to me like that when I do anything from trying to be a decent guy and date a girl to tryin’ to paint for the first time. Why’ve you gotta be like that all the time?!”

“Because dere’s a difference between bein’ helpful an’ bein’ downright stupid.”

Logan rolled his eyes and shoved Remy’s shoulder, making him trip a little. Despite it, Remy was grinning, and it wasn’t long until Logan returned it. They walked into class together, Logan’s mind now stuck on the girl with bright red hair who sat across the room, taking notes diligently. Occasionally, she looked up and spared a glance or two towards Logan, right when he happened to be looking back.

\----------

Remy was sat outside the school, waiting for Logan almost obediently, his legs kicking back and forth. He always got out of his last class early, and he liked the short time he got to himself. Just the open sky and his thoughts. Nothing could be better.

The final bell rang and students came pouring out of the front doors. Remy sat up and watched for Logan, smiling when he saw his hunched over form walk out front, backpack slung over one shoulder and his expression one of pure loathing. Remy smiled almost sweetly at him, patting the seat beside him, laughing to himself when he landed heavily on the bench and leaned back, sighing heavily.

“Thank god that shit’s over,” he groaned, rubbing his face tiredly.

“Jus’ t’ink, only t’ree hours o’ football practice, an’ den you can go home and do yo’ homework.” He snickered at the glare sent his way.

“Friends are supposed to support you. Why the hell do I keep you around again?”

“Because yo’ life would be significantly mo’ boring if you didn’ have dis Cajun around.” Logan cursed to himself. Goddamn if he was right. He looked out at the students leaving to get into their cars, his eyes catching the familiar girl from his class, stepping into her green car with a couple friends. He hadn’t really considered being in some sort of relationship with someone, especially someone like Jean Grey. Remy had been right though: she was smart, funny, and she was very attractive. It seemed she had some interest in him too, and Logan didn’t really mind the attention as much as he thought he would. To most, it was strange she was still single, but it didn’t surprise Logan. She’d had an ongoing on-and-off relationship with Scott Summers for at least the last three years. Even though they were currently “broken up”, it was more like Jean left Scott, and Scott was still under the impression that he was still with her.

Beside him, Remy had been chatting animatedly about something that had happened to him, but Logan paid him little mind. Jean was laughing about something her friend had said, which made Logan smile to himself. He wondered if he could make her laugh like that. Make her happy, make her enjoy herself like that…

“… an’ so dis idiot t’inks it’s hilarious to make fun ‘o his eyes an’ his old clot’es and t’row his cards all over de place, an’ so Remy did dat t’ing he’s been workin’ on, y’know, t’rowin’ de card, an’ it worked! Ran like a fuckin’ wimp back to his gang o’ babies, an—‘ey, are you even listenin’?” Remy reached over and cuffed the back of Logan’s head, earning himself a loud curse.

“Hey! What the hell was that for?!”

“Remy’s tellin’ an excitin’ story an’ you ain’ listening to a goddamn word he’s saying, dat’s what.” Remy folded his arms. Logan looked out to the parking spot where Jean was – but it now lay vacated, the green car apparently long gone. He sighed and turned back to Remy.

“You did something that nearly got you suspended again and made snide remarks about a guy who was twice your size but only had a quarter of your ego.” Logan stood and adjusted the strap of his backpack on his shoulder. “I’ve got practice. You comin’ along?”

“Dere ever a time Remy don’ come along?” He punched Logan’s shoulder playfully, following him as they walked back inside the school. “Gotta be yo’ cheerleader, dance on de sidelines as you beat up people on de field. Y’know,” Remy added, suddenly getting an idea, “Halloween ain’ far off; maybe he could get one o’ dose costumes an’ wear it to yo’ practice, with pom poms an’ all!”

“If you do, I’ll kill you. I’ll stab you with the fucking football.”

“Don’ t’ink dat’s possible—”

“I’ll _make_ it possible.”

“An’ here Remy was, being all _supportive,_ ” he said with emphasis.

“Not that kind of supportive, Rem.”

“So yo’ sayin’ Remy’s gotta be all helpful an’ kind when it comes to yo’ everyday life, but de moment he mentions pom poms, you gon’ get all huffy about it.”

“Like you said,” Logan said, stopping in front of the locker room door, “there’s a difference between being helpful, and being downright stupid.” He smiled and walked inside, leaving Remy in the hallway, a wide grin on his face.

\----------

There was a certain kind of happiness Remy got when he watched Logan play football. He loved nothing more than watching him be that ‘beast’ people referred to him as on the field. He was a hell of a full back, probably one of the best Remy had seen. Granted, Remy rarely watched football games to begin with, but he watched every single one of Logan’s games and practices, and kept tabs on the New Orleans Saints from time to time.

Currently he was sat on the bleachers that overlooked the practice, one leg propped up on the bleacher below to support the book he was taking notes out of. He hunched over and wrote furiously, willing himself to get the homework done as soon as possible. Besides, the more homework he got done was all the more time he could spend with Logan.

He smiled to himself at the thought and wrote out the next question, flipping through a few pages to find the answer. It was only the whistle that caught his attention a few minutes later, making him look up as the guys took a five minute break. Logan pulled his helmet off and ran a hand through his hair, making Remy grimace fondly at him, if it were even possible. He closed his textbook on his paper and set the book aside, taking the bleachers two at a time and coming up to the fence, folding his arms on it and grinning when Logan came over, breathless and decently sweaty.

“Workin’ off dat shit you ate at lunch, eh?” Remy asked making Logan laugh.

“I’m doin’ more in three hours than you’ve done in three years.”

“An’ yet Remy pulls off dis gorgeous figure,” he said, stepping back and gesturing to himself. Logan rolled his eyes and took a long drink of his water, looking back out to the field. Remy took a moment to admire his appearance, his skin shining from a thin layer of sweat, his hair messy and damp with it as well. With the way his head was turned, it featured his jaw and neck beautifully, and it took a moment for Remy to realize that he was staring too long. Logan looked back at him right then, the hazel color of his eyes standing out more than usual. Remy smiled without thinking about it, making Logan give him the all-too-classic “what the hell is wrong with you” look.

“Now,” Remy said, reached out and punching Logan’s shoulder, ignoring the dull thud against his knuckles from the pads he hit, “go work yo’ ass off s’mo’. Remy’s gon’ go be a good student an’ do his homework.”

“Go on, nerd,” he said with a grin, running his hand through his hair again with a deep breath. Remy winced at that, though this time, Logan caught it. “What?”

“Dat’s just…” Remy narrowed his eyes, shaking his head in disapproval.

“What, never sweat before? Though, I think you’re too prissy to sweat.” Logan said with a shrug.

Remy scoffed. “Remy jus’ don’ run his hands all t’rough it. It’s disgustin’.”

“What, this?” And without warning, Logan dropped his water bottle and grabbed Remy’s jacket, tugging him right against the fence and using his free hand to drag it through his own sweaty hair, and then reached out to ruffle it right into Remy’s.  He yelped loudly and pulled back as hard as he could, shaking his head and leaning as far away from Logan as possible, cursing loudly in French. Logan let go when the whistle blew, and Remy stood there for a moment, mouth agape and his eyes wide.

“Y-you _connard!”_ Remy narrowed his eyes to as much of a glare as he could possibly muster, still not moving from where he was stood.

“Oh grow some balls, Rem.” He bent down and grabbed his water bottle, jogging over to his bag and grabbing his helmet. His wide grin only made Remy shudder in revulsion. Slowly, as to not move too much, Remy slowly walked back up the bleachers, only brushing his hair aside carefully with the sleeve of his jacket.

Logan watched Remy before putting on his helmet, deeply enjoying watching Remy look entirely uncomfortable as he walked up the stands again. As soon as he was sat back down, Logan gave a cheerful wave. Remy flipped him off and turned away stubbornly.

Remy managed to get his work done by the end of practice, his hair still messy and gross-feeling when Logan threw his bag over his shoulder and headed back to the locker rooms. Remy met him out by the parking lot as always, arms folded defiantly and his expression still unchanged: a firm glare, a slight pout on his lips, and a posture that read, “if you pull one more stunt like that, you’ll lose something you’ll miss dearly”.

“Still upset?” Logan asked in a sing-song voice, throwing an arm around Remy’s shoulders and turning him towards his truck. Remy trudged along without answering him, his gaze set straight ahead. “C’mon, don’t get like that on me. You can shower when we get back. But I call dibs.”

“Good. You smell like a dog dat rolled in its shit,” Remy muttered, giving him a scrutinizing once-over.

“Harsh.” Logan let go when they got to his truck, and he unlocked the doors and threw his duffle bag and backpack in the bed. Remy stepped in and sank low in his seat, not bothering with the seatbelt. Logan started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot, driving them back. Halfway there, he asked, “So we’re gonna drive together to the game Friday night, right?”

“Ain’ dat always de plan?” Remy asked, raising an eyebrow in his direction.

“Just makin’ sure. It’s away, so we’re gonna have to leave early.”

Remy shrugged, looking forward again. Not like he had much else to do. His entire schedule revolved around Logan’s, so whatever his plans were usually became Remy’s as well. Not that he was complaining; he wouldn’t rather spend the time with anyone else, because no one else was like Logan. And despite how gruff, bitchy, and stubborn he normally was, Remy couldn’t imagine himself being with anyone else.

The thought struck him suddenly, and he couldn’t help looking over at Logan again. Logan was, in essence, all he had. He had other friends (a very, _very_ select few), but Logan was something else entirely. There was no one else he spent all his time with, there was no one else he always thought about and wondered about, and there was no one else Remy respected and admired more than him (though he’d be damned before he ever admitted it). It made a shiver shoot down his spine, wondering just _how_ important Logan was. The answer was simple yet complex at the same: pretty damn important.

They pulled up to Logan’s place and stepped out, walking inside the empty house and turning on the lights to bring some life back to it. Logan had lived alone ever since he was fourteen, inheriting the house from his father and mother after they died tragically in an accident. It wasn’t something Logan talked about often, and Remy didn’t blame him; after all, coming from a home where he had no parents around to begin with, it was hard to conceive what it would be like to lose your entire family at such a crucial age. Logan did have a half-brother, but he’d been basically absent from Logan’s life at a very young age. He hadn’t even attended the funeral for his parents.

Remy himself was an only child, passed from foster home to foster home, giving him hardly any roots or good role models to look up to. He’d taken up a reputation of being withdrawn and rarely in the house, becoming a bit of a pickpocket when he was around five or six. No foster parent seemed to care unless he was caught, and Remy didn’t forget the hard punishments he’d received. It only convinced him not to get caught, and now he could steal just about anything. Only when he’d met Ororo did he make changes in his life. He moved in when he was twelve, hardly optimistic and rather cold towards her when they first met. However, she saw something in Remy, something no one else seemed to take the time to even look at. She saw a good person underneath the exterior, and she worked her hardest to bring that out, make him the person he was today. He didn’t steal as often anymore, and he was generally liked around the school (mostly for being a prankster, but people did appreciate Remy’s intelligence and his wit when he’d honestly apply himself). Remy always considered Ororo a sort of simultaneous mother-sister figure ever since, something he appreciated more than she would ever hope to realize.

Logan opened the fridge and pulled out a can of Coke for the two of them, tossing one to Remy before he went down the hall to the bathroom. The shower was started up and Remy walked over to the living room and turned on the TV, flopping carelessly on the couch and opening his drink, his mind numbing at the images on the screen. As long as it kept his mind off of his earlier thoughts. Those were just… random. That’s what they were. Just random, too-deep-for-their-own-good thoughts. Remy shook his head and propped his legs across the seat cushions, his legs crossed at the ankle on one arm rest while his shoulders rested against the opposite one.

Logan’s shower didn’t take longer than twenty or so minutes, but it was enough time for Remy to nod off here and there. Only the sound of the water being shut off caught Remy’s attention, making him wake up from his drowsy state. He yawned and looked down at his chest, both hands holding the can of soda in place. He lifted one hand and rubbed his eyes, setting the can on the coffee table beside him with the other and he looking over the arm of the couch. Down the hall, he could catch a glimpse of the door, which hadn’t opened yet. He sighed, slouching back into the couch cushions again, one leg hanging off the front. Logan needed to hurry up. His hair felt disgusting, to say the least, and the sooner he got out, the sooner he could wash his sweat out.

Logan padded into the living room perhaps five minutes later, watching the TV and standing beside the couch. As soon as he’d walked in, Remy had dared to look back at him, and instantly regretted it. He sank even lower into the cushions if it were possible, closing his eyes tightly and taking a deep breath. _Damnit._

Logan, his hair still wet, wore loose jeans and a fitted shirt, his feet bare against the hardwood floors and his posture slouched. He was toweling his hair dry, making his shirt ride up slightly and expose his hips and some of his lower abdomen. Remy had stared because he simply couldn’t help it, and when he’d finally sat down, Remy was already sitting up. He couldn’t let Logan see just how red his face was.  “Shower’s all yours,” Logan said, still drinking his Coke.

Remy didn’t look back at him, just grabbed his drink and avoided eye contact as much as he could. “Took you long enough,” he said, trying to be as normal as possible. It was more for himself, really.

“Hey, I worked my ass off. You don’t need much to get your “gorgeous figure”,” he said, even using his hands to gesture the air-quotes, “but I have to go to some more lengths to be this attractive.”

Remy wasn’t sure how to take his words, but he was blushing, _harder,_ so he quickly slipped into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. Leaning back against the door, he blew out a big breath. When the hell did everything Logan said mean so much to him?! He pulled off his coat and draped it on the counter, turning on the hot water as high as it would go and stripped down, grabbing himself a towel before stepping inside and leaning against the shower wall. He nearly sank to the floor letting the water wash over him and burn against his skin. It was a good burn though, one he needed right then. Even in times like this, he would take a cold shower. He _hated_ the cold.

Eventually he stepped away from the wall and grabbed some shampoo and poured it into his hand, massaging it into his hair (secretly enjoying the familiar scent). Once that was washed out, he did the same with the conditioner and body wash. One final rinse and he was clean, turning off the water and grabbing the towel. He dried himself off and grabbed his clothes, pulling everything on except the coat which he simply draped over his arm. He opened the door and went to Logan’s room, dropping the towel into the hamper and throwing his coat idly on his bed. When he walked into the living room, he told himself that things were fine, and things would work out. It was just a bad afternoon. Maybe his homework was stressing him out, maybe he was worried about Jubilee back home, maybe he needed a break. He figured, with Logan, that was exactly what he could get.

“Back from the ocean?” Logan grinned after a moment.

Remy stopped, staring down at him. “… What?”

“Because you… nevermind.” He waved him off, giving up. Remy couldn’t help smiling, knowing that sometimes, Logan tried just a little too hard. He stepped over Logan’s outstretched legs – which were resting on the coffee table – and sat down beside him.

“Can’ believe yo’ still watchin’ dis show.” Remy said after a moment. Logan shrugged.

“It’s not that bad, y’know.”

“Remy took a longer shower dan you an’ he was half asleep by de time you came back.”

“So, what, that means I’ve got a longer attention span than you?”

“Dat’s de only t’ing you’ve got dat’s longer dan Remy’s.”

Logan turned his head slowly to look at him, his eyes narrow and his expression disbelieving. “… _Really?_ ”

Remy grinned back at him, shrugging without an ounce of shame. “Don’ act so shocked, Logan.”

Logan opened his mouth to respond, though nothing came out, and Remy counted it as a solid victory and stood. “C’mon. Remy ain’ sittin’ around an’ listenin’ to dese cacklin’ hens on de TV any longer.” He snapped his fingers quickly. “Move yo’ ass, hop to it.”

Logan frowned and stood, though he looked utterly lost. “What the hell are you doing? Where are we going?”

“Yo’ room. You’ve got an Xbox gatherin’ dust an’ Remy’s feelin’ like shootin’ some people.”

“Are you turnin’ psychopathic on me? Maybe I shouldn’t let you play.” He stopped and turned around when they got to his room, blocking the entrance. He folded his arms with a smirk, knowing he effectively took up the entire doorway. “Y’know those crazy moms on the TV may be right; violent games make violent kids.”

“Oh, Remy apologizes, was he _not_ talkin’ to de full back o’ de school’s football team? De position dat requires de mos’ physical brutality out of all o’ de positions in de game?” He looked down at him, daring him to retort.

“That’s for a sport. What you’re sayin’ is shootin’ and killin’ people on a whim. That ain’t right, Rem. You’re goin’ nuts on me, aren’t ya?”

“Remy ain’ goin’ nuts, he’s jus’ got a severe urge to watch people die in a virtual world and be de cause of said death. Now move, befo’ Remy makes dat vision a reality wit’ you as de target.”

Logan raised his hands in surrender, laughing. “Yeah, yeah, sure. Like you could.”

“Please, don’ even t’ink fo’ a momen’ dat Remy don’ t’ink of killin’ you from time to time.” He pushed past him into his room, turning on the Xbox and getting settled on the edge of the bed. Logan hadn’t joined him yet, shaking his head in disbelief.

“I don’t think so. But maybe that’s not what matters.” He bent down and grabbed both controllers, handing one to Remy and starting the game. “Even if you _did_ want killing me, which I definitely _don’t_ think you would, you’d never be able to go through with it. You’d miss me too much.” He finally joined Remy on the bed, the title screen opening.

“Yo’ so confident in dat fact. Got any evidence to back yo’ statement?”

“Who else are you going to argue with that’s got the balls to bite back at you?”

Remy shrugged, thinking about it, the game starting. “Scott? T’ough, dat may be yo’ problem soon enough.”

Logan ignored that comment. Only if he got together with Jean would that happen. “Alright. What are you gonna do during the day and after school? Who’s gonna reply to your stupid texts about how much you want jambalaya every goddamn day and how you wish I didn’t have a job so you could play Xbox with someone?”

“Remy’s got Jubilee back at home. He’ll find somet’in’ to do. Take dat, by de way,” Remy added with a smirk, leaning back for a moment as he watched Logan’s character explode. As soon as he respawned, Remy was back in his ‘gaming position’; leaned over, eyes focused and his fingers moving almost inhumanly fast over the controller. “Got anyt’in’ else?”

“Well, what about Friday?”

He shrugged again, though he had a feeling Logan could – for once – be right. “What abou’ Friday?”

“Hello?” He paused the game, giving Remy a thoroughly unimpressed look. “Our tradition, you ass.”

“Oh, dat…”

“Yeah, _that._ ” He huffed, knowing he was doing this deliberately. “Every single Friday since I’ve joined the football team, you’ve come to every game with me. And every night after the game you come over and we order a pizza that you never pay for but you still manage to convince me to buy the largest size with almost all of the toppings and then take all of the leftovers home. But you don’t even leave, because you always end up staying over and crashing on my bed or my couch and take up all the damn blankets. _That_ tradition.”

Remy’s gaze was focused intently on the screen as he chewed on his lip for a moment. “Remy could… he could find somet’in’ to do…”

“Come on. No you can’t. Nothing beats Friday night, Rem. _Nothing.”_

Remy sighed and put his controller down, finally facing him. “Assumin’ dat yo’ right, and Remy could find not’in’ better to do, you still t’ink dat he’s gonna _miss_ you or somet’in’.” Remy rolled his eyes mockingly. “Remy deals wit’ quite a lot from you; maybe he’ll actually have some free time o’ somt’in’?”

“You’ll be bored out of your skull. Just admit it: you’ll miss me.”

“… Jus’ start de damn game.” Remy muttered, and Logan grinned, bumping his shoulder hard against Remy’s. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw him smiling.

\----------

By the time Friday had rolled around, the school was excited with the prospect of the game and spirit gear was worn all around. Remy, still an avid disbeliever in wearing certain colors of clothing just to show you supported a damn football team, didn’t partake. He never had, not once in all of their years of high school. Because he was a member of the team, Logan wore his jersey around all day, earning high fives from fellow team mates and shouts of ‘knock ‘em dead!’ and the like all day. Remy, at his side as always, sighed dramatically and leaned heavily against the lockers beside Logan’s when he stopped to grab his textbooks.

“All dis school spirit gets on Remy’s nerves,” he muttered.

Logan laughed, shaking his head. Remy was always in his worst mood at school on game days. “What, not a fan of the Wolverines?”

“We’ve been here how long an’ you _still_ ask dat question?” Remy scoffed and looked around. “Everyone wearin’ face paint and gettin’ all wrapped up in a damn game. Half o’ dese so-called fans ain’ even gonna show.”

“And I’ve told _you,_ it’s not about who shows, it’s the fact that they care. They’re putting in the effort to put on that face paint and wear the school colors for us. Just to show that they support us.”

“Still,” Remy said defiantly. “It’s stupid.”

Logan rolled his eyes and fished a few books out of his locker, stowing a few others away, when they both heard someone clear their throat. Logan looked up and Remy cast a look over his shoulder, blinking in surprise at who he saw.

Smiling softly, her eyes cast down, Jean bit her lip for a moment before forcing herself to meet Logan’s gaze. “Uh, I just wanted to say… good luck tonight.” She smiled at him, and Remy couldn’t help but feel a small pain in his stomach. He knew she was pretty – hell, the whole school did – but she was bordering on gorgeous right then.

“Oh, uh… thanks.” Logan smiled and Jean brushed her hair behind her ear, blushing a little.

“You’ll do well. I’ll see you at the game tonight, Logan.” She grinned and turned quickly, a few girls down the hall giggling and walking with her. Logan still hadn’t turned around. He couldn’t look away, not yet. It was just a good luck, just like anyone else’s, but… somehow, it meant more. He found himself smiling and watching her, her bright red hair still standing out amongst the crowd of students heading to class.

Then someone else cleared their throat behind him.

“Logan…?”

He groaned, closing his eyes with a grin.

With a voice at least two octaves higher than normal, Remy said, “Remy jus’ wanted to tell you dat, ah, he t’inks yo’ gonna be _great_ tonight…”

Logan turned around slowly and folded his arms, trying his best to appear unimpressed.

“… an’ Remy t’inks yo’ gonna be de best player out dere,” he daintily pushed some of his longer hair behind his ear, rocking on his feet a little, biting his lower lip as hard as he could to resist laughing. “A-an Remy wanted to tell you good luck, an’ dat he t’inks yo’ so hot an’ irresistable…”

“Put a sock in it, you ass…!” Logan laughed, shoving at Remy and closing his locker, hefting his bag over his shoulder. “Jesus Christ, I don’t even know why I hang out with you.”

Remy, who had finally given in and succumbed to laughter, jogged up beside him. “Oui, you do! Dere ain’ any humor ‘round wit’out dis Cajun, Logan.”

“That’s definitely up for debate. Besides, you make a terrible woman.”

“Doesn’ matter. You liked dat, didn’ you?”

Logan deadpanned. “Seriously? You were talking all weird and acting like a—”

He groaned. “Not Remy, you imbecile. Jean!”

“Oh… well, uh, what do you mean…?”

“You know, battin’ her lashes, bein’ all sweet and givin’ you that look?” Remy mimicked it as best as he could, even clasping his hands and pouting a little, but Logan rolled his eyes yet again.

“She was just wishing me good luck… that’s all. It’s not a big deal.”

“God, yo’ hopeless.” Remy stopped outside of Logan’s class, patting him almost sympathetically on his shoulder. “Maybe one o’ dese days yo’ll get laid.” He turned and left Logan standing outside of his class, frowning after him. It didn’t really seem like such a big deal… at least, that was what he was telling himself. He couldn’t really deny the strange feeling in his stomach when he looked in his class and saw Jean in one of the desks near the front row, smiling at him.

\----------

The ride to the game always eased Logan’s nerves. All day people were telling him how the team would crush their opponents, how they’d win without a sweat, how they knew Logan was going to be the best out there that night. Sometimes the pressure got to him after hearing all of these things for six hours straight. Everyone was expecting so much from him and the team. It was perhaps why rides with Remy were the best, because football was the last thing he ever wanted to talk about.

“Remy’s t’inkin’ we’ll get de large meatlover’s wit’ some green peppers on top an’ den breadsticks wit’ dat delivered when we get back. Dat’ll feed dat unending appetite you always have when we get back.” Remy grinned over at him, stowing away the old menu and putting it in the glove box of Logan’s truck.

“Breadsticks? Since when do we need breadsticks when pizza is almost the exact same thing?!”

“What, don’ like a little variety in yo’ life? Breadsticks don’ have sauce on dem, Logan, everyone knows dat.” Remy rolled his eyes dramatically. “You get de marinara on de _side_.”

“No breadsticks.”

Remy frowned, his shoulders slouching. “Logan…!”

“No.”

“Remy folded his arms, staring at him with a firm pout on his face. It took almost a minute before he sighed. “Fine. No breadsticks.”

“Thank you.”

“… but can we get hot wings instead?”

“No!”

“Sheesh, someone’s on deir time o’ de mont’.”

“Remy, for the love of god…”

“It’s completely natural, Logan. It happens to everyone.” He reached out a hand and rested it on his upper arm, squeezing comfortingly. “It jus’ means yo’ mo’ bitchy and mo’ of a pain in de ass dan usual, is all.” Remy snickered and let go, barely dodging the hand that threw an intended punch in his direction.

“I hate you sometimes.”

“Non, you love Remy.”

“And that’s your opinion.” Logan sighed softly when they got to the school where the game would take place, pulling in and parking. The bus for the rest of the team had already arrived and the players were walking out into locker rooms to change. It was really a surprise that Logan was still allowed to drive himself to the games, especially when the team was normally so strict on policy, but Logan told Remy once that the coach gave him a little leniency sometimes. Probably because he was one of the best players on the team. Nevertheless, even if he could drive separately to the away games, he still had to change and listen to the pre-game talk just like everyone else, and that would be starting soon. The game was starting in only half an hour. “Guess I’d better head out…”

“Well, Remy’ll be watchin’. Bored outta his mind, as usual.” He smiled when Logan laughed.

“Yeah, the one guy not standing and cheering when we get a touchdown or somethin’.” He turned off the truck and stepped out, grabbing his bag out of the back of the truck. Remy followed and rounded the vehicle, leaning against the front fender while Logan tossed him the keys, standing just a few feet away. Remy stowed the keys in his inside pocket safely. “I’ll be lookin’ for you.”

Remy couldn’t help feeling his heart flutter a little. He grinned warmly and gave a small mock salute. “You’ll see Remy, don’ you worry. Meet here after de game, as usual?”

 “Won’t find me anywhere else. Gotta get that damn pizza ordered so it’s ready by the time we get back,” he added bitterly.

Remy grinned even wider, nodding. “You know it. Remy wants dat t’ing on our doorstep an’ waitin’ fo’ us when we get back. Den you can pay an’ Remy’ll get it started while you shower and dress into normal clot’ing.”

“Right, and when I get back, the pizza’s gonna be half-eaten.” Logan said flatly.

“Dat is de tradition, ain’ it?” Remy asking teasingly.

“Apparently.” He took a step towards the locker room, and Remy stood up straight. “I’ll see you later.” He said, waving and walking backwards slowly.

 Remy felt an urge to walk after him, to give him a different sort of goodbye, but he pushed the thought aside and waved, folding his arms and leaning back against the car again. “Go kick deir asses!” Logan’s laugh was more than satisfying enough for an answer.

 


	2. Chapter 2

The game was anything but pretty, but the win was worth every bruise Logan earned. When the final whistle was blown and the clock ran out, everyone stood up and gave a loud cheer or a sigh of relief, glad that the battle was done. They won by just three points, making the score 21-24, which could’ve been better, but the team was happy enough with how they’d come out. Remy grinned as he watched Logan remove his helmet and share a number of high fives and hugs with his friends on the field. He skipped down the bleachers and leaned over the hand rails, watching Logan go back into the locker room. Remy blew a kiss in the most dramatic way possible, and Logan flipped him off and walked inside.

As Logan changed, Remy went to stand beside Logan’s truck, starting the engine for him so it’d be ready for when they left. He leaned against the front of the truck again, watching the players emerge at least ten minutes later, carrying their gear over their shoulder and walking back onto the bus. Logan was on his way out, and Remy was smiling already, but something immediately made it fade. Not just something, but some _one._

It was Jean. Of course she was here. She said she would be, didn’t she? A few of the guys on the bus whistled down at Logan and Jean as they stood together, and Logan scratched at the back of his head – the telltale sign of embarrassment. Already, Remy could imagine him blushing, apologizing for the way the guys were acting, something sweet and endearing and damn near impossible not to love. Remy looked down at his shoes, trying to block it out, ignoring the weird pressure knot he felt in his stomach. He was happy for Logan. He was meeting someone, getting to know them, someone who was very much interested in him and was genuinely nice and caring and would take care of Logan. But… Remy was taking care of Logan. They’d taken care of each other since seventh grade. Why did things have to change now?

They’d talked for nearly ten minutes before Remy heard Logan’s footsteps and looked up, smiling at him. Of course, it wasn’t at its usual strength; the smile Logan bore was nothing less than one that was half in a dream. “Hey,” he said, walking by and tossing his bag into the bed of his truck.

“Hey.” Remy shook his head, knowing that Logan wouldn’t miss the odd tone of his voice. He never did, not once. In the back of his mind, Remy almost hoped that Logan would say something…

Logan stopped and frowned, not stepping inside the truck yet. Remy didn’t sound right, didn’t sound himself… “Something wrong?”

He managed a small smile at that, looking up and grinning at Logan. “Non, everyt’in’s good.” He smacked the hood of the truck and jumped into the passenger seat of the car, slouching low in the seat. Logan didn’t press the matter, and his smile was back not a few seconds later. Remy looked back out towards where the locker rooms, Jean walking away slowly. A part of him wished she’d just… vanish.

And speaking of Jean yet again… Remy looked over at Logan, knowing it was rather unavoidable. It was the elephant in the room. Remy knew Logan wanted to talk about it at least a _little_ , whether he knew it or not. “So, saw you an’ Jean talkin’ back dere.” Logan’s cheeks had flushed a little bit.

“Uh, yeah, we talked for a little…” He turned on the ignition and shifted the gears in the truck, distracting himself and looking over his shoulder as if he was looking for traffic. Of course, it was to avoid letting Remy see just how red he was.

“So, you goin’ out yet?”

“What?!” Logan looked back at him, then immediately regretted it. Remy was wearing that stupid grin, one he was sure meant that he was teasing him into giving him answers. “Y’know, that ain’t any of your business.”

“Remy’s yo best friend an’ he can’ even know de intimate details o’ yo’ love life? Harsh, Logan, very harsh…” he sighed, shrugging a little.

“She just… told me that I did well. She was happy that we won and she enjoyed the game. That’s it.”

“Sure it is. You said all dat in ten seconds, but dat conversation went on fo’ a long time, mon ami.”

Logan shrugged and Remy rolled his eyes. “Well, you eit’er tell Remy what happened o’ you get to orderin’ dat pizza. You know dose idiots at de pizza place can’ ever understand Remy’s accent.”

Logan withdrew his phone from his pocket, dialing for a moment before stopping. They’d pulled out on the road by now, but Logan hesitated in calling. He wanted to talk about Jean. Hell, it was _all_ he wanted to talk about right then. The game being won didn’t even matter to Logan right then. “It was just nice talkin’ to her, y’know? She asked me how I was and asked how long I’d been interested in football. And y’know, I told her and all that and she asked if I was going to college, too. And you know I’ve never really thought about it because I don’t have enough money for tuition, but… she said that there are scholarships. She thinks I could do it.”

Remy looked over at Logan, suddenly feeling a wave of concern. “Like… what kind o’ schools…?”

“Universities, like the big state school in the city, or even out of state ones too. Whoever wants me and is willing to let me in for free.”

“Wait, wait.” Remy suddenly sat up. Now his heart was racing, and rather unpleasantly. “Yo’ leavin’ de state?! All because Jean fuckin’ Grey told you to!?”

“Woah, no! Jesus, Remy, calm down!” He sent a look in his direction, concern mixed with disbelief. “Dude, chill out. It’s not like I’m applying tonight or even next week. I still don’t even know.”

Remy took a deep breath, settling in his seat again. “Don’ go outta state, Logan. Jus’ don’.”

“See?” Logan grinned, and Remy looked over, confused. “You _would_ miss me. Can’t even bear the thought of me bein’ in another state.”

Remy snorted, hiding a smile behind it. “’Ey, Remy’s jus’ lookin’ out fo’ you. Who else is gon’ give you de relationship advice you apparently need? You can’ even function wit’out him hangin’ by yo’ side.”

“Hey, I managed just fine without your help tonight.”

“Yeah?” Remy raised an eyebrow. “Do go on.”

“Okay, well… after we talked about college for a bit, she just asked me some other things… like what I might want to do for a career or something. I asked her the same, and she was talking about medical school, being a nurse… she said it’d take a lot, but her parents are all for it. They support her and want to pay for her tuition to help her achieve her dreams… the conversation kinda died there…”

It was tempting to smile to himself, but Remy only nodded solemnly. It was no time to be selfish. “Well, uh… it sounds like you two had a good conversation, till den.”

“Yeah… but it wasn’t hard, it wasn’t forced. She didn’t say she was sorry.”

“… Wait, what?”

Logan looked over at him, frowning. “What do you mean?”

“She didn’t say sorry to what?”

“… When I told her about my parents.”

Remy stared at him for at least half a minute, his eyes wide. Logan didn’t tell _anyone_ about his parents (even though the entire school knew about it). He never brought it up in conversation, and he sure as hell didn’t tell it to flirty red heads who were all batting eyelashes and no… well, whatever. Jean didn’t deserve to know. She couldn’t possibly have become so close to Logan so quickly. That was just pushing it.

“… Hello?”

“O-Oh, uh… right. Desole, Remy was… lost fo’ a moment.”

“Yeah, you’ve been like that a lot tonight…” Logan gave him a once-over. “You sure you’re alright…?”

“Oui. Remy’s fine.” There was a pause, a short silence, and Remy cleared his throat. “You orderin’ dat pizza? Remy’s stomach ‘bout to eat him from de inside out.”

Logan found it within himself to laugh a little, dialing the rest of the number and calling the pizza place to give the order. He still couldn’t help feeling a bit worried when he looked over at Remy. His gaze was cast towards the window, his posture was low and his hands were kept to himself. Most importantly, he wasn’t even talking. That was always the tell-tale sign that something was wrong.

He finished the order, gave the address, and was given an estimate for when the food would arrive. He smiled and put the phone away, glancing towards Remy again. “It’ll be there by the time I’m out of the shower, I think. I’ll leave cash by the door just in case it gets there earlier.”

Remy was brought out of his thoughts and nodded in acknowledgment. “Sounds good.”

Logan frowned. “So. Uh… what did you want to so tonight?”

Remy shrugged half-heartedly. “It’s up to you. Remy don’ mind.”

Logan felt his irritation spike a little. “How about a movie?”

He nodded. “Sure, Remy could go fo’ dat.”

“Any in mind?” He prompted.

He thought for a moment. “Non, not off de top o’ Remy’s head—”

“Okay, that’s it…” Logan pulled off to the side of the road, making Remy look around in alarm. Before he could even ask, Logan put on his truck’s flashers and parked, turning to Remy. “Something’s wrong. Tell me right now or I swear to god I’m going to pull you out of your seat with my bare hands and then tear the headrest off so I can beat you with it or something.”

Remy blinked, stunned. “Sheesh. Dose are extreme measures dere, Logan. An’ you said Remy was de one turnin’ into a psychopat’.”

“I’m being completely serious Remy, you’re driving me _nuts_. You aren’t sayin’ a goddamn thing and you’re acting all strange and quiet, and that’s not _normal_ for you.”

“Nobody ever said Remy was normal, Logan.” Remy said sharply, and immediately, Logan looked away. He sighed and leaned his head back against the window. He knew Remy wasn’t really keen on the word ‘normal’: it was the last thing he’d ever been. He had a hunch his parents never wanted him from the start, just because he was born with his strange, mismatched eyes. He told Logan that in New Orleans, guys in the gangs would call him Le Diable Blanc, or The White Devil. He’d been told that he was somehow involved in some sort of prophecy, something his parents probably wanted no part of. Remy was convinced that he was cursed for it. All for his eyes. He could never change them either, not permanently. A part of Logan wished that he didn’t want to; it was a quality he honestly liked a lot in Remy, something that made him stand out from the crowd. But that wasn’t the kind of attention that Remy ever wanted. 

“Forget I said that. It was… it was stupid.” He said finally, lowering his gaze now. There was another few seconds of silence, and finally Logan lifted his gaze, meeting Remy’s. “I don’t know how to help you right now. Most times I know what’s wrong, and I know what to do, but I can’t figure it out right now. So just… tell me what to do. I’ll do it. Whatever it is, I’ll do it.”

Remy’s expression shifted just slightly, in such a way that he was sure anyone else would completely miss the change in his eyes or the way the corner of his mouth twitched a little. He waited, patient for once in his life, giving Remy the time he needed to figure out what he wanted. But really, if only he knew.

Logan didn’t – and he certainly couldn’t, Remy told himself – know what it was that would make Remy’s worries fade. He couldn’t have Logan tell him he’d stop telling Jean only the things he told Remy. He couldn’t have Logan promise that he wasn’t going to leave for university, and he wasn’t going to leave for Jean. He couldn’t make Logan say that things weren’t even going to change between them, because they already _were_ , and he couldn’t stop it. Logan wasn’t going to lean across the seats and kiss him, tell him it would be alright, that things were fine and they were fine. Logan wasn’t ever going to do that. Not in this lifetime, Remy was sure.

“Y’know,” Remy started, his words slow and his eyes moving between Logan’s hands, his lips, the steering wheel and the gloves he wore on his own hands. “Let’s jus’ go home, put in some ol’ movie you’ve got sittin’ in yo’ room, an’ eat pizza. Somet’in’ classic, an’ maybe somet’in’ funny, too.” He lifted his eyes, meeting Logan’s. “Dat’s what I need righ’ now.” 

Logan caught it instantly. He nodded, offering a smile, as warm and meaningful as he could manage. “Anythin’ you want, Rem.” He turned off the flashers and put the truck into drive again, pulling onto the road and heading back home again.

When they got there, a man in a delivery car had just pulled up. Logan paid for everything: the pizza, the breadsticks, and even the hot wings.

\----------

Remy’s odd behavior seemed to vanish by the next morning. He woke up and was once again his usual, cocky self, mocking Logan’s breakfast-making skills, yet sitting back and folding his arms when Logan told him to make it himself if he was so damn good at it. Things were fine, nothing was tense, and Logan was beyond relieved. As much as he wanted to know _why_ he was so bothered after the game last night, Logan would rather not bring it up again. Remy didn’t really like living in the past anyways, and now that everything seemed to be alright, why worry about it?

Now eating their meal, Remy ate his pancakes full-heartedly and Logan hoarded almost every piece of bacon he’d cooked. “Y’know,” Logan started, taking a drink of his orange juice before leaning back in his chair, “I can’t even believe you look the way you do.”

Remy frowned, in the middle of swallowing his pancake. He raised an eyebrow slowly and asked, mouth half-full, “W’a’s dat s’posed t’ mean?”

“It means how the hell can you eat half of a large pizza, six hot wings, four breadsticks, and _still_ be this hungry? And then not gain a single pound after all that?”

Remy shrugged, now grinning amusedly. “I’s in de genes, Logan.” He took another large bite of his pancake, just for emphasis.

“You’ve gotta have the fastest metabolism on the face of the planet…”

“Remy’s de envy o’ every girl in school.”

Logan snickered and continued eating, and was soon done afterwards. He washed his plate and started cleaning up around the kitchen, letting Remy finish before he pulled out whatever leftovers they had out of the fridge and stored them in containers. As soon as he was done, Remy pushed his plate in Logan’s direction, his glass joining soon after. Logan stared at them, then back at Remy. He was merely met with a grin. Sighing dramatically, he took the plate and washed that one too.

“A labor o’ love, mon ami, don’ you fo’get it.” Remy said, pushing out of his chair and stretching up. “Remy’ll admit it t’ough; dat was a mighty fine meal.”

Over the sink, Logan smiled. “Wow, a compliment? Don’t get those very often…”

“An’ don’ get used to dem.” He looked at the clock: only nine in the morning. “Well, Remy gon’ take mo’ advantage o’ yo’ hospitality and use yo’ shower.”

“Knock yourself out.” Logan said over his shoulder, but Remy was already walking in the door, whether he agreed to it or not.

In the bathroom, Remy removed his shirt and looked down at it, grimacing a little. It had a few spots on it, nothing too bad, but still… he’d rather not wear it again. He thought for a moment and smirked, slipping out of the bathroom and sneaking across the hall towards Logan’s room. Opening the drawer he knew contained all of Logan’s shirts, he snagged the first one he found and went back into the bathroom, starting his shower. He vouched for a quick one this time, only taking about ten or fifteen minutes before stepping out, drying off, and pulling on his dark jeans with the soft green shirt. It hung a bit on his frame, around his chest and down his arms, but it was warm and comfortable, and that was all he needed. Toweling his hair, he stepped out of the bathroom and threw the towel and his shirt in Logan’s laundry, noticing it was getting a little full now. Not to mention, full of used shirts and jerseys. Oh, the life of a football player.

“Logan,” Remy called, still looking down at the laundry.

“What?” He called back, drying some dishes.

“Please, if you’d be so kind, join Remy fo’ a moment.” He heard a groan from down the hall and smirked, waiting until they were both looking down at the laundry. Logan was silent for a long time, unsure what was so unique about the hamper.

“… What?”

“Look at it.”

He did.

“I don’t underst—”

“Ain’ it beautiful?”

“Beautiful?”

“Beautiful. Magnifique.”

“… Sure….”

“An’, very full.”

Logan groaned yet again. “It can _wait,_ Remy.”

“Y’know, Remy refrained from sayin’ anyt’in’, but eventually dis football gear o’ yo’s is gon’ stink up yo’ whole house. Do you really want dat?”

“I’ll get an air freshener.”

“Non. You gon’ do laundry.”

He whined. “I’ll do it later.”

“You’ll do it _now._ ” He turned and stared him down, eyes narrowed and his arms folded. He wasn’t going to back down on this one, that much Logan knew. When it came to Remy and keeping things neat and tidy, well… that was where he and Logan never saw eye to eye.

“… _Fine,_ fine, I’ll do it now.”

“Damn right you will.” He turned on his heel and headed towards the living room again, but Logan stopped him.

“… Is that my shirt?”

“Non. It’s Remy’s. It jus’ happens to be in yo’ size an’ happened to come from yo’ drawer. So _clearly_ , it’s Remy’s.” He gave him one last look before flopping on the couch, ignoring how Logan rolled his eyes and picked up the laundry hamper to drag down to hall to the laundry room. Remy listened as Logan muttered curses under his breath and pushed some buttons, apparently spilling the detergent or pouring it in the wrong place because he suddenly heard Logan shout “shit!” and drop something before starting the washer. He snickered to himself and could clearly see Logan in his mind, fumbling around the washer despite having used it on his own for at least five years or so by now. As soon as he was back in the room, he sat back on the couch beside Remy heavily, looking at him pointedly.

“Happy?”

He shrugged. “Eh.”

He growled under his breath. “Of course.”

“So, Monsieur Sunshine, what’s de plan fo’ today? Video games, movies, lunch?”

“What th—lunch?! You just had breakfast!”

Remy shrugged, as if helpless. “Remy’s got a large appetite, mon ami.”

“Well, no lunch.”

“Just like no hot wings an’ no breadsticks?”

Logan ignored him. “It’s beside the point. I’ve got to work today.”

Remy felt his heart sink. “When?”

“Hour and a half.”

“Oh…” Remy sighed softly and sank a little in the couch. “How long?”

“About seven hours. They’ve got me working longer shifts on the weekend since they know I’ve got time and it won’t conflict with football.”

“’Ey, you ain’ got time. Weekends are solely Remy-Time.”

“Well, aside from Remy-Time being about every day of the week, I think you can handle me being busy for two of those days.”

Remy frowned and drew his legs up, resting his chin on his folded arms. “Easy fo’ you to say.”

“Look, how about later tonight when I get off work we do something. We could… I dunno, see a new movie or go get some food. Find somethin’ to do. We always do eventually, even if we sit in the truck for an hour thinking about it.”

Remy laughed softly. “S’pose dat could work.”

“Good. Now c’mon, I’ve gotta get you back and I need to shower too. And hopefully by the time I get back, I’ll have some more hot water ready.” He smirked, nudging Remy’s shoulder teasingly before standing up. Remy laughed a little and followed after him, grabbing his coat and pulling it on. Remy was almost tempted to tell Logan to not bother showering; he liked the half-asleep look on him, with his hair sticking up in odd places while his posture still seemed a little slumped over. It was honestly the most endearing thing he’d ever seen. But he couldn’t say that; it just wasn’t his place. Not anymore.

They got in the truck and drove back to where Remy lived, stopping out front. They sat in there for a little while longer, Remy initially refusing to go and Logan not moving until he got out, very much used to his stubbornness. “Six-thirty. I’ll pick you up.”

Remy laughed, making Logan give him an odd look. “You gon’ dress nice fo’ Remy?” he asked when he finally relented, stepping out of the truck, but not shutting the door yet.

“What? Why?” Logan gave him an almost suspicious look, not sure where he was going with it.

“Well, you pickin’ Remy up at dinnertime, gon’ go see a movie, maybe get some food…” Logan laughed and rested his forehead on the steering wheel, realizing Remy’s point.

“Don’t even sa—”    

“It’s a date, Logan.” And with that, he shut the door, waving in an almost girlish manner, and sending a wink his way. Logan just shook his head and drove off, leaving Remy to walk inside. Before he even got there, someone had opened the door.

“Look who finally came back!”

Remy laughed, knowing exactly who it was without even needing to look. It was Jubilee, or better known as his “little sister that he had no knowledge of adopting until she said so”. She was only a few years younger than him, just around fifteen, and was probably the one other close friend he had in this neighborhood. Ever since he’d moved in with Ororo, she had been quite a troublemaker in her school. Remy, by some miracle, somehow managed to set her straight. She wasn’t perfect – she had quite a mouth on her and would voice her opinions no matter what – but it was a huge improvement. Truth be told, he loved the idea of having Jubilee has his sibling, of sorts. He’d never had a true family to start with, but with the liking Jubilee took to him so quickly, he knew he would always keep her close.

He stood with his hands on his hips, looking down at Jubilee as she glared up at him. She wasn’t very short for her age, but Remy was – as Logan once put it – “abnormally and freakishly tall”. Remy refuted that he had height-envy. “Indeed, Remy has returned once mo’. No need to worry now, petite.”

“I wasn’t worried!” She said defiantly, arms crossing over her chest. “I can take care of myself!”

“Sure you can, petite, sure you can.” She finally stepped aside with a huff and let Remy, in, who took off his shoes by the door and went straight for his room. Jubilee followed him and watched him for a moment as he hung up his coat in his small closet. “That’s not your shirt.”

Remy felt his face heat up a little, but he tried his best to brush it off, fumbling around the closet for longer than necessary. “So? Maybe Remy bought a new one.”

“Well if you did, you bought a stupid shirt. It’s so big on you!” She stepped forward and tugged on it a little, making Remy turn around and push her away.

“’Ey! Hands off, Jubes!”

“What? It’s just a shirt.” She did as Remy asked, stepping away and stuffing her hands into her pocket.

“It’s just a shirt to you. Dis one ain’ meant fo’ being stretched out o’ messed up.”

“What’s the big deal? It’s just—” Suddenly she stopped, and immediately Remy knew she’d figured it out. Jubilee was bright for her age, after all. “It’s _Logan’s,_ isn’t it! It is, I know it!”

“Jubilee, ple—”

“Admit it! It’s Logan’s shirt and you took it from him!”

“Remy didn’t steal it, if dat’s what yo’ implyin’!”

“No, I don’t think you did. Just borrowed it.” She hopped onto the edge of Remy’s bed, kicking her feet. “Permanently,” she added with a smirk.

Remy groaned and turned around again, clawing desperately at what few clothes were hung in there, trying to find something that could distract him long enough to ignore Jubilee or make her go away.

“So?” She asked.

“So what?” Remy snapped, dropping his hands at his sides. It was hopeless. Jubilee wasn’t going away. “Remy’s shirt got messed up, so Logan let him borrow his shirt. No big deal.”

“C’mon Remy, it’s a _huge_ deal!” She hopped down the bed and grabbed Remy’s wrist, tugging him around again and beaming at him. “Don’t you know what that means?! Tell me you know what that means. You of all people should know _what that means!!_ ”

Remy winced a little when she raised her voice and lifted one of his hands, gesturing for her to tone it down. He sighed, smirking a little. Why not let her amuse him? “Enlighten ‘im, please.”

“Well it’s like, the first sign of two people being interested in one another!”

Remy’s expression fell instantly. “It’s jus’ a shirt, Jubes.”

“It’s a _sign,_ ” she emphasized.

“A shirt.” He said firmly. “Don’ you have homework to do? Y’know, Remy bets you do. You let Remy change an’ we’ll get started—”

“Remy, you totally can’t avoid this. I _knew_ something was up when you were always hanging around Logan every single day of the week! That’s all you ever do. Don’t even try to say you don’t like him. You totally like him! I mean, I think he’s a douche, but it’s _you_ we’re talking about, and you always tell me that sometimes even the most unlikely people can be the closest of friends, right?”

Remy nodded weakly. “Oui, Remy’s said that.”

Jubilee jumped a little, still feeding off of her own excitement. “So c’mon, what’s the hold up? Don’t you like him?”

Remy didn’t say anything; his throat immediately went tight and his chest was met with a nearly unbearable pressure. Averting his gaze, he nodded again, only twice.

Jubilee seemed to sense the change in him and her smile faded a little. “… Then what is it?”

He figured he may as well say it. “Logan don’ like Remy. Not like dat.”

“What?” Her hand dropped from around his wrist. “But… no, c’mon,” she forced a laugh, reaching out to shove at his shoulder. “You’re just playing with me. You’re not… Logan likes you! Of course he does!”

“Non. He don’, petite.” He turned away and grabbed his coat again, pulling it on and grabbing a scarf for an added measure. He didn’t know when he’d be back. “Remy’s gon’ go out fo’ a while. He’ll be back by six at de latest. Tell ‘Ro fo’ Remy, oui?”

“Remy, I…” Jubilee stepped after him grabbing his sleeve. “I didn’t mean to, I didn’t want to make you feel bad, don’t go—”

“Remy needs some time to himself. It’s fo’ de best, oui?” He gently pried her hand away. “He can’ t’ink about Logan like dat. Remy’s known fo’ a little while dat he liked him mo’ dan what dey were, but… lately it’s gotten a bit much. He don’ know why.” Of course he knew why. How could he deny that Logan liking, maybe eventually loving, and even worse going on to marry someone other than him was killing him? “But… Logan don’ feel dat way, an’ Remy… he can’ change dat.” He let out a shaky breath, swallowing thickly. He was feeling his eyes burn just slightly and he looking away from Jubilee again. “Don’ fo’get to tell ‘Ro,” he said, and briskly walked out the door to his room, pulling on his shoes and striding out of the house. He walked down the porch and turned on the sidewalk, pulling the scarf close and wrapping his coat tightly around him. The shirt hugged him wonderfully like this, somewhat of a blessing and a curse. Remy shook his head, not thinking about it. Frankly, he didn’t want to think at all: he didn’t know where he was going and he didn’t know when he’d come back, but he needed time to get his thoughts straight. He needed to move on. Logan wasn’t going to be his, and he needed to accept that, whether he liked it or not.

Back at home, Jubilee slowly sat back on Remy’s bed, sighing. She heard footsteps from down the hall and looked up, meeting Ororo’s eyes. She looked compassionate all of the sudden, and Jubilee put on a smile for her. “Where is Remy?” She asked, and Jubilee smiled, shrugging.

“He stopped by for a little, but he had to go out again. He’ll be back later, around six.”

“Ah, no doubt out with Logan again, no? They always spend so much time together,” she said with a soft smile.

“Yeah,” Jubilee said, nodding, feeling her heart ache again. “They do.”


	3. Chapter 3

When five became five-thirty, and five-thirty became six, Jubilee started to worry.

It wasn’t bad enough that Remy had left the way he did, but she had a pretty good feeling that he wasn’t going to come back when he said he was. And what was worse was that Logan was going to be stopping by soon, and she wouldn’t even know what to say. She couldn’t tell him why he left, but she couldn’t lie and say he was there and everything was just fine. Because he wasn’t there, he wasn’t fine, and he probably wasn’t going to tell him why when the time came either.

In the kitchen, Jubilee fiddled with the sleeve of her coat, remembering the day Remy had bought it for her with what little money he had in the first place. He’d never had a job, and the only money he got was when he stole a few dollars here and there form unsuspecting men and women with wallets within easy reach. Remy never taught Jubilee how to do it, despite how many times she asked – “wouldn’ be good fo’ you,” he said, and she knew he was probably right.

Time passed far faster than she would have hoped, and out the front window, Logan’s truck pulled up. He was actually wearing decent looking jeans and a nice flannel with a white shirt underneath. Knowing it was the moment of truth, Jubilee took a deep breath and walked towards the door, opening it when Logan was halfway down the main walk.

“Oh, hey,” Logan said, smiling kindly at her. “Just came to get Remy. I mean, assuming he told you I was comin’ by.”

“Uh…” Jubilee bit her lip, sticking her head out the door and looking down both ends of the sidewalk. Not a soul in sight. “Yeah, he’s just, uh…”

Logan frowned, looking around with her. Was she waiting for someone? “You waitn’ on someone…?” he asked, his brows drawing together in confusion.

“N-no! Just, uh… come in.” She stepped aside and let Logan walk inside, looking around for a moment. It wasn’t like Logan had never seen the place – after all, Ororo had asked to meet his boy that Remy spent about all of his time with – but Remy didn’t like bringing Logan over here if he could help it. Not to mention, Logan had an entire house to himself roughly ten minutes away by car, so it wasn’t too out of the way. Plus, it had an Xbox, which was always Remy’s number one excuse to go there.

Jubilee led Logan into the kitchen, standing there a little awkwardly afterwards, not sure what to say. Logan was feeling his irritation rise a little, but he pushed it aside. “Look,” he started, “I’m not tryin’ to be rude, but we’ve got some plans tonight, and I’d rather not stand around while he... I dunno, does his makeup or something.”

Jubilee couldn’t help letting out a short laugh, but it faded quickly. She couldn’t keep him waiting. “Well, if your schedule’s that important to you, then I’ll cut to the chase, I guess.” Logan tilted his head to one side, and in one sentence, she basically spit it out: “So Remy came back earlier and he and I were talking a little, but then he got upset with me and he started to leave but I tried to stop him but he wouldn’t listen and he just left and this was a long time ago and he hasn’t come back yet and he was _supposed_ to at least a half hour ago but I don’t know where he is and I—” She stopped, taking a breath when she felt her eyes well up a little. “I don’t know where he is, Logan.”

Logan was silent for a long time, staring down at her in a mix of confusion and disbelief. Remy was gone? “Wait, wait…” He shook his head. “You’re saying he’s gone? He’s _been_ gone? How long?!”

“Not long after you dropped him off…”

“Did you—” He stopped and lowered his voice, trying not to draw attention. “Did you tell _anyone_ about this?”

“I…” She felt his throat tighten and her breath hitched. “I-I didn’t… I didn’t think he’d be gone so l-long… I didn’t think he’d leave…” She choked out a sob and bit her lower lip. “This is all my fault, I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut, I… He didn’t…” She sank into the chair and tried to refrain from crying. She hated appearing like this, especially in front of Logan. But Remy was gone, and she didn’t know where he went… She wiped her eyes and took a deep breath, keeping his gaze low. Logan paced the kitchen for a few seconds, unable to believe this. Remy was gone? Just like that? What was worse was that he’d been gone for some time… he could be anywhere by now. He looked over at Jubilee, who was wiping her eyes with her sleeve and sniffling, making Logan’s anger at her fade somewhat. He sighed and stepped closer, putting a comforting hand on Jubilee’s shoulder.

“I’m gonna go and find him. You need to stay here.”

“What?!” She instantly looked up, ready to protest. “B-but I want to go with you! I need to find him—”

 “You’re gonna stay here in case he comes back. And if he does, you need to call me. Here,” he looked around and grabbed a small note from the counter, snagging a pen and scribbling out his number. “That’s my number, call me if he comes back.”

Jubilee looked down at the number and frowned. “Has anyone told you that you’ve got really crappy handwriting?”

He swore he felt a vein in his forehead twitch. “I’ll see you later.” He left without another word, jogging out to his truck and starting the engine. Where Remy could have _possibly_ gone, he didn’t know. But he was damn well pissed that he chose tonight of all nights to go off on his own when it was getting dark. He wouldn’t stay out that much longer, right? He hated the cold, he’d have to come home… Logan drove down street after street, looking for him, calling his name from time to time. He did do that for too long; he worried that maybe it would drive him away.

Nearly an hour passed and night had fallen. The streets around Remy’s neighborhood were barely lit with flickering street lamps, which didn’t help Logan in the least. He’d gone practically everywhere: the park, the school, the store, even his own house. Sometimes, Remy would sneak in while he was at work (Logan didn’t even bother asking how he got in most times), but he wasn’t there either. Logan drove further out past Remy’s neighborhood, into a more suburban area where people like Scott, Jean, and Bobby lived, but he had no luck. He had a hunch that Remy wasn’t even here to begin with. He didn’t know why, but… it didn’t feel like he’d go that far.

Making his way back to Remy’s house, he pulled up and killed the engine, sitting there for a moment, wondering why the hell he’d run off in the first place. Everything had been fine; _great,_ even. Remy was laughing and grinning and being his old self again. But Jubilee had said that she had said something to him… he wondered if he could find out what that was somehow, maybe give him a clue as to where to look…

He went back in the house, nearly tackled in the process by Jubilee who thought Remy was with him. “Did you fin--?!” She stopped, seeing that no one was following him in.

“I need to ask you a few things,” Logan said, walking back into the kitchen. However, it seemed as though they weren’t alone anymore.

“Hello, Logan,” Ororo said softly, smiling kindly. “Please, sit.”

Suddenly feeling anxious, Logan did as he was asked. He didn’t really know what to say, so he kept quiet.

“I have already spoken with Jubilee. Remy’s disappearance is serious, but this isn’t cause for alarm just yet,” she said, and Logan immediately opened his mouth to protest, but she held her hand up, quieting him. “This is not the first time Remy has done something like this, as I’m sure you’re aware.”

Logan bowed his head a little. No, it wasn’t. It was rare when it happened; mostly it was because he got to thinking too much about his family, his mother and father, being unwanted and unneeded. It was definitely a sore subject for Remy, but he’d always come to Logan when he thought like that. Logan had managed to turn his mood around so many times in the past, but… he’d been gone too long this time.

“The only reason I say it is not time to panic just yet is because he could still come back tonight. I have told Jubilee that if he has not returned at the very least by the morning, I will go searching for him myself, and I will get others involved as well.”

“But why aren’t we doing this _now?!_ ” Logan asked, not caring if he raised his voice. This was Remy, and he wasn’t just going to leave him out there. “The sooner we find him, the better. We need to make sure he’s safe!”

“Logan… this may be difficult for you to understand, only because of what Jubilee has told me, but Remy may not wish to be found at this time.”

Ororo’s calm was starting to irritate him even more, and the moment she mentioned what Jubilee had apparently said again, he turned to her. “What did you say to him?” He stood up suddenly, the chair sliding back against the floor as he approached her, making her gasp and shrink back a little. He could see how guilty she felt, but it didn’t even register in Logan’s mind. “What did you say?!”

“ _Logan._ ” He looked back at Ororo, who’s eyes were narrowed almost dangerously. “Sit down.”

It wasn’t a request. Logan did so again after brief hesitation.

“It is not your business to know what Jubilee and Remy spoke about earlier. It is not your place to make Jubilee feel as though this is all her fault. She knows the consequences were out of her control now. She is _not_ to be blamed.”

Logan sighed, looking back at Jubilee, who fought back more tears. “I, uh… I’m sorry, Jubilee…” She nodded weakly, then looked to Ororo, who excused her with a single nod.

“Thank you.” She said, and her kinder tone was back now, easing Logan’s anxiety somewhat. “Now, you are more than welcome to stay until Remy returns. I will not send you away for that. I just want you to know… maybe it would be for the best for Remy to come to you again.”

“No, no, I want to be here when he comes back. He’s my _friend,_ I’m not just gonna leave him out in the cold! He needs someone, he needs _me._ ”

Ororo nodded. “He does, Logan… he does.” She looked away for a moment, and finally she shook her head. “But right now, he needs someone else. He needs someone to look after him… differently than you do.”

“I’m sorry, but how the hell do you know what he needs right now?”

“How do _you_?”

“Wh—I’m his best friend! Of course I know what he needs right now! I’m not stupid, this isn’t the first time this has happened, and every time he’s come to me! Why should this time around be any different?!”

“Because it _is_ different.”

Logan stared at her for a moment, his voice finally dropping, but his anger didn’t fade in the slightest. “Okay, what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means, this is not about Remy’s family. This is not about his life here at home. This is not about being bullied or rejected or anything like that. This is something else, something very personal to him. He needs a mother-figure who can talk to him about this. I know you share so much, Logan, and you do not need to tell me that. That does not change, however, that there are certain situations that you simply cannot help.”

Logan had a feeling they would be arguing until dawn at this rate. He already had his rebuttal ready, but Ororo simply would not back down. He wondered for a moment if maybe she was right; maybe it was best for her, an adult and a grown person with so much more experience… but he was Remy’s _best friend._ He knew what he needed and he knew how to take care of him. He sighed softly despite himself. Ororo and Jubilee knew something he didn’t. He obviously wasn’t going to find out. She was probably right, then… they could talk later. Until then, Remy would have to come home and talk to Ororo, then maybe Jubilee.

Logan stood slowly, taking a deep breath. “Fine,” he said. “I know I ain’t gonna win here. You’re the one in charge of him anyways… it’s probably for the best that he talks to you first.” He turned to walk out, but stopped, stepping right in front of her and leaning down over the table. “But when it comes to Remy, I can _always_ help him, no matter what. I don’t care what special situation he’s in. I’m gonna be there for him.” He stayed close for a moment, letting the words sink in before he straightened again. “Have him call me tomorrow when he’s back,” he said over his shoulder, walking out into the frigid night and getting into his truck, starting it and heading home.

Even after staring at his phone for five hours, Remy never called.

\----------

Ororo lifted her head when she heard the door creak open. A glance at the clock on the wall read roughly half past one in the morning. There had been longer nights in the past, but considering when he left, she had no doubt Remy would be exhausted. It was only a proven theory when Remy shuffled into the kitchen and slumped into the chair across from her, his eyes red and dark underneath, and his entire posture one of pure fatigue. His head was bowed low, probably some mix of knowing his wrongs and his desire for sleep. Ororo knew she would have to keep this short if she wanted to maintain his attention.

“Desole,” Remy murmured, his arms resting on the table, fingers picking at the sleeve covering the opposite arm. “Remy didn’… he jus’…”

“I know that you are going through a lot, Remy,” she said slowly, reaching out a hand to rest on his arm. He flinched away from it at first, so she decided to lay her hand flat on the surface of the table. It would do for now. He would accept her contact when he was ready for it.

“Remy left an’ didn’ give a single clue ‘bout where he’d gone. Pro’lly hurt de petite’s feelin’s, too…” he sighed heavily, his head bowing lower. “An’ Logan’s…” Saying his name aloud still hurt him, deep inside. He was conflicted in feeling pain and anger, things he still hadn’t managed to sort out over his walk.

“That is what we need to talk about…”

“She tol’ you, didn’ she…?” Remy for the first time looked up, his eyes bearing no sign of surprise. He didn’t consider Jubilee a tattletale or a gossip for telling Ororo. He wasn’t angry with her. She would have eventually found out way or another.

Ororo nodded slowly. “Yes, she did. Only for your well-being, and because I asked her what she had said to you. She was very distraught over it, taking the blame upon herself.” She watched as Remy’s gaze fell again. “Logan was not very helpful towards her in regards to her feelings, but after he left, I managed to settle her down enough to let her sleep.” She watched his reaction at her mention of Logan; cold, indifferent silence. “He is waiting for you to call him and let him know you’ve returned.”

“He’ll see Remy on Monday.”

She raised an eyebrow at him slowly. “You will not inform your best friend that you are alright?”

Remy shrugged. “He’s probably busy. Remy don’ wanna bot’er him.”

“Remy,” she said softly, “I know now that you feel for Logan in a way you believe he does not feel for you.”

“It ain’ no belief, ‘Ro. He don’. Told Remy himself.”

“That he does not like you?”

 “Dat he ain’ gay.” Remy pulled at a loose thread in his sleeve. “Close enough.”

She was quiet for a few moments, knowing there was nothing she could say. Remy would not accept any other answer at this point. Logan didn’t like him, and that was that. No encouragement from her would change his feelings towards it. “Nevertheless, that is no reason to pull away from him so suddenly. What did you accomplish tonight by leaving without a word?”

“Remy got some o’ his t’oughts straight.”

“But what of Logan? What of Jubilee? And myself, no less?” She leaned closer. “We were worried _sick,_ Remy. We thought something terrible had happened to you.”

“Wouldn’ make no difference if somet’in’ had happened. Life goes on wit’ Remy, life goes on wit’out him.”

She raised a hand, pointing a finger directly at him. “Do _not_ say that, Remy LeBeau,” she spoke sharply. “Do not think for one moment that you are not important enough that people will not notice nor care if you are gone. I will _not_ hear you say such things about yourself.”

Remy met her gaze with wide eyes, now sat frozen, somewhat taken aback by her tone.

“You are important,” she said. “You, your feelings, your heart… they all matter. I care, and Jubilee cares. Logan cares too. Why else would he have gone searching for you after he found out you’d been gone?” She waited for Remy to say something, but he remained silent. “I cannot empathize with you about your feelings for Logan… I do not know how it feels, but I can only imagine it is a feeling of deep pain and sorrow, knowing that the one you so deeply care for does not return your affection. But you need to stay strong, Remy. Logan needs his best friend, and I know that you need him too.”

Remy nodded slowly, but he was still unconvinced. He didn’t disagree; they needed one another. Even when Remy assumed he was doing the right thing when he left the house, not being with Logan hurt him. It made him feel more lonely than he ever had been in his entire life since he met Logan. But he didn’t think being with Logan would solve his problems. It would only make him long for him even more. And he was sure, one day, he would slip. He would do something or say something that he would regret, and Logan would completely push him away. It was why he decided that the less time he spent around Logan, the better. It would probably be what he wanted anyways, especially if he and Jean got together.

“I hope you have thought about what I said… or you will, later, when you have rested.” Ororo smiled gently, and Remy nodded again. 

“Oui, he will.” He slowly stood, an ache still in his chest. He turned before he left and said, “T’ank you, ‘Ro.”

“Anytime, Remy.”

He turned away and slowly walked back to his room, gently closing the door behind him and pulling off his scarf and coat, then kicked off his shoes and changed into a pair of loose shorts. He still felt the chill from the cold air outside and quickly slipped beneath the covers on his bed. He pulled them tightly around himself, curling up tightly and cradling a pillow between his head and his shoulder. He felt exhaustion wash over him and his eyes began to close, eyelids feeling incredibly heavy. Idly, he pulled up the collar of Logan’s shirt, breathing in the strong scent, his entire body relaxing at the familiarity of it. He was asleep within moments, dreaming that he was warm and safe inside Logan’s arms.

\----------

When Remy never called all day Sunday, Logan knew he’d just have to wait until Monday to see him again. He was tempted to go over there and pound on the door, ask if he was there – or even _back_ – but he had a feeling that despite how Logan had acted on Saturday, Ororo would at least let him know when it would be a good time to come over or see Remy.

Nothing changed at school; the people were the same, the chatter was the same, and the overcrowded hallways were the same. But Logan knew that something was terribly wrong, because he hadn’t seen Remy, he hadn’t even heard from him or gotten any kind of indication that he was around. He didn’t have class with him until second period anyways, but it felt strange not having him hanging on his shoulder, making snarky comments or snide remarks about what he was wearing, what he was grabbing, how he worked too hard or should relax and, as always, “get laid”. It was only when Remy was gone did he realize just how much he equally depended on him to always be there, and how much he would miss him if he wasn’t around.

He closed the locker with a sigh and stuff the remaining book into his back, turning and jumping with a fright.

Jean made a small sound of surprise and took a step back. “I-I’m sorry!” She said hurriedly, placing a hand on Logan’s arm out of sympathy. Logan looked at it, eyes still wide, then back at Jean.

“Jesus,” he breathed out, shaking his head before letting the shock pass. “Uh… hey, Jean.”

“Hi.” She smiled, dropping her hand from his arm. He missed the warmth of it for a brief moment, but it passed. “I really didn’t mean to scare you…”

“No, I know.” Logan laughed a little, trying to be polite. Given the current situation with Remy, it was hard to think about being happy or seeming alright.

Almost as if on cue, Jean asked, “So, how was your weekend?”

Logan hesitated to answer. He was sure Jean wouldn’t say anything, but he wasn’t sure yet… if he told her about Remy, it would spread through the school like wildfire. The last thing Remy needed right now was to come back and have people taunting him for running away from home. Some kids around this school thrived on making him feel miserable. Suddenly Logan realized he’d been quiet for a least ten or so seconds, and he stuttered as he replied, “U-uh, good! It was good, it was… yeah, fine.” He felt his face heat up, then forced himself to ask, “What about you…?”

“Wonderful. I got to help out in a nursing home with a good family friend who works there.”

Logan couldn’t help but snort at that. “A nursing home is your idea of a good weekend?”

Jean seemed slightly affronted. “Well, it’s good experience for being a nurse, so…”

“Oh!” Immediately, he felt stupid. “God, I’m sorry, I wasn’t even thinking about…”

“No, it’s okay.” She smiled sweetly, forgiving him. “I know, for a football player that must seem pretty boring… I mean, what’d you do, go to some parties this weekend?”

He laughed, shaking his head. “No… I’m not really a big fan of those things. I mean, everyone’s loud, obnoxious, getting drunk… it’s annoying. And they’ll usually blast the music too, which really pisses me off… Even if I wanted to go, I couldn’t have. I worked both Saturday and Sunday.” Again, his mind crossed over Remy; he’d barely gotten any sleep Saturday or Sunday night ever since he left.

“So, if you don’t party and you work on the weekends, I take it… what do you do in your down time?”

“Mostly I hang out with Remy.” He shrugged. It wasn’t really a secret, was it?

Despite it, she feigned surprise. “Really?”

He shrugged again, not really sure what else to do. “Yeah.”

“I don’t want to sound rude, but… why?”

“Why?” Logan repeated, frowning. “I don’t need a reason, do I?”

“No, no!” She said quickly. “I just… it surprises me, I guess. Remy’s a nice guy it seems like, and he’s kinda like the prankster in our class, but… I really don’t know how you two even get along.” She smiled and added, “I’d figure you for someone who’d take his head off after ten minutes.”

Logan laughed at that. “Let’s just say I have a lot of self control.”

“Oh, do you?” Suddenly Jean was leaning against the lockers in front of him, her smile shifting from genuinely kind to something of a… different intention.

“Yeah…” Logan shifted on his feet, immediately straightening up when the bell rang. “Hey, I’ll see you later.”

Jean nodded, stepping away from the lockers. “I’ll see you later, Logan.” She walked the opposite direction he was going, but her eyes remained locked on his until she brushed past his shoulder, making his face heat up significantly. He swallowed thickly and closed his locker, bowing his head as he pushed through the crowd of students and went to class. He sat in his regular seat and slouched low in his chair, keeping to himself and pulling out whatever notebook he’d need for class. Right when the bell rang, the teacher began talking and started writing on the board – at which time one other student slipped inside the classroom, unnoticed.

Logan’s eyes widened at the sight of Remy: he looked more pale than usual and had an exhausted look to him, but he was still incredibly quiet as he went to the back row to find a seat for himself… despite the fact that the chair beside Logan was open.

Logan looked at the teacher and back to Remy, who didn’t even appear the least bit interested in what the teacher was talking about. His eyes were drawn to the desk and his focus was completely lost. Careful not to draw any attention, he tried to get Remy to notice him. “Hey…!” he whispered, getting some pointed glares from a few students up front. He rolled his eyes and tried again, snapping his fingers once and trying again. “Hey, Remy!”

For a split second, Remy’s eyes flickered over to him, but suddenly they were drawn to the board at the front of the room. Remy didn’t want to talk to Logan right now. He didn’t want to hear what he’d say; how angry he was for ditching him, how he never called, how he just _left_ and didn’t say a word. He felt guilty for it, but even now he wasn’t sure if given another chance, he’d change his mind.

Logan, having enough of it, slipped out of his seat when the teacher was distracted and sat in the chair beside Remy. Remy gave him a rather confused look, but Logan ignored it. “Okay, I’m bettin’ you know that I’ve got a _lot_ of questions for you,” he said in a low murmur, leaning over so Remy could hear him.

“Not now,” he said simply. Shocked, Logan faced him and blinked a few times, not sure he heard him right.

“Remy, we _need_ to talk—”

“Not now, Logan!” He said a little louder, and up front, the teacher cleared his throat.

“Anything you’d like to share?” He asked, waiting impatiently.

“Non, desole.” Remy answered, sitting up a little more. “Carry on.”

Logan sat back in his seat, resting his chin on his hand as he waited stubbornly for the teacher to stop sparing glances back directly at them. Remy watched the teacher intently, focusing on the lesson… well at least as best as he could. He could feel Logan’s eyes on him and he could feel the way he was taking in his appearance, noticing all of the little things that he’d tried to hide when he took some makeup from Jubilee that morning. It felt almost pathetic, trying to hide himself from Logan, of all people.

“Remy,” came the voice again.

Remy closed his eyes, willing it away.

“… I’m not gonna let you just pretend I don’t exist.”

He didn’t say a word.

“Damnit Remy, this isn’t going to get us _anywhere._ ”

He opened his eyes and took in a deep breath, growing more annoyed. Couldn’t he take a hint? Well, this _was_ Logan…

“Remy, I’m about to drag you out of this room by your damned coat if you don’t say someth—”

Finally Remy turned to him. “ _Merde,_ Logan, can’ you just give Remy five minutes o’ peace?!” He whispered harshly. “Don’ speak to Remy. Don’t say a goddamn _word_ o’ so help him he’ll walk right out o’ here and you won’ see him again fo’ as long as he feels like not bein’ seen.”

Logan pulled back, stunned and hurt. He didn’t even know what to say back to that. Remy wanted space. Fine. So be it. “Guess if that’s what you want.” Logan muttered, slumping into his chair and watching the teacher again.

Remy closed his eyes again, this time willing himself to maintain some sort of composure. He couldn’t talk to Logan. He didn’t need him interrogating him about where he’d been and why he’d never called. He gripped the side of the desk and waited, waited for class to be over. He both wanted it to happen instantly and never, because as much as he’d love to get out and go back home and pretend to never have left in the first place, he also didn’t want Logan on his heels, demanding what was going on.

When class was dismissed, Remy grabbed his backpack instantly and stood, slinging it over his shoulder and pushing past people to get out. Logan growled under his breath and went after him, pushing people aside with much less grace than Remy did. Remy was slim and knew how to go practically unnoticed; it was probably what made him as good as he was at being a thief from time to time.

Nevertheless, Logan could still catch up if he really tried; he pushed his way through, earning him a few curses and some comments of ‘what the hell is wrong with you?’, but Logan paid them no mind. What mattered was catching up to Remy, and as soon as he reached out and grabbed the sleeve of his coat, Remy whirled around and glared at him, pulling back at it. “Let go,” he hissed, his eyes narrowed.

“No, you’re comin’ with me.” Logan now grabbed his wrist, having a much better grip this way, and pulled him to the edge of the hallway and guided him towards the exit of the school.

“Where’re you takin’ Remy, Logan?!” He resisted against him. “You know you can’ leave school in de middle o’ de day, right?!”

“I don’t care,” Logan growled, leading him out the side door and walking a small ways away to a bare side of the building, finally letting go of Remy’s wrist, but not moving an inch away from him. “You wanna tell me where the hell you’ve been the last two fucking days?!”

“Dat ain’ any o’ yo’ business!” he snapped suddenly, stepping in close. “What Remy does in his time ain’ no concern o’ yo’s.”

“We were supposed to get together, and then you go missing! How the hell am I supposed to take that? How is that _not_ any of my concern?!”

“It jus’ ain’. You don’ gotta know every detail o’ Remy’s life. He was gon’ come back anyways, so what’s de big deal?”

“Well newsflash, Remy, I happen to be your damned best friend. I’m not leavin’ you when you need me. You go and vanish off the face of the earth and don’t even call, you don’t say a fucking word, and I’m sat there, watching the phone for hours on end, thinking about any number of things that could have happened to you. You could’ve been hurt, you could’ve been taken, hell, you could’ve even _died!_ And all I get is a stern lecture from ‘Ro and not a single hint as to whether you’re alright or not!” He took a deep breath, pacing away from him for a moment. He shook his head before turning around again. His eyes shined with tears and his voice shook as he spoke again. “I had _no idea_ where you were, Remy. Not a single goddamn clue. And you show up here and act like we don’t even know each other. I told myself I’d _never_ ask you this, but what the _fuck_ is wrong with you?!”

Remy stared at him for a long time, not sure what to say. He felt his throat tighten to a point where he could barely breath, and his vision slowly blurred as well. He bit his lower lip and swallowed, opening his mouth to respond, but it wasn’t for another half minute before he said anything. “Remy can’… he needed time.”

“Time?” Logan stepped closer to him again, his voice lower and his expression confused. “Time for what?”

“It ain’ easy to explain,” he said softly, stepping back with one foot. He couldn’t be so close to Logan. Dropping his gaze, he sighed, trying to figure out what to say so Logan wouldn’t ask anymore. “He jus’ neededto clear his head. Take a walk, y’know?” He put on a light smile and looked up at him. “Remy’s better now t’ough. It helped, an’ he feels better now.”

Logan noticed how he’d moved back. He noticed the way he didn’t want to be close to him. Perhaps he was too rough with him… he knew Remy didn’t take kindly to such forceful treatment. “You sure...? You can tell me what’s wrong, Remy. It’s _me,_ it’s Logan. I’m your best friend.”

The words stung. He couldn’t tell him, not if he wanted to – and he really, _really_ wanted to. In his mind he could imagine it; him confessing what he was feeling to Logan, how he liked him, so much, and how he wanted to be with him. He wanted to try, because Logan was probably the only person in the world for him. And he imagined him miraculously admitting that he’d had feelings for him too, and he never knew how to say it to him. That he didn’t want Jean, that he wanted him, and that he would give everything to have Remy. And it would be the perfect moment, the best Remy had ever had in his entire life, and finally, he could be truly happy. But this wasn’t a fantasy land. Remy knew he was being irrational. He quickly wiped at his face when he felt a tear roll down his cheek. “Oui, Remy… Remy’s sure.”

Logan was hesitant to accept he was telling the truth. Remy could see it clearly on his face, how his eyes were drawn to the tearstain on his cheek. Logan wasn’t always as slow as people liked to claim. He was intuitive, probably more than most. He knew something was still wrong.

“Logan, believe Remy. As a friend.” Taking a leap of faith, he reached out and rested a hand on Logan’s shoulder. Funny, how just over a week ago this would have been the most normal gesture. Remy felt like he had to tip-toe around Logan now. “Remy’s fine. Everyt’in’s good.”

“If you say so… I’ll trust you on that.”

“T’ank you, mon ami,” he said, dropping his hand. A silence fell over them, and Remy sniffled softly, taking a deep breath. “Now, c’mon… dere’s still time to get you to class… you can’ miss practice today, after all.” He started to walk around Logan to get inside, but Logan reached out and grabbed his arm. He stopped and looked down at his hand, then up at Logan, puzzled.

“You really think we’re goin’ back in that hellhole?”

“Judgin’ by yo’ question, Remy’s gon’ assume dat you’ve got ot’er t’ings in mind.”

One corner of Logan’s mouth quirked up and he let go of Remy. “And people say I’m slow.”

Remy smirked, feeling the weight on his shoulders lift a little. “Don’ even start wit’ dat subject. Remy wouldn’ wanna ruin yo’ day by remidnin’ you o’ all de times he’s had to explain t’ings so slow, a two year-old coulda caught on faster dan you.”

“There can’t be _that_ many times,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“You really wanna challenge Remy?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at him. Logan opened his mouth to egg him on, but he knew better; Remy’s mind was like a steel trap when it came to certain things. Logan’s many slow moments in the past was just one of those subjects that Remy never dropped when it came up again.

“… Fuck you.” He said simply, and Remy laughed.

“Remy’ll take dat as a win.”

“You’re only up by one. I could easily catch up to you again.”

“Again? You make dat sound like you’ve caught up befo’.” He held his expression of feigned surprise for a few seconds before snorting, crumbling into laughter at Logan’s frown.

“Shut it, Cajun,” he muttered.

“Remember what Remy said, dere ain’ no entertainment wit’out him around.”

“You may be right.” He turned and walked out towards the parking lot, gesturing for Remy to follow.

Remy followed him, but he still had questions. “We’re leavin’? What about yo’ practice?”

“They’ll survive without me.”

“What about yo’ physical shape, eh? Dat form ain’ gon’ last fo’ever, y’know.”

“Since when is that important? That’s not the reason I play football.”

“Really? Because Remy t’inks you go to try an’ compete wit’ him.”

Logan gave him an odd look. “Compete? Why the hell do you think that’s why I play football?”

Remy stopped, spreading his arms. “Really, Logan? You t’ink wit’out football, you’d be able to _compare_ to dis?”

Loagn gave him a once-over, admitting only to himself that yes, Remy always _did_ have a nice form… “You’re a vain, self-obsessed bastard.” He said, pretending to ignore him.

“Even wit’ football, you ain’ nearly in as good o’ shape as Remy is!”

“You really think you’re in better shape than I am?”

Remy looked smug. “Oui, Remy does.”

“Well, I’m on the football team, remember? I work out for three hours a day and then play games every Friday night. I exercise daily and eat _actual_ food, not Doritos and Coke.”

“Dere’s a huge difference between Coke an’ Diet Coke, Logan.”

“That’s not the point; you don’t do _anything._ Seriously, you could sit on the couch and watch TV or play Xbox for a week straight if you wanted too. Sports aren’t just fun and games—”

“Technically, sports _are_ games…”

“—they’re hard word and discipline and require a lot of practice and activity. Not like you’d know; you’ve never done a single sport in your life.”

“’Ey, don’ go around sayin’ dat cheerleadin’s not a sport! It’s hard work.”

Logan couldn’t help but laugh, shaking his head and throwing his backpack into the bed of his truck, Remy doing the same. “What, all those jumps and pom pom throwing exercises mean you’re in better physical shape than I am? Is that it?”

Remy stepped into the truck, feeling completely at ease. “Oui, dey do. Dose pom pom tosses take lots o’ control an’ attention to detail.” As soon as Logan turned on the ignition, Remy asked, “Where you takin’ Remy, anyways?”

“To get a decent meal. And then, to see that movie we were _supposed_ to see on Saturday.” Logan looked at him pointedly, playfully accusing him. “You stood me up, remember?”

“Oui, Remy did. But what if he don’ wanna go on a date righ’ now? ‘Specially dressed like dis?” He gestured to himself.

“I’m not lettin’ you get outta this, Cajun. You could be wearin’ a garbage bag, and I’d still drag you with me.” He shifted gears and pulled out of the parking lot, heading towards the downtown area. Remy smiled as he looked out the window and watched the trees go by, his mood elevated and his heart warmer now. It had to have been the first time he’d smiled honestly since Logan had dropped him off at Ororo’s.

“A garbage bag? C’mon now, mon ami, don’ you got any standards?” To himself, he laughed at his own comment; he was interested in Jean. Of course he had no standards.

“Shut it, it was more of an expression. We’re already on our way, there’s no reason tryin’ to get out of it now. Besides, I’m giving you free food – again. You look like you haven’t eaten in days.”

Remy didn’t comment on that last part. “You don’ ever take no fo’ an answer, do you?” He said, glancing over at him.

“Nope.” He smirked over at Remy, who grinned and settled back in his seat, propping one foot up on the dash as he closed his eyes and let Logan take him wherever he wanted them to go.

\----------

Remy filled up on a hearty meal – otherwise known as a double bacon cheeseburger with two sides of fries and a large drink. Logan watched in amazement as he downed the meal without breaking a single sweat or stopping at all to take a breath. “Jesus, you’re like a bottomless pit…”

“Remy’s storin’ fo’ winter, Logan,” he pointed out, taking a long sip of his soda before digging into the fries again. Logan rolled his eyes and finished his own burger, wiping his hands on the napkin and pulling out his phone. Remy watched, pushing down his anxiety that he was maybe calling Jean to tell her where he was, why he wasn’t there to be fawned over. He focused on his meal, vaguely listening, but was surprised when Logan called his coach. Apparently, Logan was having a “family emergency”. Remy smiled. Whether he meant it like that or not, Remy liked being considered Logan’s family.

As soon as he hung up the phone, Remy took a final sip of his soda, pushing his tray forward, letting Logan know he was done.

“You done? Finally?”

Remy appeared contemplative, then asked, “You got de dessert menu?”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Very funny. C’mon, if you wanna make that movie showing, we’d better get going.” He stood from the booth and grabbed the tray, dropping it off and leading Remy away.

The movie was as good as Remy had hoped; even Logan liked it, despite supernatural movies not really being his thing most times. He was glad to see Remy enjoying himself again, and at his request, he took Remy back to Ororo’s place. Normally Logan would have taken him back to his own place, but Remy claimed he had some things to take care of. Logan accepted it as it was, pulling up in front of the walkway to Remy’s home and parking.

“T’anks fo’ de day out… Remy really enjoyed himself.” He smiled, stepping out of the truck and grabbing his bag. He slung it over his shoulder and leaned against the open door.

“Anytime. I’ll see you tomorrow, right?”

Remy nodded. “Oui, ‘course you will. Ain’ nowhere he’d rat’er be.”

“Good.” Logan didn’t seem intent on pulling away so soon, but a phone call disrupted the small moment between them. Logan pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID, smiling to himself. It was Jean.

“Looks like you’ve got plans tonight, eh?” Remy asked casually.

“I’d ah… I’d better take this.”

“Don’ let Remy intrude, den.” He stepped away, hand on the door. “An don’ fo’get, don’ do anyt’in’ Remy wouldn’ do!” He forced a smile, glad that Logan found amusement in his words when he laughed.

“Yeah, yeah, get inside now.” He shooed him away and opened the phone, then called out, “And no wandering off!”

Remy closed the door behind him and waved him off, walking inside. It was bittersweet, but it was how it was supposed to be.

\----------

Over the course of the week, Remy and Logan’s time together seemed to change drastically; Remy kept his distance from Logan, and Jean became a larger part of Logan’s life. They occasionally walked down the hall together, Remy tagging along behind, only because he had the same class as Logan. Still, he completely remove himself; he still went home with Logan, he still played his Xbox and took his food and wore his clothes. He sat through at practice too. But now, he wasn’t the only one there on the bleachers watching Logan.

It was Wednesday afternoon when Jean climbed up the first two rows of bleachers and sat down, scarf tied close around her neck and coat worn snugly around her waist. Her hands were covered in red gloves and she breathed into them when a breeze passed over them. She watched the practice intently, smiling when Logan made a good play and clapping here and there. She didn’t seem to pay Remy any mind, who did his homework as usual. As soon as he saw her, he kept his head low and worked without a single distraction, wanting to get the assignment done.

Practice was over and Logan came over to the fence, but Remy didn’t move. He knew it wasn’t Remy that Logan was wanting to talk to. He packed his books away slowly, watching them from afar, wondering what they were talking about. Logan seemed to agreeing to something… maybe making plans. For a moment, he looked up at Remy, then smiled back at Jean. It was another five or so minutes before Jean left, and Remy finally walked down the stairs, his gaze following Jean. He sighed softly and looked up at Logan when he approached the gate, gesturing to Jean with his head. He looked happy, almost relieved. Remy cleared his throat. “So, you got a date?”

Logan blinked. “How did you—”

“Remy can read you like an open book, mon ami. It ain’ dat hard.”

Logan frowned for a moment, then sighed. “Yeah, I have a date. So what?” He looked away, his face turning a little red. Remy smiled fondly, unable to be mad when Logan looked so adorable.

“When is it?”

“Uh, Friday, after practice.”

“Oh.” Remy blinked, surprised. This wouldn’t impede on their tradition though… it couldn’t. “Where you goin’?”

“To a movie, then dinner. It’s not really serious or anything…”

“Non, but if dis is a legit date, you gon’ need a little wardrobe improvement.” Remy gave him a very pointed look, and Logan scoffed.

“What, and you’re suddenly a fashion designer?”

He shrugged. “It fills in time between cheerleadin’ practices.” He stepped away from the fence and Logan did the same walking towards the locker room to get changed. “Remy’ll be by de car, an’ after you take a good shower, Remy’s gon’ take you shoppin’ to get you some decent clot’es.”

“What’s wrong with what I’ve got now?” Logan almost looked offended. “There’s nothing wrong with plaid and jeans. It’s comfortable.”

“Logan, you practically look like a lumberjack, an’ de only t’ing missin in dat wardrobe is an axe.” He said matter-of-factly. “Just get changed, let’s get you showered, an’ den we’ll get you some nicer clot’es.”

“But… okay, what if I wore my—”

“No jersey. Go change.”

“Damnit…”

When Logan reemerged from the school and walked towards his truck, Remy smiled and waited for Logan to unlock it before hopping inside. “Right, let’s get this over with,” Logan grumbled, starting the truck and heading back home. His shower was brief, and he got changed – he wore his jersey and a flannel over that, paired with some worn jeans, all of which Remy was certain he chose just to spite him – and they headed to the mall downtown. Remy managed to pick up some cash along the way without Logan noticing and led him into a nicer store, dragging him towards the men’s section and pulling out some smart button-up shirts.

Logan looked around and felt completely uncomfortable; this wasn’t his type of store. This was a place for businessmen and CEO’s, things he wasn’t and never would be. Logan kept tugging at Remy’s coat sleeve, trying to convince him that there were other place they could go to, but Remy was insistent, telling Logan that “hicks don’t get laid”.

Remy pulled Logan in front of him and held up some shirts to his front, stepping back and looking over him. By the time he’d tested almost every color – even a light pink, which Logan immediately shot down much to Remy’s dismay – he finally had a choice few, shoving them in Logan’s arms and pushing him towards a dressing room.

Logan sighed and pulled off his flannel and jersey, putting on the first shirt, which was a soft green color. It vaguely reminded him of the shirt Remy had ‘borrowed’ and he smiled to himself, buttoning it up and looking at himself in the mirror. It seemed to fit like a glove, and he wondered what Jean would think of him when he saw him like this… he had to admit, wearing clothing like this was very much an improvement. It would probably make Jean think he really cared about what she thought of him – which he did of course – and would help things go well on Friday.

There was a knock on the door and a very familiar nagging voice on the other side: “’Ey, don’ fo’get to show Remy when yo’ done in dere.”

He groaned loudly, making sure Remy heard, and opened the door with a severely unimpressed expression. Remy didn’t even notice it; his eyes widened and his mouth dropped a little. The shirt hugged his waist perfectly but was still loose enough to be comfortable. Even as Logan fiddled ith the cuffs on the wrist and had apparently forgotten to fasten the first button, Remy was completely taken with his appearance.

“So, uh… thoughts…?”

Remy snapped out of his reverie and put on a smirk. “Well, let’s put it dis way; yo’ probably gon’ get laid sooner dan you t’ink.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Okay, so I’ve tried this one, does it mean I have to try all the others?”

Remy sighed heavily. “Well dat would be _ideal…_ ”

“Yeah but it’s also a pain in my ass. Just… imagine it, or something.”

Remy seemed to consider it and he waved his hand. “Alrigh’, alrigh’, jus’ get outta dat one and we’ll call it good.” Logan immediately had shut the door behind him and was taking off the shirt, hanging it back up as soon as he was done. By chance, he caught sight of the tag and nearly choked. On the other side of the door, Remy was still walking. “But you _will_ have to wear dem all eventually so Remy can take one back if he needs to.”

Logan swung the door open as soon as he was dressed, holding up the shirt and pointing at the tag. “Do you realize how expensive these are?!”

Remy looked at the price and didn’t bat an eye. “Oui, he does now.”

“Remy, these three shirts together are more than I make in a week at work. How the hell am I gonna afford that?!”

“Remy’s got you covered mon ami.” He pulled out a significant amount of cash from his pocket and smirked.

Logan’s shoulders slouched a little. “Remy, where did you get that…”

“Ain’ any o’ yo’ concern. Now go, wait out front. Remy’s got you covered.” He took the shirts from Logan and walked right up to the woman at the register, paying for the shirts and even flirting with the cashier a little on the side. Logan knew he couldn’t stop him at that point and walked out front, already feeling a little anxious for his date on Friday.

\--------

By the time Friday finally rolled around, Remy had let Logan take him straight home after practice, letting him get to his date that much faster. He still promised to pick up Remy to take him to the game, which was indeed the only thing keeping him smiling at the moment. He sat in his room and played with a deck of cards, shuffling and playing solitaire and shuffling again when he was bored. He thought about the assignments that he could be doing – he had an art project due next week that he’d been putting off, after all… - but sat right where he was, not finding enough motivation to get out of bed.

The hours passed slowly, but soon enough 6:30 came around, and Remy put on a long sleeved black shirt and loose jeans, pulling on his long coat and adding a red scarf, not wanting to freeze his ass off that night. He stepped out and waited on the porch a few minutes early, smiling to himself when Logan’s truck pulled up. He stood and grinned, but it instantly faded and he stood frozen on the spot. Logan opened the door and came around the vehicle, jogging up to him. “Hey,” he said a little breathlessly. Remy finally looked at him and waited for him to explain. This wasn’t the way it should be.

“Hey.” Remy said.

“I uh… Jean was going to see the game anyways, and… I said I could drive her.”

“Oui, Remy sees her in de car.”

Logan frowned a little, then stepped back towards the truck. “Well, c’mon, we don’t want to be late.”

“Non,” Remy said softly, following after him. “We don’.” He stepped in the back seat and settled in the seat behind Logan’s, wanting to be as far from Jean as possible. He nearly felt an urge to hiss at her when she turned around and smiled at him.

“Hey, Remy, how are you?”

“Good, t’anks fo’ askin’.” He looked out the window, but looked back at her and forced a smile. “An’ you?”

“Really good,” she said, and she looked at Logan with a grin. He laughed and kept driving to the game, and Remy sank lower in his seat. Nothing like being a third wheel.

The drive to the school was thankfully short. As soon as Logan parked the truck, they all got out and Jean took Logan’s hand and wished him good luck, told him he’d be great, and that she’d be watching from the stands. He grinned and went to the locker rooms, and Remy stood beside Logan’s truck, feeling forgotten. Logan hadn’t even waited for Remy to say anything to him.

It was an awkward silence when Jean and Remy went to the stands. They sat next to each other in the second row, and as soon as the game started, Remy would have rather been sitting on the grass than next to Jean. She was excited and loud and all of her friends from school had found her and sat in a row beside her. They all screamed and cheered and gave Remy a headache, giggling and shouting Logan’s name when he made a good play.

It was an easy win for the Wolverines. The last whistle was blown, and the game came to an end. Jean jumped out of her seat suddenly and slipped past the people in the first row, running across the stands and taking two steps at a time to the field. Remy felt his breathing stop and he stood, watching in utter confusion and heavy anxiety. The girls beside him ‘ooh’ed and were clapping, but Remy heard none of it; he watched as Jean pushed through some of the football players, finding the familiar jersey of number 15, stopping him in his tracks. Logan took off his helmet and looked as if he were about to ask her something, but he was cut short.

Remy nearly felt his heart tear in two when Jean pulled Logan down and kissed him in front of the entire crowd, who applauded and cheered. He slumped down in his seat, completely lost in the mass of people who stood around him. He knew that things were never going to be the same, that things were never going to be alright. He’d lost Logan, and there was nothing he could do. 


	4. Chapter 4

Laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, Remy sighed softly, his mind replaying the kiss from the football game over and over. He wished he could have stopped it somehow, or possibly not been there at all. Being blissfully unaware would be infinitely better than constantly feeling his heart ache and his chest tighten uncomfortably at the mere flicker of the memory. Even thinking about Logan or Jean made him want to curl on his side and never come out of the room again. Of course, that was never to be his fate. He’d eventually have to go to school, see Logan again, pretend everything was alright when it simply _wasn’t_.

With a deep sigh, he turned on his side and faced the wall away from the door, asking himself what he’d done to deserve this. Maybe his thieving was catching up to him. Perhaps his lies here and there were coming full circle. Deep down, he was beginning to believe that he would never live to feel true happiness for as long as he lived.

There was a soft knock on the door, and Remy didn’t even move to acknowledge it. He was half tempted to ignore it, or even sneak out the window and escape. It wouldn’t be that hard to reach…

“Can I come in…?” It was Jubilee. Things had been a little rocky ever since he’d vanished the weekend before, but Remy tried to make amends with her. He smiled at her, hugged her, made sure to tell her where he was off to and promising to be back. He’d followed through on her promises, but it didn’t change that she was tip-toeing around him.

Again, she knocked.

“Remy…”

He took a deep breath and sat up, clearing his throat a little and running a hand through his hair. Practicing a smile, he called back, “Oui, Remy’s here.”

The door opened slowly and Jubilee stepped in, smiling gently for him. Remy returned it, giving her an inquiring look. “Do you need Remy, petite?”

“Well, ‘Ro’s made lunch… and we didn’t see you at breakfast.” She leaned against the doorway, waiting for some sort of acknowledgement or explanation. When Remy offered none, she went on, laughing a little. “C’mon Remy, I know you like going on about your form, but starving yourself isn’t the way to stay in shape.”

Remy smiled a little wider, appreciating her attempt at humor. “Petite, Remy ain’ feelin’ so hungry… He hopes you understand.”

Her smile faded and she looked concerned. “Is… something going on?”

He considered many ways of answering. He didn’t fear being honest with her; just because she told Ororo about Logan, he didn’t instantly distrust her. But at the same time, he didn’t want to burden her with it. Jubilee probably had enough to worry about… “Non, petite. Remy’s jus’ not feelin’ so well.” It wasn’t _exactly_ a lie. He added, “Remy’ll try to be dere fo’ dinner, promise.”

She seemed to brighten at that, and she nodded. “Okay, I’ll leave you alone then.”

“T’ank you,” he said, and soon she was gone. His façade was gone and he fell back on his bed. It was barely past one in the afternoon and he was unbelievably exhausted. It would be so tempting to just go back to sleep, maybe go back to the place where Logan could actually be his, where there was no Jean and no doubt in his mind that Logan would always come back to him no matter what.

He closed his eyes and let his mind wander, thinking about better times with Logan, when Jean was just a girl down the hall who was dating Scott happily. He closed his eyes a little tighter, trying to will those thoughts away. Just him and Logan, just them… that was all he needed.

He needed to calm himself down. He hated thinking about this anymore, hated _himself_ for finding his way back to that one memory. It had been one day, _one day_ since their first kiss, and he was going insane. He shook his head and did the only thing he knew he could do: he sang softly, desperately trying to clear his mind. “I’m still alive but I’m barely breathin’,” he started, murmuring the words under his breath. “Jus’ prayin’ to a god that I don’ believe in…” He sang on from there, his voice rising a little as he continued, losing himself in the rhythm of the song. Jubilee once told him that he had a wonderful voice, but Remy didn’t like performing in front of others. He enjoyed being able to sing in the privacy of his room, for him and himself.

Outside in the kitchen, Jubilee was eating with Ororo and some of the other kids. Out in the main entrance, there was a knock at the door, and Jubilee looked to Ororo, wondering if someone was coming over. Before she could say a word, one of the younger kids had jumped out of his chair and ran out of the kitchen, reaching up and opening the door with some deal of effort. He grinned up at Logan, waving excited at his very confused face. “Hi mister!!”

“Charlie!!” Jubilee pushed her chair back and jogged to the door, grabbing him and pulling him back and looking up at Logan. “Uh… sorry about that…” She knelt down and pointed to the kitchen, pushing him along and telling him to finish his meal. Logan could help laughing a little, raising an eyebrow at her. As soon as she stood in front of him again, she cleared her throat, chancing a look over Logan’s shoulder. “Something you need?”

He gave her a slightly puzzled look before answering. “Yeah, Remy? Is he here?”

“Oh, yeah…” She stepped to the side, inviting him in. “In his room.”

“Thanks.” Logan gave a small nod to Ororo who smiled at him and resumed eating. As he walked back, Jubilee looked out to the truck again, not sure what to think of the girl in the front seat of his truck.

He walked down the hallway and found Remy’s room, reaching for the door knob, but stopping after a moment. Listening carefully, he pulled his hand back and tried to catch the words Remy seemed to be saying… or rather, singing. Logan didn’t have a single clue that Remy could sing… or that well, either. In fact, it was amazing… Logan leant against the wall beside Remy’s room and listened, mesmerized, unwilling to interrupt him. Even though Remy’s voice muffled through the wall, Logan enjoyed it all the same. He could only imagine what it would sound like if he was hearing it without any sort of barrier between them.

When he leaned in close enough, ear almost pressed against the wall, he could more easily make out the words. ‘ _What am I gonna do, when the best part of me was always you… what am I supposed to say, when I’m all choked up that you’re okay…’_ Logan’s brows drew together in thought, wondering why he was singing that song… it couldn’t mean anything though, right? It was just a song, a sad one, but it wasn’t that important. He quickly convinced himself that he was overthinking it, listening again, enjoy the song for what it was.

When Remy’s singing ended, Logan had to force himself out of his thoughts and stand upright again. He wouldn’t mind listening to more, if he were honest with himself. He was good – hell, he was _amazing_ – but if he’d known Remy for a good five or so years and didn’t know he could sing that good? It was obviously private. He felt a small amount of guilt fill him as he realized he’d listened in without Remy’s knowledge. He couldn’t let him know he’d heard, not if he didn’t want to upset Remy.

Waiting a couple of minutes or so outside the door, he knocked lightly on the door, swearing he heard a small sound of surprise from the other side. “Remy?”

Remy jumped, bolting upright and looking at the door. As soon as he heard Logan’s voice, he gasped and immediately wiped at his face, jumping out of bed and trying to find something to use to make his eyes less puffy. He cursed to himself as he dug around for something, _anything_ to use. Eventually he just grabbed a long sleeved shirt and patted his face a little.

There was some shuffling from the other side of the door, and Logan waited, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Don’t even try to play dumb, I can hear you on the other side of the door. What’re you doing?”

“Remy’s…” He patted his face more, checking his reflection every  few seconds, huffing in frustration when nothing improved. “He’s busy! Can you… maybe wait by de door?”

Logan frowned deeply, not sure what he was doing that he’d need a moment. “… Are you, like…” He leaned closer to the door and tried to speak a little lower, his face burning a bit. “Are you… are you ja—”

Instantly Remy turned red and he shouted back, “ _Wait by de door, Logan!”_

Logan flinched back and turned, feeling like he’d already gotten on his bad side. Face still bright red, he swiftly walked towards the door and waited diligently, looking out the window at Jean who was still sat in the truck. She kept looking to the house and Logan checked his phone. He’d already been inside for a little while…

Remy carefully opened the door, and as soon as he saw that the coast was clear, he went across the hall to the bathroom and splashed his face with water. It was instantly refreshing, and as soon as he dried his face with a proper hand towel, he looked much better. Taking a deep breath, he straightened his shirt and made sure he looked alright, walking out to where Logan was stood, smiling for him. “What d’you need, mon ami? An’ _no,_ Remy wasn’ doin’ dat, by de way.” He gave Logan a stern glare, folding his arms across his chest.

Logan’s face went red yet again. “No, no, I know you weren’t…” He looked over to the kids in the kitchen. “Sorry about that.”

Remy rolled his eyes. “You ain’ got an ounce o’ self control.”

He gave him a severely unimpressed look. “Says the compulsive thief.”

“’Ey, Remy chooses who he steals from wit’ much careful consideration.” He waved his hands between them for a moment, as if stopping the conversation right there. “But dat’s beside the point. What do you want?”

“Well, I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out. We’re going to get lunch, then maybe, I dunno, shop.”

Remy paused for a moment. “You know Remy ain’ got no money.”

“Well, it’s fine, we can cover.”

It was only then that Remy realize that when Logan said ‘we’, he was including someone else. A third person. Taking a leap of faith, he asked, “We?”

“You, me, and Jean.”

It took a great amount of willpower not to wince at the sound of her name. Remy feigned consideration for a moment, but shook his head. That was the last thing he wanted: sitting back and watching while Logan and Jean probably fawned all over each other. Maybe even exchanged more kisses… he nearly shuddered at the thought. “Remy don’ wanna take yo’ money.”

Logan snorted uncontrollably. “And that’s stopped you before?”

“Dat’s different. Plus… don’t you two wanna… spend more private time toget’er?”

“How the hell is that different? And c’mon, you’re my best friend, she’s my…” he paused for a moment, thinking for a moment. “… She’s coming along. Plus, you can get to know each other.”

“Remy’s tempted, but he’s gon’ have to say no.”

Logan looked reasonably surprised. Since when did Remy turn down lunch and a day together? “Really?”

“Remy’s got t’ings to do…” He looked over to the kids. “He’s tryin’ to help out ‘Ro a little, make up fo’ last weekend, y’know…” He shrugged, trying not to make it sound like a big deal. Especially since the entire thing was yet another lie.

“Oh, I… yeah, I get it.” Logan looked away and nodded. Something about it seemed a little unlikely, but he wasn’t going to stand there and interrogate him. Deciding to accept it, he finally spoke up again. “Okay, uh… well if you wanna hang out or something, just call.”

“Remy will.” He opened the door for Logan, letting him step out. Logan waved to Remy and then to Ororo and Jubilee (Charlie waved back rather excitedly) and soon he was back in the truck and driving away. Jean’s eyes stayed on Remy the entire time, never leaving his face until they were too far down the road. Remy actually felt a hint of anger at that. What right did she have, looking at him like that?

Pushing it down, he closed the door slowly and turned to go back to his room. He was stopped, however, by Ororo, who at some point had stood and approached him. He stopped and looked at her, their eyes almost level.

“You have nothing to make up for, Remy,” she said. She didn’t talk down to him, she didn’t outright point out his lie. It didn’t change the fact that they both knew it was there.

“Remy knows,” he said simply, staying for a moment before returning to his room again, closing the door softly and turning out all the lights, crawling under the blankets and forcing himself to sleep.

\----------

At school early that week, Logan rummaged through his locker and went through the routine: history book away, math book out, notebooks for other classes, close the locker. Except today, as he closed the locker, someone was standing on the other side.

“Scott.” Logan blinked, surprised, but Jean had warned him. It was just a bit sooner than they’d expected, since Logan didn’t really consider them “official”. Whatever the hell that meant.

“Logan.” Scott said simply. There was a tense, rather awkward silence that followed and Logan shifted his gaze between Scott and some other kids in the hallway.

“Uh… can I help you?”

“You know why I’m here, Logan.”

“Unless there was a staring contest I don’t know about, then no, I really don’t know why you’re here.”

Logan could see Scott’s anger rising, even behind his sunglasses. “You don’t deserve Jean.”

“What, and you do? Last I checked, she left you because you were a colossal dick. And you’re filling the description pretty well right now.” Logan didn’t even let him retort. “She’s interested in me, and I like her. We’re trying things out. So lay off, chill out, take it like a man and move on, alright?” Logan stepped aside to get to class, not wanting to deal with him any longer. But of course, Scott wasn’t through.

“Oh, and some star jock from the football team is gonna treat her right? You’re _known_ for being a complete asshole and utterly ignorant to people’s feelings, Logan. You don’t give two shits about _anyone.”_

Logan growled lowly at that, stopped and turning around to face him again. “I care about people.”

He scoffed. “Yeah? How many friends do you even _have?_ I bet you can’t even name five.”

He bared his teeth, feeling his hands tighten into fists. “It’s not about how many, Scotty, it’s about what they mean to you. Quality, not quantity. Maybe that’ll get through your thick skull and you’ll remember it one day when all those fake friends you’ve got have up and left ya.” He turned around again swiftly and walked down the hall to get to his class, ignoring anything else he could possibly say. There was a reason Jean dumped him. He was arrogant, rude, and jealous. Only speaking to him for a minute or two was annoying enough.

As soon as he got to his next class, he slumped in his seat next to Jean. “Just got a nice visit from Scott.”

She groaned, hiding her face in her hand for a moment. “I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t, it’s fine.” He offered a smile, and Jean returned it after a moment.

“Good… I know he gets like that… he just doesn’t know how to handle… this, y’know?”

Logan felt a little awkward after a moment. “Yeah…” He opened his mouth to ask something, but stopped. Maybe now wasn’t a good time… in a classroom, full of people who were idly chatting. Logan leaned close to Jean, asking quietly, “Jean, uh… what _is ‘_ this’, anyways?”

She blushed bright red, hiding her face behind her hair. She quickly pushed it behind her ear and shrugged, her eyes focused on her notebook. “It’s… well, it’s whatever we want it to be…”

“So… what do _you_ want it to be?”

Again, she blushed. “I… well, I dunno, I mean… after the game…” Her cheeks were redder than ever, and Logan couldn’t help smiling a little. “What about you…?”

“I’m thinking you’re too embarrassed to say it, but… I think we’re kinda thinking the same thing.”

She seemed surprised by his answer when she looked up at him. “Really?”

Logan nodded. “Yeah… so what do you say…?”

She reached across the desk and rested her hand gently over Logan’s, tentative at first, but firm when he didn’t pull away. “I say yes.”

Logan grinned, and she returned it, and judging by the whispers behind them when class was starting and they were sitting with a little distance between them again – hands still held together – he knew that it was finally official, it was finally happening. They were dating, and the first thing that came to mind was that he _had_ to tell Remy.

\----------

After classes were over and the entire school already knew that Jean and Logan were together, Loagn met with Jean after her class and the stopped by his locker to pick up his back, holding hands on the way down to the main entrance of the building. It felt weird, but also good, and Logan didn’t want to let go the entire way. If anything, Logan was sure his heart would just lift out of him at any moment. Jean seemed happy too – her friends had smiled and waved, not stopping her this time, which Logan appreciated. As soon as they made it out front, Jean turned to face him, still blushing, but Logan knew she felt no embarrassment.

“I, uh…” She started, then laughed. “This sounds so weird, but… thank you, for today…”

Logan laughed with her, then squeezed her hand. “You don’t need to thank me for going out with you. It’s not a favor or something.”

“Well yeah, but… y’know…” She grinned and shrugged. “I just wanted to tell you that I’m happy for today. I really am.”

“Me too.” He smiled, and she looked out to her car.

“I’m sorry I can’t be at your practice today… My parents need me, I guess… it’s a long story.”

“Don’t worry about it, there’s plenty more to go to. You don’t have to go to all of them.”

“Thanks for understanding…” She smiled appreciatively, then something caught the corner of her eye. Over Logan’s shoulder, she spotted Remy approaching. For a flicker of a moment, they made eye contact, but she broke it to look back at Logan. “So, I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah.” He smiled, then leaned down and kissed her, his hand holding tightly to hers. A few paces away, Remy had stopped and was watching the scene unfold. He’d heard the rumors. He’d heard what had happened in Logan’s class. He’d only prayed to god that they were wrong. Turned out, you can’t win them all, or in Remy’s case, any.

Logan and Jean pulled apart a few seconds later and she finally let go, waving goodbye and tossing her red hair over her shoulder. Remy wondered if there was a way he could chop it all off and throw it all away. His thoughts were driven away as soon as Logan turned and happened to see Remy, seeming so pleasantly surprised, so happy. Remy wondered if he’d ever made Logan that happy before, or even if he could.

“So…” Remy started, shoving his hands into his pockets, smirking up at Logan. “De rumors are true, non?”

“Rumors?” Logan asked, then looked back at Jean. “Oh, you mean…”

“Oui, dat.” Remy’s smirk faltered a little, but he took a subtly deep breath, revitalizing it.

“Yeah, uh… that’s true.” He looked back at Remy, his grin lopsided. Remy smiled back at him, forcing with all of his willpower to make it seem honest. Logan couldn’t know hot it was tearing him up inside, knowing that Jean would have what he couldn’t. There wasn’t a chance in hell that Logan would understand if he were to ever admit it to him (and Remy felt like that would _never_ happen, not at this point).

“Good fo’ you. Finally… finally got some guts, eh?”

“Guess so… but hey, sooner than you, eh?” He punched Remy’s shoulder lightly, walking back inside the school to head to practice.

“Sooner dan Remy?” He scoffed softly. “You t’ink dis Cajun wants to be tied down? ‘Specially to someone wit’ as much baggage as Jean Grey?”

Logan frowned. “Hey, that ain’t funny anymore.”

“What, Remy was allowed to make jokes in de past but now dat yo’… an item, Remy can’ say not’in’?”

“No, so can it.” Logan readjusted his bag over his shoulder.

“Fine, fine…” Remy shrugged. “He jus’ heard about what happened between you an’ Scotty in de hall.”

“That was just Scott being a jealous dick. He knows he fucked up with Jean, and all he’s been doing now is trying to win her back. Ever since we started seeing each other, he’s been talking to her whenever he can. He sent flowers too. Almost creepy.”

Remy shrugged again. “Ain’ not’in’ wrong wit’ second chances…” For a moment, he couldn’t believe he was vouching for Scott Summers – after all, he only seemed to look down his nose at Remy. Not to mention, after hearing about what he’d said to Logan in the hallway, he’d nearly stepped out of class to find him and punch him for that. He knew he’d have only made things worse, and luckily for Scott, Remy didn’t see him in the hallway between fourth and fifth period.

“Yeah, well he’s had one too many,” Logan said stubbornly. “I told Jean she shouldn’t let this guy step all over her and control her. I think she agreed with me there. It’s just not right.” He looked at Remy and asked, “You think that ass deserves another chance?”

Remy tensed at the sudden question, but he cleared his throat and collected himself. “Well, Remy don’ know de whole story… guessin’ you know more dan he does.” He stopped in front of the door to the locker rooms. “Jus’… well, y’know Remy. He t’inks everyone deserves some sort o’ redemption. O’, well… most people.”

Logan stopped in front of him and smiled softly. He knew what Remy was referring to, and he knew his heart was in the right place. “I know. Just that this asshole has done enough. I’m not gonna let him do that again.”

Remy knew that tone of voice, and he knew what it meant. How long had he and Jean known each other anyways? A few weeks? Of course they’d known who the other was, they’d talked only when they had to, but suddenly Logan had gone from denying she was even interested in him to becoming protective over her. It made Remy’s stomach churn uncomfortably and made his heart ache even more than before. Already he felt pushed aside, half-forgotten even. Had Remy even been standing outside, would Logan have waited for him or just walked inside and gone straight to practice? Had Remy even shown up to school today, would Logan even care anymore? Remy didn’t find it hard to imagine that he would be completely wrapped up in his new relationship, in Jean, that he wouldn’t have realized anything was amiss until he saw Remy again.

Remy lifted his hands in mock surrender, stepping back. “Don’ start growlin’ at Remy, Logan, just go to practice, alrigh’? Let de whole beast out dere.” He smiled and waved, dropping the entire act the moment his back was turned to Logan. He quickly made his way out the door and pulled his coat close, taking in a deep breath. Jean wouldn’t be here… that was what mattered. It was just him and Logan, in some sense. _Just pretend like it’s old times,_ he told himself.

So, he did just that: he sat on the bleachers and waited, sitting by himself in the cold and pulling out his homework. He didn’t have any math or history of any kind; just some English and art assignments to do. Not quite feeling like writing another paper just yet, he vouched for the easier option and pulled out his sketchbook, opening it to the assignment he’d written down.

Two pages of sketches. Remy groaned. He was alright at drawing, but he really didn’t like doing it because he had to. Still, it wouldn’t be too hard to fill up the pages in an hour or so. Pulling out a pencil and setting the book on his lap, he set to work, drawing whatever came to mind. He started simple: a tree, a bird, ever the corner of a building. His ideas were quickly fading, and he wondered what he could do instead that would make his assignment move along that much faster.

As soon as the whistle blew, an idea struck him. He gathered his things and moved down to the very first bleacher, setting the pencil against the page and waiting. The team got into their positions and the quarterback shouted a command, and soon the play was in motion. Remy watched intently, having never been more focused on a game of football in his entire life. His eyes caught Logan’s jersey and he began sketching furiously, drawing out a rough shape in the span of another play. It wasn’t very legible, but Remy knew what it was, and he continued right on from there.

He started another sketch, this time adding a little more detail, almost enjoying what he was doing; there was more action this time, but Remy still wasn’t sure about some of the details to define everything in the sketch. As soon as that one was finished, he did another pose, and another, and within the half hour, Remy had an entire page filled, edge to edge. He looked it over and was impressed with his work. Sure it was a little messy in places, but when were sketches ever as pretty as the final result?

He immediately flipped to the next page and watched Logan a little longer, drawing furiously, enjoying himself greatly while doing so. This time however he challenged himself to be more exact, adding shading and some finder points, like the dark shades of the shoes and the number and adding small designs from the sides of the helmets. He had to refrain from drawing only Logan however; it’d be pretty obvious if he only drew the same player, #15, over and over and over again. He added in a few others, filling up the page in about another hour or so, pulling back and stretching up to alleviate the strain in his spine.

He flipped between the pages now and again, adding shades and smiling to himself. At the very least, he could have these drawings. Simple memories of Logan’s football career in high school, their tradition of Friday night games... well, up until last week. The thought instantly killed his mood, and his mind, as if against him, reminded him of the kiss afternoon as well. Suddenly he felt in no mood to draw, and he closed the sketchbook and set it aside. Pulling his knees close, he simply watched Logan, resting his chin on his arms which were folded over his knees. He stayed just like that for the remainder of the practice, his mind still swimming over what would happen. He hated thinking about the future too much, about what his life would be and where he would end up, but when it concerned Logan, what else did he have? What else was there if Logan wasn’t around to hang out with, to play video games with, to go see movies and eat oversized cheeseburgers with two sides of fries with? Remy knew the answer, and it scared him more than he thought it would.

As soon as practice ended, Remy grabbed his bag and lifted it over his shoulder, going straight to the truck instead of waiting by the gate. Logan would figure out where he was eventually, and he’d come out as soon as he’d changed. When he did, he found Remy leaning against the hood of his car as always, arms folded and posture relaxed as usual. He didn’t think much of it, and as soon as he got to the truck, he unlocked it and let Remy in, starting the engine. “Back home?”

Remy looked at him. “What about Jean?”

Logan shrugged a little. “I’ve got time, I’ve gotta shower and change, but that’s about a half hour or so…”

“Time which you’ll be spendin’ cleanin’ up an’ getting’ dressed fo’ yo’ girl.” He shrugged. “Y’may as well take Remy home, Logan.”

“Yeah, but I still need my fashion designer, don’t I?”

Remy couldn’t help smiling at that. “Oui, you _are_ a bit hopeless wit’out dis Cajun…”

“That’s right. So you’re comin’ back with me and helping me get ready for the date.”

Remy nodded slowly, looking out the window. “Oui, dat’s what Remy’s dere fo’…”

Logan smiled and drove them home, not making much more conversation beyond that. Remy didn’t mind it so much; he worried too much that the conversation would turn to Logan and Jean’s date again, and he didn’t want to talk about that at all. Thankfully the silence was short-lived, and Logan pulled into his driveway a few minutes later and turned off the engine, letting them out. Remy went inside and dropped his bag unceremoniously on the couch, walking to the fridge and grabbing a soda while Logan headed for the bathroom. Remy headed straight for Logan’s bedroom and sat near the head of the bed, stretching his legs in front of him and sitting quietly, looking around the room. Logan had a few posters were and there, not too many possessions. On his bedside table there was a photo frame with a picture of Logan and his parents. Logan had to be only ten or so, but his hair was just as wild then as it was now. Remy smiled, picking up the photograph and inspecting it closely.

Remy had known Logan’s parents, but not nearly long enough. When Logan and Remy had first met in grade school, Remy was barely skin and bones, taunted constantly by the boys in the higher grades than he was for being a foster child. Back then, Remy didn’t understand why they thought it was funny, and apparently, the fierce boy from his grade who was larger than most didn’t find it that funny either. Logan had punched the boy right in the nose, giving him a bloody nose and sending him to the nurse. Of course, Logan was sent home after that, but Logan refused to leave without Remy too. Even for being only nine, he somehow knew how bad it could be, being the odd one out, being left alone after a boy was hurt on his behalf. So Remy went back with him (his current foster mother didn’t seem to care) and with a trembling frame and thin hands that gripped at Logan’s sleeve, he officially met Logan’s mother and father, and things changed very drastically for him.

They spent as much time together as possible at school, they sat next to each other in class, and when they good, they went back to Logan’s house. Logan hadn’t brought Remy over as often as he did now, but it was still frequent. At least three days of the week were spent with him, hanging out, working on homework, playing video games for hours on end. Remy laughed to himself, realizing that things hadn’t changed much. Still, Logan’s mother had been good to Remy, treating him almost like a second son. She cut his hair and got him some nicer clothes, gave them snacks and made Remy always feel welcome. Logan’s father on the other hand was a more traditional man: he took them out camping on the weekends and go-kart racing and even fishing (thought they had to get up at four in the morning and ended up sleeping in the car after only an hour of fishing). They supported him and encouraged him and tried to improve his life as much as they could. They were Logan’s parents, but they were as much of Remy’s parents too.

Nevertheless, when they’d received the news about what had happened to his parents, Remy was heartbroken, but Logan was devastated. He fell into a deep depression, and it was the worst Remy had ever seen him, even to this day. They were at home, waiting for them to get back from their short trip to the main city, and instead of Logan’s mom and dad walking in and announcing dinner or coming inside to talk about the story of their day, they got a knock on the door from the cops, and they knew something terrible had happened. Remy hadn’t left the house for nearly two weeks after that. He spent night after night comforting Logan, staying with him and helping him along. He bought their groceries and cleaned the house when Logan would sleep during the day, did his laundry and got him to eat his meals with him. It was the time where Remy took up a hand at cooking, and though he didn’t do it often, Logan always told him he was good at it.

He sighed and looked at the picture for a while longer, wishing he could see them again. He wondered what his mother and father would think of him – of them – now. He wanted them back so desperately sometimes. They were the closest thing to a true family that Remy ever had.

Remy heard someone clear their throat, and he instantly looked up, jumping a little. Logan, leaning against the door in a loose pair of jeans and a tank, looked at him with a somber expression. He knew what he was holding and he soon walked around the bed and joined him by crawling on beside him, sitting back against the headboard, his shoulder brushing against Remy’s as he got comfortable. He didn’t say anything, silently reaching out for the frame and taking it, holding it carefully and looking down at it.

“I look at this almost every day.” Logan said. “They always wanted me to do my best… I try to do that, for them.” Logan sighed softly, then asked, “Do you think they’d like her…?”

Remy smiled softly, his heart hurting inside. “Dey’d love her, Logan. Dey really would…”

Logan smiled, though it was half-hearted. “I think so too… After all, it’d probably be a better first impression than they had of you.”

Even at the insult, Remy couldn’t help but laugh. “What, a boy wit’ ripped up jeans, choppy hair an’ barely any fat on his body?”

“Yeah.” Logan grinned, leaning against Remy a little. “Mom thought you were gonna pass out at any moment. She was practically giving you a five course meal for a week after I first brought you over.”

“Remy wasn’ complainin’ t’ough. Yo’ mama’s cookin’ was amazin’. Plus, Remy wasn’ gon’ say no to some free food, eit’er.”

“Is that where the habit started?” Logan asked teasingly, bumping his shoulder against Remy’s and grinning at him. “That’s why you have no problem with stealin’ all of my food?”

Remy shrugged, not bearing an ounce of shame. “Maybe. But you keep offerin’, so Remy ain’ gonnna stop takin’.”

“Shoulda known.” Logan looked down at the picture, sighing to himself softly. “I miss ‘em.”

Remy shifted a little bit, leaning against him more, tilting his head towards Logan’s. “Remy does too.”

“They were your parents as much as they were mine.” Logan said, and Remy nodded.

“Dey were de only real family Remy had,” he said in a softer voice, his heart sinking a little. Of course he had Ororo, and she was a wonderful woman, Remy would never deny it… but Logan’s parents did so much for him, they loved him beyond words could describe… Remy missed their hugs more than anything.

“Hey,” Logan said softly, turning to face him a little. “You’ve still got me, right?”

Remy looked up at him, meeting his gaze for a number of seconds. He had Logan… for now, at least. “Oui,” he said, putting on a small smile. “’Course he does.”

They looked at each other for a few moments, and Remy felt himself inching closer, desperately trying to make Logan his but at the same time know that it was wrong, _so_ wrong, and he couldn’t. For once though, he forced Jean out of his mind entirely, not using that excuse. Logan said it himself, Remy had Logan… Logan was his. And he could take what was his, right…?

He felt an arm slide around the base of his spine and he shivered at it, moving a little closer and dropping his gaze to Logan’s lips. He swore they were close, closer than they’d probably ever been, and Remy felt Logan’s breath fan over his cheek and he closed his eyes, praying that this wasn’t a dream.

Without so much as a word, Logan turned and set the picture down, patting Remy’s leg. “C’mon, you’ve got a job to do. Time to pick out whatever I’m wearing.”

Remy opened his eyes and pulled back slowly, nodding and clearing his throat. “Sure t’ing, Logan.” Logan’s arm removed itself from him – a hug, _that’s all it was_ , a simple hug – and he stood from the bed, leaving Remy for a moment. Remy took the picture and before setting it down, he looked at it for a moment. His eyes found Logan’s mother, and in that moment he desperately wished she was there. “What would you have Remy do…?” he asked under his breath, closing his eyes and shaking his head before setting the frame back.

Logan was pulling out some of his nicer jeans and plain shirts, including some of the ones Remy bought him. Remy stood from the bed and joined him, looking down at the selection. “What’s de occasion?”

“Just hanging out. Jean said we’d probably go to the mall. There aren’t any good movies out, so we’re gonna have dinner after a few hours.”

Remy reached over and pushed aside the button down shirts. “Too fo’mal.” He looked over the jeans, picking a darker, more fitted pair, then a light grey shirt to go along with it. “Wear a jacket over dat. It’s cold out.”

Logan looked over Remy’ decision and smiled. “Alright, looks good.”

“’Course it does, Remy picked it.” He sat back down on the bed, raising an eyebrow at him. “Dat’s why you hired Remy, non? To make de fashion choices dat you can’?”

“Whatever.” Logan grabbed the shirt and pulled off the tank, and Remy had to refrain from choking. He hadn’t realized that Logan would just strip, right there. It was only his shirt, but... Remy felt his face go bright red and he instantly picked up anything he could find. The first thing he grabbed was a magazine, and he opened it to a random page and started reading.

… Of course, that didn’t stop his eyes from wandering a little.

As Logan shook out the shirt and put his arms through it, Remy looked over, catching sight of his torso. And _god damn_ was football a wonderful thing. He swallowed thickly, a little envious of how strong he looked and how toned his muscles were, but more so bitter that he couldn’t do anything about Logan standing right there, practically shirtless, his own hands begging just to reach out and just _indulge_.

When Logan’s shirt was back on, Remy returned his gaze to the magazine.

“Uh…”

Remy looked up. “Oui?”

Logan scratched the back of his head. “You gonna stay there?”

“… You kickin’ Remy to de floo’?”

“Well, no, but… I need to change.”

Remy nodded slowly. “Go nuts, mon ami, Remy ain’ stopping you.” No, he certainly wasn’t.

“I’m changing my jeans.”

“An’ Remy’s proud o’ you fo’ managin’ a feat such as dat.”

He groaned. “Remy, I’m being serious…”

Remy lowered the magazine with a huff. “Remy can’ even figure out what de hell yo’ point is, so he really don’ know what yo’ tryin’ to be serious about in de firs’ place.”

“I need to change!”

“So change, Remy don’t give a flyin’ fuck!”

“Can you _leave?!_ ”

Remy stared at him for a long time; he knew he should probably feel offended or hurt, but he smirked before he could stop himself and asked in a light voice, “Oh, Logan, are you shy…?”

“Wha—no! Jesus, Remy, I’m just asking for a little privacy!!”

“Oh don’ worry, Remy won’ look.” He propped himself on the bed with his magazine, his legs crossed at the ankle. As Logan glared at him, Remy lowered the magazine just enough so his eyes show, and he raised an eyebrow at him.

“Eyes down!”

Remy rolled his eyes and dropped the magazine in his lap, sighing frustratedly. “Logan, please, it ain’ like Remy’s never seen one befo’.”

Logan growled lowly. “You either lift that magazine or I drag you out to the front porch and lock you out.”

His jaw dropped a little. “Lock de door? _Really,_ Logan? It’s like you don’ know Remy at all!!”

“For fuck’s sake—”

Remy threw his hands up in surrender. “Alrigh’, alrigh’, Remy’s liftin’ de magazine!” He lifted it, effectively hiding his entire face behind its pages. He heard Logan shuffling around, tripping once and bumping into something with a loud curse, and then finally put the belt on. “No broken bones, Logan?”

“Shut up,” he muttered. “You can lower the damn magazine now.”

Remy closed it and tossed it aside without another comment, then looked over Logan, taking in his appearance. Remy had _definitely_ done well. He nodded in approval, standing from the bed and approaching Logan, gesturing for him to turn around for him. Logan did so with a groan and turned, showing Remy everything. As soon as Remy was satisfied, he patted Logan’s shoulder and slipped past him, heading back out into the kitchen. “So, now dat yo’ all ready, you kickin’ Remy back to ‘Ro’s?”

“Guess so, if that’s how you’re gonna put it.” Logan had grabbed a jacket and was following him put, stuffing his keys in his pocket and checking to make sure he had cash in his wallet.

“Gon’ steal one mo’ t’ing, if you don’ mind,” Remy said idly, opening the fridge and fishing through it to grab some leftover pizza and a half sandwich.

“Go nuts, Rem.” Seeing he had enough cash, he stuffed his wallet in his pocket and zipped up his jacket, feeling the nerves build again. They weren’t as bad as they used to be when he and Jean had first hung out together, but they were still significant. Remy seemed to catch his nervousness, since as he passed by him he rested a hand on his back for a moment and smiled at him.

“Don’ be so nervous, mon ami. Yo’ style will make up fo’ whatever blubberin’ mistakes you make.” He patted him twice and slipped out of his reach before Logan could smack him, stuffing his soon-to-be dinner in his bag. “Now take dis Cajun home so he can go be bored fo’ de next six hours.”

Logan smiled and led them out the door, locking the house behind them and unlocking the truck to let them in. It was a short drive back to Remy’s as usual, most of the time spent with Remy guilting Logan about going on a date while Remy had no Xbox to play and no free food sitting in his fridge that he could take whenever he wanted. Logan paid him barely any mind, knowing he’d survive just fine without him. As they pulled up, Remy stepped out and pointed at Logan, his eyes narrowed. “Don’ make dis a daily t’ing, Logan.”

He frowned. “What?”

“Dis datin’ shit. Yo’ gon’ make time fo’ Remy, non?”

“I’ve _always_ got time for you.”

Remy lowered his hand. “Keep dat in mind.”

“Remy…” he sighed. “There hasn’t been a week since we were about thirteen that I haven’t had you over at _least_ once. That ain’t gonna change, okay? Things will still be the same. I promise.”

He looked at him for a few moments, then smiled. It was more to himself though; Logan never broke his promises, not to Remy. “… Fine.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Oui, oui, go have fun on yo’ date.” He waved Logan off, moving to close the door.

“Hey, y’know this may not be a bad thing,” he called.

His head tilted sideways, unsure what he meant. “What’s dat s’posed to mean?”

“Well, after about five years straight of constant company, maybe a little break is good, huh?” Logan was grinning, but Remy didn’t see it as a joke. Did he honestly believe that? Was he growing tired of Remy being around all the time? Knowing Logan was expecting a reaction, Remy put on a quick grin and rolled his eyes.

“Fuck you, Logan,” and for an added measure, he flipped him off, which Logan laughed at.

“Seeya, Remy.”

“Later.” Remy closed the door and stepped back, turning and slowly walking towards the house as Logan drove away. Maybe Logan really wanted time apart, but he just didn’t know how to say so.  Remy knew he’d need time for Jean, but was he maybe just moving on altogether? Remy looked back to the road Logan had driven down, his stomach in knots. If Remy were a good friend, he would respect his wish… if Logan didn’t want Remy around as much, Remy simply wouldn’t be around. He’d let him and Jean get closer, let their relationship thrive and give up his only friend for the sake of his happiness over his own.

So, as always, Remy was going to be the best friend he could be.

\----------

It was Friday again.

Spirit gear was worn. Kids were shouting at Logan to kick some ass. They whistled and catcalled when he and Jean walked together hand in hand.

Friday was now the most painful day of the week for Remy.

He considered simply ditching the rest of the day at lunch, but he had just one more class with Logan and he wouldn’t see Jean for most of it anyways. It was a home game too, and Logan would normally do a light practice, take Remy back to his place, and relax for the next few hours before the game. That was the tradition. That was the way things had always been.

Of course, nothing always stayed the same.

Remy proceeded through the rest of his day, zoning out for most of his fourth and fifth period, paying a little attention in sixth, but not nearly enough to actually engage in the class. When the last bell rang, he was already walking out the door, thanking whatever higher power there was that he was out of that hell. He jogged down the stairs and got out the main entrance of the school, standing next to the bench, watching out for Logan and waiting for him.

And he waited for quite a while.

Nearly fifteen minutes went by and the crowd out from had thinned out to no more than a few kids waiting to be picked up. Remy stood and frowned, walking back inside the school. It was already five minutes before practice… but where was Logan?

Deciding it’d be easier to wait on the bleachers and catch him as he came out on the field (he really didn’t want to go in the guy’s locker room for a number of reasons), he went out the side of the school and walked out towards the field. And who else would be in the stands than Jean Grey. She’d been to the last two practices, watching Logan play and doing homework here and there. She and Remy didn’t exchange much conversation when they sat alone together. Mostly because there wasn’t much to say, but also because Jean was the last person in the world that Remy would want to talk to.

He walked up the bleachers and reluctantly sat beside Jean, keeping a little distance between them. They exchanged a short, forced smile and sat in silence. The players came out o the field shortly after, Logan in the midst of them. Remy wasn’t exactly thrilled to see him there; after all, why hadn’t he told Remy he’d just gone straight to the locker rooms? They always met out front…

“So,” Jean asked a few minutes into practice, “are you coming to the game?”

Remy frowned, a bit thrown by the question. “… Remy always goes to Logan’s games.”

“Oh okay,” she replied, grinning and looking back at the field. Occasionally Remy wished she’d talk like a normal human being and not some high-on-happiness toddler who was always so cheery.

His mind was however swamped by her question. They drove to the game together last week… why would this be any different? Logan always drove him, no matter what. Otherwise, he had no way of getting there, not unless he wanted to walk in the dark for about five miles each way. He turned to look at Jean again. “Why’re you askin’, anyways?”

“Oh, just wondering.” She said with a smile. “Logan and I are going out to dinner before, so we may be cutting it close.” After a moment, Jean looked at him and asked, “He didn’t tell you?”

Remy wanted nothing more thatn to slap that overly-sweet smile off her face. “Non, must’ve slipped his mind.”

Jean nodded, giggling gently. “Yeah, sometimes he forgets those things. We made the plans two days ago, anyways. But don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll have time to pick you up on the way back.”

Remy smiled, but he was sure both he and Jean knew it was fake. The conversation died right then and Remy rested his elbows on his knees as he watched the practice, glad to himself that they didn’t have to stay too long. Logan would get him… of course he would. They’d go to the game and they’d order pizza and play Xbox until the late hours of the night and crash on the couch after putting in a movie. That was how it had always been, and Logan promised, he _promised_ things wouldn’t change.

When practice wrapped up, Logan had both Jean and Remy in his car, Remy in the back and Jean in the front passenger seat. Remy told Logan he could just take him home so he could let Logan and Jean go back to his while he got ready. When Logan dropped him off, he stalked inside the house and kicked off his shoes by the door, walking straight into his room. He closed his door a bit louder than he’d intended to, but he honestly didn’t care. His bag was tossed unceremoniously on the bed and he grabbed a pencil from his small desk and climbed on the bed to work on his homework for the time being. He glanced at the clock. Only about two hours until the game. That was plenty of time to eat dinner, wasn’t it? Remy thought so, but he had no doubt Jean better-than-you Grey would talk incessantly the whole time. That’d be about an hour’s worth of wasted time, if Remy were to guess.

He reached into his bag and pulled out his English homework, free writing about anything and everything that came to his mind. He erased the few curse words that came out and tried to make it sound less angry, but he figured he’d have more time over the weekend to fix it up. After all, Logan would be busy, wouldn’t he? There wouldn’t be time to waste on Remy anymore.

He worked through his paper and set it aside after an hour, pulling out a few other notebooks and studying in pure silence. Occasionally some of the kids came racing by the room and he looked up, but it was only a temporary distraction. Only another ten minutes or so before Logan would normally stop by. He decided he could get ready in that amount of time, so he put his books away and hopped out of bed, pulling on a longer sleeved shirt and a warm jacket as well, grabbing a scarf and tying it close to he knew he’d be warm the whole night. He walked out into the main area and looked out the window. Not sign of Logan yet. There was still time, of course, so Remy leaned against the wall in a spot he could have a clear sight of the street outside.

Five minutes later, three minutes late for Logan to be picking him up, the phone rang.

Jubilee got to the phone first and answered, saying something to whoever was on the line and walking out into the main room.

Remy looked down at her curiously. “You lookin’ fo’ ‘Ro?”

Jubilee shook her head and held the phone out to him.

Of course.

Remy took it slowly and swallowed, looking at Jubilee before pulling his scarf off and walking back into his room. “Hello?”

“Remy?” It was Logan, and he clearly sounded like he was in a rush.

“Dis is. Where’re you at?”

“On our way to the game. We _completely_ lost track of time, one minute it was just going on four thirty, and the next it was ten after six, and we literally had to race out of there to get to the school.”

Jubilee watched as Remy slipped into his room and closed the door behind him gently, removing the jacket one sleeve at a time. “So yo’ unable to pick up Remy den?”

“I… yeah, I can’t… Remy, I’m so sorry, I didn’t—”

“Non, no need to apologize, it ain’ yo’ fault.” Remy dropped the jacket and the scarf in front of the door to the closet. He forced out a soft laugh. “Y’know, Remy don’ even like football anyways.”

On the other end of the line, Logan was laughing. “Yeah, I guess so. Are you sure it’s okay…? I mean, Jean could take my truck and pick you up, or I could get someone to—”

“Logan, please. It’s fine. You don’ gotta send a chauffer fo’ Remy.” He sat on his bed, biting his lower lip as hard as he possibly could to keep his voice level.

“But that’d be your style, right?”

Remy smiled bitterly. “Dat it would, Logan. Dat it would.” Remy lowered the phone for a momnt, taking a long, deep breath. He lifted it again, ignoring the way his hands shook. “Give ‘em hell, Logan.”

“I will. I’m sorry, again… I’ll see you around?”

“Aroun’, oui. Bye, Logan.”

“Bye, Remy.”

Remy hung up the phone, listening to the silence in the room for a good minute. His gaze was entirely unfocused, his heart beating at an irregular pace. His breaths were becoming more ragged by the second, and before he could stop himself, he threw the phone as hard as he possibly could into his coat and scarf on the floor and slumped against the head of the bed as he broke down in tears. 


	5. Chapter 5

Logan was getting frustrated. And when Logan was frustrated, as Remy had once said, he was damn near intolerable to be _close_ to, no less talk to and interact with.

Jean had noticed his mood change – after all, it was hard to ignore. Logan wasn’t blind; she was a little more distant and much less talkative than usual. However, he knew he couldn’t just let it go. Remy had been avoiding him like the plague, and he hadn’t given a single damn clue as to why. At first, he wondered if it was about Friday; maybe it wasn’t so much the game that bothered Remy, but their tradition. He knew it had been dashed the moment Remy said he wouldn’t go. But now that it had been five days since he’d even _spoken_ to Remy, Logan had a hunch that it was something else.

When he went home that day from practice, as soon as he walked into his house and dropped his backpack on his bed, he picked up his phone and dialed for Remy’s house. The phone rang a few times but soon someone answered; someone that wasn’t Remy.

“Hello?”

Logan inwardly groaned. “Hey, it’s Logan… is Remy there?”

Jubilee stepped out into the main room of the house, looking over to Remy’s door. The moment they’d come home, Remy had gone into his room without a single word. And now, three hours later, Remy’s door was still closed with no light coming from underneath it. “Uh… he’s not available at the moment. Can I take a message for him?”

Logan sighed, rubbing his face tiredly. “Yeah, can you tell him that I called and I want him to come over today? It’s important, and I want to see him.”

Jubilee lowered the phone enough to let out a slow breath without Logan hearing. Somehow she knew things were getting worse for Remy. Ever since the day he’d confessed to Jubilee how he felt for Logan, things had spiraled downward for him. She’d noticed how his moods were worse and how he could be silent for almost an entire day. When he came home (which in itself was a bad sign), he barely said a word to her of Ororo. He still helped out around the house, but he looked distant and he could barely manage a smile. The younger kids didn’t notice it, but Jubilee could see it as clear as day.

She lifted the phone again, saying, “Would you pick him up?”

“Yeah, I could do that.”

“Here, I’ll call you back in a bit. Bye, Logan.”

He smiled softly. “Bye, Jubilee.” He set down the phone and took in a deep breath. He tensed only briefly when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Any luck?” Jean asked.

“Maybe.” He shrugged. “We’ll see.”

Back at Remy’s place, Jubilee had put the phone down and made her way over to Remy’s room, standing in front of the door. She wasn’t even sure what to say or how to approach him about it. The last thing she wanted to do was upset him again. Slowly, she raised her hand and knocked gently. “Remy…?”

In the room, Remy had looked over his shoulder slowly, eyebrows drawn together in confusion. Clearing his throat, he asked, “Y’ need somet’in’, petite?”

She opened the door carefully and stepped inside the dark room, looking around awkwardly. Remy had sat upright and reached towards the bedside table, turning on a lamp. It was a low light, but for Jubilee, it was a vast improvement. “Uh, I got a call… from Logan.”

Remy’s eyes lowered to the sheets on the bed and he drew his knees up. “Everyt’in’ okay?”

“Didn’t really sound like it… He said it was important, that he wanted you to come over.”

Remy sighed softly. “Petite, Remy don’… he don’ know…”

Quietly, she stepped forward and crawled onto the far end of the bed, sitting cross-legged in front of him. She wrapped her hands around her ankles to give them something to do, her eyes searching his expression. “Things aren’t better, are they...?”

Remy laughed, though it was soft, and his heart wasn’t in it. “Is Remy dat obvious, petite?”

“Even if I didn’t know what you’d told me, I’d know something was wrong. I want to _help_ , Remy, and if that’s anything from talking to you to getting pizza for ourselves on some random night, I’ll do it. I just wanna see you smile again, Remy, and it seems like that never happens anymore.”

Remy wrapped his arms around his knees and he nodded. “Remy knows he can talk to you. He knows yo’ dere.”

She knew it should have comforted her, but her heart was still heavy. “You don’t have to do this alone.”

Remy smiled again, but this time a tear fell down his cheek, and Jubilee’s heart nearly broke. He wiped it away quickly, still smiling. “Chere, dere are t’ings dat you jus’ have to do alone. Remy don’ wanna drag you down in his struggles. He’s a big boy, he can take care o’ himself. But befo’ himself, Remy always looks out fo’ his friends. If Logan needs him, den so be it. Remy will care fo’ Logan first before himself.”

“No,” she said quickly. “No, I should’ve told him to look in the mirror, told him to take a hike and maybe figure out that you need him as much as he needs you right now!” Her hands balled into fists. “How can’t he see how hard this is for you?!”

“Because he don’ know, chere. He don’ know what you know, and he’s got his own girl to worry about.” He wiped the back of his hand over his wet cheek, looking down at it for a moment. “Remy needs to care fo’ his friend, no matter de cost.”

Feeling tears sting at her own eyes, Jubilee uncrossed her legs and moved forward on the bed, and Remy unwrapped his arms from his knees. He drew her into the hug he saw coming a mile away, and he buried his nose into her hair, his body shaking lightly as he let his pain flow a bit easier now. Jubilee’s arms encircled him and he couldn’t help but wish it were Logan’s arms around him, wish that he realized what he was doing, whether he meant it or not.

“I wish you didn’t have to go through this, Remy…” Jubilee said into his shirt, now slightly wet with her tears.

Remy kissed her hair, stroking a hand through it comfortingly. “Remy only wishes dat you don’ ever have to watch de person you—” He swallowed thickly, and even without finishing she sentence, they both knew what he really meant. “… Dat you never have to see de person you care most fo’ fall in love wit’ someone else.”

Jubilee nodded, not replying. She stayed close with him for a long time, both of them losing track of the minutes that passed. Remy felt a little better after she pulled away eventually, knowing that Jubilee would be there for him for whatever he needed. She smiled up at him through her tearstained face, and Remy took her chin in his hand, kissing both of her cheeks. “T’ank you, petite.”

“Don’t need to, Remy.” She hugged him again, this one much briefer and lighter in a way than the last. When she pulled away, she took a deep breath. “Don’t tell anyone I got all weepy on you, now…”

Remy laughed, sniffling. “Wouldn’ dream o’ it. You’d kick Remy’s ass, after all.”

She laughed back, cross-legged once more. “You’re right, I would. Remy LeBeau, getting his ass handed to him by a girl three years younger than him. Can’t risk your rep, now can you?”

“Non, can’ do dat.” He slowly got off the bed and stood, blowing out a long breath. “Can you do Remy a favor an’ call Logan back…? Remy’ll be ready in a few minutes.”

Jubilee’s smile faded. “Why are you going over there?”

“If Logan needs him, Remy’ll be dere. It’s what friends do.”

Her shoulders slumped. “Remy, why do you do so much for him? He doesn’t go out of his way to make sure you’re okay. He doesn’t see what you’re going through. Best friends aren’t so blind to that!”

Remy grabbed his coat, pulling it on. As soon as he’d straightened it out, he smiled at her. “Remy does it ‘cause… well, put it plainly, he loves him. An’ Remy’ll do anyt’in’ fo de one he loves mo’ dan life itself.” He straightened out his hair a little and gesture to the door with his head. “C’mon. Let’s get outta here, an’ let Remy get himself all sorted an’ presentable.”

She smiled weakly back at him, getting out of the bed and walking out of Remy’s room first. She still felt conflicted, not sure Remy really knew what he was talking about. Of course he loved him, it was plain for her to see, but she didn’t think he should just toss aside his own needs for Logan. As much as she hated thinking it, there was a chance Logan would never return his affection and never truly appreciate what he sacrificed for him. At least, not while he was with Jean.

While Jubilee called Logan back, Remy splashed some water on his face and tried to make the knot in his stomach go away. He told himself again and again that this was what he wanted. He’d always want to see Logan, more than anything, but having to be near him, unable to do anything or tell him what was really going on was becoming harder and harder each day. He could lie easily and get out of almost any situation, but when it came to Logan, it wasn’t so simple.

By the time he’d cleaned himself up and gotten on some proper shoes, Logan had pulled up and walked to the door. Remy opened it, forcing Jubilee back and ignoring her as she stalked back to her room, a glare set on her face. As soon as he saw Logan, just him and no one in the car, Remy felt instant relief.

Logan’s smile was brief. “Hey, you ready?”

Remy nodded. “Oui.” He followed him out to the car, glad to feel that Logan had it all warmed up. Even the seat felt warm, which was a wonderful feeling. However, the good feelings vanished a little when Logan didn’t pull away from his house, and the silence became more awkward with each passing moment. When Remy looked over at Logan, he knew he had something to say. _He had better,_ Remy couldn’t help thinking, but he tried to push the thoughts back to the moment.

“Look, I dunno if you meant it or not, but… You’ve been ignoring me a lot, okay? Ignoring or avoiding or whatever else, we haven’t even spoken since Friday. And before you say anything, I gave it a lot of thought,” he said quickly, even as Remy opened his mouth to give an reason. Anything to get out of it, that he wasn’t feeling well, that he had been busy or some other half-ass excuse to explain his distance, but Logan carried on without him. “And I really think it’s because of ditching you. I really do, because I said things wouldn’t change, and I promised that it’d be the same, but not even a week later and I break it. I’m honestly sorry, Remy, and I hate saying that because it ain’t gonna change a damn thing about what happened on Friday. So… I’m asking for a fresh start. Let’s just try again, and this Friday we’ll do it exactly how we did before. What do you say…?”

Remy thought about it for a few moments. Logan only got it half right, but Remy figured an excuse from him was better than one he could make up for himself on the spot. He also knew things wouldn’t be the same; Logan could promise and swear all he wanted, but with Jean around, Friday traditions were out the window. But if Logan wanted a fresh start… well, who was Remy to say no?

He nodded and smiled at Logan. “Oui, mon ami… a fresh start would be fo’ de best.” He looked down at his hands, which were fiddling with the hem of his shirt. He figured he could add on _some_ sort of explanation, just to make Logan feel a little better. “Remy admits dat you callin’ him up upset him… he didn’ like dat…” he nearly said that he chose Jean over him – which in essence, he did – but he quickly caught himself. “Dat de two o’ us weren’ able to spend de time we always spent toget’er on Fridays. But if yo’ askin’ fo’ a new start, Remy ain’ gonna deny you o’ dat.”

Logan looked utterly relieved, which in turn made Remy feel much better. “Okay, good… thanks, Remy. That means a lot.” He laughed a little, grinning at Remy. Finally he shifted the truck’s gears and headed the direction back to his house. Remy slid down in the seat a little, comforted again by the warmth it held.

“So was dat de important t’ing you wanted to tell Remy?” He asked, looking over at Logan again. Even slouched down, their gazes were even.

“Well… yeah, I guess.” Logan shrugged.

“You wanted Remy to come all de way over to tell him dat, but you managed it in maybe two minutes an’ we ain’ even at yo’ house yet.” Remy couldn’t help smiling teasingly at him, and Logan huffed, lost for words briefly.

“I… I just…” He frowned for a moment when Remy snickered, then rolled his eyes. “I figured you’d rather hear something like that in person, not over the phone or something.”

“Non, non, Remy understands,” he said, his laughter dying a little. “T’ough he’s t’inkin’ it was also an excuse to get him to come over too, since he’s apparently avoidin’ you.” He smiled. In that moment, Remy wasn’t sure what to think: if it was obvious that Logan was done talking to him before they even left Remy’s place, so why didn’t he just get out and go back inside? He _was_ avoiding Logan – and Jean – and he’d been doing well, too. It hurt to be around him more than it used to, but he knew he couldn’t stay away forever. It hurt just as much to be without him. He still needed Logan in his life. There just wasn’t another way about it.

“Well…” Logan pointedly didn’t look at him. “You’ve always been a bit better at figuring things out…”

Remy’s smile softened and he felt his heart race a little. His chest spread with a warm feeling that he felt go all the way to his fingers and toes. In moments like this, Logan had to be the most endearing person in the entire world. Words couldn’t even begin to describe for Remy just how wonderful it made him feel, knowing Logan would go to such lengths to try and get him back in his life again. He reached out and patting his arm, still keeping things on friendly terms, and said, “Oui, Remy has. Doesn’ change de fact that he appreciates it all de same, whet’er he figures it out o’ not.”

They exchanged a smile, and Remy looked forward again, wrapped up in the warmth all around him. He swore Logan could take a detour and drive for hours and Remy simply couldn’t care. As long as it was just him and Logan. As desperately as he wanted Logan, he could even be content like this, he thought… he’d always imagined it just being the two of them together. Even when he was young, it was always going to be Logan and Remy, side by side. It had gone perfectly for so long… Remy only hoped that nothing would break it beyond repair now that there were others in that picture.

When they arrived at Logan’s, he let Remy get out, jogging in front of him to let him in the house. “So, you still got plenty o’ leftovers fo’ Remy to enjoy?”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Seriously, when do I not?” He opened the door, walking inside, Logan following after him.

“Good,” Remy said, heading straight for the fridge. He opened it and looked inside. “’Cause Remy’s got a lot o’ Remy-Time to make up from all dose weekends you’ve been workin’.”

“Well, don’t forget about Jean-Time now.”

Remy froze, busying himself quickly and reaching inside and grabbing whatever he could get his hands on first. Pulling out the small takeout box, he turned and put on a smile, closing the fridge door behind him. By that point, Jean had risen from her place on the couch and entered the kitchen area. “Ahh, Jean…”

“Hi Remy,” she said sweetly. Like a sugar coma, Remy thought. “How’re you?”

“Fine, fine…” Remy passed a look between Jean and Logan, and almost instantly, Jean moved to stand right beside Logan, her arm sliding around his waist. He forced the words to come out. “An’ you?”

“Wonderful,” she said, giving a look to Logan, and not just _any_ look. Remy’s brows drew together and Logan suddenly coughed, loosely draping an arm around Jean’s shoulders. 

“Uh, yeah, so… we were just gonna put in a movie, kill some time… Anything in particular you wanna watch?”

“Oh, non, it’s up to you… Remy don’ mind.” He took the takeout he’d grabbed and shoved it into the microwave, not really wanting to watch them cuddling in the middle of the kitchen.

“Great, I’ve got the perfect movie then.” Jean went back to the living room, putting in a DVD that she already had set out. 

“What kind of movie is it?” Logan asked, rummaging through a cupboard and grabbing a bag of popcorn. Remy’s food was nearly done already, so he pulled it out a little early, not minding it a little cold before eating it. He grabbed a fork from the drawer and started to stir the Chinese food in the small box, leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Well, it’s a bit of a chick-flick…” Jean said slowly, looking a little apologetic but smiling all the same. Remy instantly groaned and turned to Logan, giving him a look that clearly read ‘you can’t be serious’. Maybe it was a little dramatic, but when it came to Jean, he didn’t care in the least. Feeling torn, Logan hurriedly opened the bag of popcorn and threw the bag in the microwave, starting it as soon as he selected the proper settings.

“Don’t judge it so soon!” Jean protested. “It’s a good movie, it’s not _just_ a romance, I promise.”

“Logan.” Remy said, looked directly at his back, knowing he could feel his gaze. “Remy didn’ come here t’ cry his eyes out over some star-crossed lovers. If Remy’s watchin’ a movie, someone’s gotta die a brutal deat’ wit’ lots o’ blood o’ dere’s gotta be a good amoun’ o’ action. An’ explosions,” he added, pointing the fork at Logan. From in front of the microwave, there was a low sigh, and Logan turned to Remy, giving him a pleading look.

Remy only raised an eyebrow at him.

Logan turned his eyes to Jean, who didn’t seem as perky as before. She tried to give him a persuading look too, but there was something else… a little edge to it. He opened his mouth, then looked at Remy and closed it again. With a slump of his shoulders, he said, “Well… it can’t hurt to, y’know… try something new?”

Jean instantly grinned and hit the play button on the menu. Meanwhile, Remy’s jaw had instantly dropped.

“Seriously?!”

“Yes, seriously.” Logan gave him a stern look, and Remy snapped his jaw shut, frowning a little. The microwave beeped – something Logan was sincerely grateful for – and he pulled the bag out and fetched a large bowl, pouring the popcorn into it. Jean turned the lights low and sat on the sofa, getting comfortable and setting the remote aside. Remy, knowing he’d lost and know there wasn’t another word to be said on the matter, shuffled over to the sitting area, taking the single-person seat. He stabbed at his food stubbornly, watching out of the corner of his eye as Logan joined Jean and sat beside her, putting the popcorn between them.

He couldn’t help but stare a little longingly. That was where _they_ used to sit.

Sinking into the cushions a little, extending his legs out and crossing them on the coffee table, Remy watched the movie. He was only half paying attention, somehow knowing that this was turning from some simple relationship between Jean and Logan to something more like war. Remy wasn’t blind, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to give in to Jean whenever she gave him a hard look. Jean didn’t like him, and she definitely wasn’t fond of the close bond he had with Logan. Remy was – _was,_ the key word in that sentence – the center of Logan’s world, and Jean was determined to change that. And damn her, because she was succeeding.  

As the move went on (which, Remy noted, was the most cliché and unbearable chick-flick he’d even witnessed in his entire life) Remy’s mind was busy on other things. If Jean was going to push, Remy was going to push right back. If Logan didn’t realize what Jean was doing, he didn’t have to know what Remy would be doing too.

It was devious, it was wrong, but Remy knew it would be damn worth it.

\----------

After the movie ended, they ordered dinner. Greek, as per Jean’s request. As she daintily ate a nice, healthy salad, Remy managed to convince Logan to order whatever contained the most meat on the entire menu and they ate it like animals, Logan laughing as he got sauce on his own chin and nose, while Remy laughed with him, beyond amused. As undeniably shitty as the food was, they ate it all the same, Remy taking more pleasure in the put off faces Jean kept making while Logan nearly choked on his… well, whatever he was eating.

After dinner, Jean cleaned up and while Remy and Logan talked at the table. Remy once caught her eye after she finished, standing beside Logan, waiting for him to notice her. The intensity of her glare was enough to make Remy shiver once, but he pushed it aside and focused only on Logan. It didn’t last nearly as long as he wanted; he finally looked at Jean, who smiled ever so kindly and said she was going back to the couch. Remy’s grin faded when he watched Logan’s eyes follow her, and he stood, knowing his time was up.

“Remy’d best get outta yo’ hair,” he said, smiling and straightening out his coat.

“Do you want…?” He gestured to the leftovers.

Remy stared at the box for a few long seconds. He looked back at Logan, his expression simple enough to figure out. The box swiftly met the garbage can a few moments later.

“Remy’ll be seein’ you, Jean,” he said as he waved goodbye, a wide grin on his face. Wide, happy, and utterly fake.

Jean smiled back bitterly, waving once before turning back to the television. Remy would consider that a sure-fire win.

As soon as Logan had driven him home, Remy hopped out and smiled at him, sad that he would have to find something to do for the rest of the evening, but the rare memories of Jean’s annoyed expression or her bitter smile were enough to keep him happy for now. “Remy’ll be seein’ you tomorrow after school, non?”

“Well, there’s actually this banquet thing… I was gonna tell you, but…” He shrugged, and Remy understood. It was his own fault for not knowing.

“Oh…” Remy lowered his gaze, but he shrugged back and put on another smile for him. “Well, den it’ll be Friday, oui?”

“Yeah, Friday. And We’ll be over by six to get you. It’s another home game.”

Remy nodded. “Alrigh’. Well, Remy’lll be seein’ you tomorrow, den.”

Logan grinned, shifting the truck’s gears. Remy closed the door and walked back. Jean was a new part of the tradition now. Not something Remy was overly thrilled with, but it was better than being forgotten again.

As soon as he walked in, Jubilee seemed to walk by right then – almost timed a little too perfectly – and she jumped, smiling at him after her ‘surprise’ had passed. “Oh, Remy, you’re back… so, uh, how was Logan’s…?”

Remy looked at her a little peculiarly, but he wasn’t going to shut down her honest interest. “It was actually good. Better dan Remy expected.”

“Yeah?” She grinned and walked in step with him as he went back to his room, his shoes off by now. “Just you and Logan hanging out? Playin’ Xbox till your eyes bled?”

Remy laughed, but shook his head. “Non, it was Logan, Remy, an’… well, Jean was dere.”

Jubilee seemed at a loss for words. “Oh…” She looked down, stuffing her hands into his coat pockets.

“Don’ get down like dat, Jubes,” Remy chided, guiding her into his room. “It was… still nice.”

“Really?” She didn’t seem all too convinced. “Because… that sounds terrible.”

Remy sat down on the bed, Jubilee joining him. He refrained from saying anything at first, but eventually a small smirk came on his face, and he said, “Well… it wasn’t bad because… let’s jus’ say Remy caused a little bit o’ hell fo’ Jean…” He grinned, and Jubilee burst out laughing, punching his shoulder.

“You ass!” She fell back on the bed, kicking her legs a little before sitting upright. “You are _devious!_ ”

Remy scoffed, feeling a little pride for his actions now. “What, like Remy’s never been so befo’?”

“No, but… oh my god, Remy, you need to keep this up. You need to do it _more!_ ”

“What?” Remy rolled his eyes. “C’mon Jubes, what’re you even sayin’? Remy got it out, he got back at Jean fo’… well, bein’ Jean. He’s good now, he feels better.”

Jubilee stood from the bed, grinning excitedly at him. “No, this isn’t gonna stop here. We need to capitalize on this. We’ve gotta get right up in Jean’s face, right where it hurts.”

Remy sighed. “Jubilee, please…”

“No, listen to me. I dunno what you want exactly; I’m not gonna pry either. But I think if you’re already throwing punches and knowing damn well that Jean will throw some back, things are gonna get ugly. You wanna know what I’d do?” She stepped in close, his smile nearly sinister. “Time to take the jealousy route.”

He sighed again, this time more exhaustedly. “Jubes, Remy ain’ gonne stoop dat low. He’s not gonna try an’… steal Logan back.” But right when he said that, he felt a spark of something; something that told him that maybe it wasn’t the _worst_ idea…

“Oh yes you are. You’re gonna take him back. And y’know how you do that?”

Remy looked up at her, curious. “What’s dat?”

She narrowed her eyes, a plan already in the works in her mind. “Leather. Lots and lots of leather.”

\----------

It turned out that the banquet suited both Remy and Logan quite well. While Logan was out socializing with a bunch of strangers and their families and business owners and people from the local town, Remy and Jubilee had gone out. It was a strange moment when Remy actually realized just how old she was, since she’d taken him to a few places in the city that even _he_ didn’t know about.

“Tell Remy again how you found dat store?” He asked, adjusting the large bag on his arm.

She shrugged, taking him right to his room and tossing the bags she carried on the bed. “Y’know. Friends, people talk. Mostly Google.” Remy rolled his eyes and dumped out the bag and its contents on the blankets, looking at them thoughtfully.  “Now,” she started again, pulling out some specific items she’d picked out for Remy. “Kitty was supposed to do it tomorrow, but she can’t. She’s got some… thing. Y’know. Too busy.” She was grinning to herself, and Remy raised an eyebrow suspiciously. “So all you have to do is wear this, this, and finally…”

Remy looked at the jersey she pulled out from her purse. “Dat’s…”

“Yup. So as soon as you pair these together, and then give Logan this,” she handed him a few magazines, ones that made Remy blink, but not unfamiliarly, “you’ll so be set. Oh, and… don’t forget to make sure Jean sees.”

“Dey’re always in de halls toget’er. Since dis is gon’ take place in between classes, she’ll be dere. I don’t worry about dat.”

“Good. So, ready for this?”

Remy nodded slowly, then grinned. “Oui. Remy is.”

After they put away all of Remy’s clothes and set aside the ones he’d wear the next day, Remy couldn’t help feeling a small amount of anxiety build up a little. As he sat in bed, his eyes drawn to his clothes for the next day, he wondered if this was even a good idea. Logan would get the joke… he would. He’d laugh and so would his friends (and maybe even the other girls too). It would work… Remy reached over for the magazines and opened one curiously, flipping through a few pages, and suddenly smiled.

Leave Jubilee to manage to find a magazine with girls _and_ guys in it.

\----------

When Jubilee led Remy to the locker room between second and third period, she dragged him into the girl’s room after a brief protesting from his part and stared at the girls, each wearing jerseys. Some stared, confused, but one girl pushed forward and was grinning, which – even despite Remy’s love for Logan – he couldn’t try to deny was beautiful.

“Jubilee!” She said, stepping forward and hugging her. “So, this is happening for real then?”

“Oh yeah,” she replied, grinning up at Remy. “Remy, this is Anna-Marie, but she goes by Rogue. Rogue, Remy.”

“Hi, nice to meet you,” she said kindly, and Remy put on a smile, taking her hand and lifting it to his lips to kiss gently. She instantly blushed and a few of the girls behind her giggled.

“De pleasure is Remy’s, chere,” he said smoothly, gently lowering her hand and keeping his eyes on hers for a while. She soon looked away, but looked back at him a few times, her cheeks still bright red a few minutes after their introduction.

“So _anyways,_ ” Jubilee said pointedly, sending a small glare to Remy (to which he smiled innocently and shrugged), “Remy’s got everything he needs. Just give him a place to change and he’ll be set.”

“Perfect,” Rogue said, and gestured for Remy to follow as she led him to the stalls near the back of the room.

“You ladies alright wit’ Remy doin’ dis? Aren’ any o’ you friends wit’ Jean?”

“Well, sorta,” Rogue said with a shrug. “Emma’s a little torn, and Amara is kinda straight up against it.” Rogue smiled apologetically. “Then there’s Illyana who is pretty neutral, Kayla who is totally for it, and a few others. And of course, ah don’t mind you givin’ Jean a taste of her own medicine one bit.  Mostly equal ground here.”

Remy laughed, figuring it was more than he could ask for. “Could be worse.”

“Yeah, could be a _lot_ worse. Now, uh, ah’ll leave you to, uh… change. And stuff.” She immediately turned and ducked her head behind her hair, making Remy laugh and walk into the small stall to change. She was definitely pretty, that much Remy knew. He couldn’t help but wondering if she found him attractive… she seemed to be blushing enough for every girl in the room after all.

Focusing on the task at hand, Remy stripped down and pulled out his trousers and his jersey, pulling the pants on with a decent amount of effort then slipping the jersey on as well. Seeing that Kitty was a bit smaller than he was, it clung rather tightly to his frame, but Jubilee said that was “all for the better”. He pulled on the boots as a final touch and ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. Well, no going back now.

He stepped out of the stall and was instantly met with a loud whistle, then a few catcalls to go along with it. He laughed, somewhat embarrassed, but it boosted his own confidence too, and he walked out to the girls who were all grinning at him. Even Amara, who was laughing behind her hand.

Rogue nodded approvingly. “Damn, sugah…” She circled him and grinned. “Yo’ gonna make Jean wish she hadn’t even bothered wakin’ up this mornin’.”

Jubilee stepped up to him, murmuring under her breath as the rally girls talked in agreement. “And you’re gonna knock Logan right off his feet.”

“Remy hopes yo’ right, petite.”

Jubilee shook her head. “You don’t need any hope, Remy. It’s a home run, right about now.”

When the bell for passing period began, Rogue went front and center in front of all of them. “Ladies, and gentleman, it’s time to get this goin’. So grab whatever you need and meet back here before class gets started, alright?” She turned and walked out, and the rest of them followed, Jubilee staying beside Remy as he walked out.

“Just gotta go up a flight of stairs and then find Logan and Jean, give him the magazines, and call it good.” She handed him the rolled up magazines from her backpack, but Remy barely heard a word. As they went through the halls and soon began splitting up to find their designated football players, cheers were shouted and for the first time in Remy’s life, he didn’t mind Friday’s obnoxious spirit day one bit. Halfway up the stairs someone had grabbed his ass, but Remy laughed, simply because he couldn’t think of anything else to do. He knew he owed Jubilee big time, but how he’d repay her, he’d figure out later. For now, Logan was in sights finally, and walk became more purposeful than ever.

Logan heard the sudden cheers and shouts and he knew what was happening. Jean wasn’t at all excited about the rally girls coming around, but they’d talked about it, and Logan had reassured her than everything would be alright. Nothing would happen with them, just like nothing had happened the three years before, so she took his word on it.

Thankfully for Jean, she didn’t have to worry about a rally _girl._

When Logan turned around and was expecting one of the girls – he’d heard rumors about both Emma and Kitty, though no one was sure who had which Rally girl – his grin became a look of instant shock and surprise. Remy, clad in a tight football jersey and even tighter leather pants, strode up to him, smirking like the smug bastard he always was. He was carrying something in his hand too, but whatever it was became instantly forgotten as Remy stepped up to him – and not just in front of him or beside him, but _right_ in whatever remained of his personal space – and looked down at him through his lashes, his eyes somehow darker than usual.

“’Ey, Logan,” he said idly, drawling his words a little and drawing a sizeable crowd. Logan was frozen in place. Beside them, Jean’s jaw had dropped.

“R-Remy…?!” He looked down at him, his eyes wandering far too long for Jean’s liking. “Wh-what the… what the hell are you doing!?”

“Had a lil’ change-up wit’ de girls,” he said, reaching out to grab the hem of Logan’s own jersey, tugging gently. “Kitty couldn’ make it in today, so dey called in de next best t’ing.” Remy raised an eyebrow at him, his smirk now stretched into a wide grin. “Quite an improvement, non?”

“Uh…” Logan knew his face was red; more red than it had ever been in his entire life. He couldn’t believe Remy was here, dressed like this, his shirt lightly outlining the slightly toned muscles hidden beneath, and his pants… well, his pants were working more miracles in the span of ten minutes than any other pair of pants could ever hope to achieve in an entire lifetime.

“Well, Remy took it upon himself to get you a lil’ somet’in’ for all yo’ efforts on de football team.” He unrolled the magazines and showed the first one cover-out to Logan, who instantly was pushed back further against the lockers, if it were possible. He wondered if he could hide in one right then. He spared half a glance over to Jean, who had gasped, her own cheeks bright red.

Logan took the magazines with nearly trembling hands. “R-Remy, this… you…”

“Dere ain’ a single need to t’ank Remy, cher.” Almost daring the limits entirely, he reached up and grabbed Logan’s chin, forcing their eyes to meet. “Just t’ink o’ him if yo’ ever bored, eh?” He sent a wink Logan’s way, unconsciously darting his tongue out over his lips. He let go of Logan’s chin and stepped back, Rogue having joined the show and Amara admittedly biting bad a wide smile. Jubilee stood with her arms folded over his chest, feeling more than accomplished.

“O-… okay….” Logan swallowed and looked between the magazine and Remy, his eyes flickering from his eyes to different parts of his outfit – mostly, though, to those leather pants.

“You have a good one, Logan. And play hard tonight.” Logan nearly choked, and Jean finally looked at Remy, her eyes narrowed and her glare incredibly fierce. Remy simply looked back at her and grinned, knowing damn well she knew that her plan had far beyond succeeded. She instantly turned and walked away with a huff, but Logan didn’t even notice. Rogue had come up beside him, by then and took his arm, smiling up at him. Remy nodded to her and sent yet another wink to Logan, turning and walking with Rogue on one arm and Jubilee on the other, swaying his hips far more than necessary, but Logan’s eyes refused to leave the nearly hypnotic sight. Beside him, other players had clapped hands on his shoulders, telling him he’d gotten the best show yet.

Logan didn’t even reply, but somehow he knew that he had enjoyed it nearly just as much as Remy had. 


	6. Chapter 6

“Dat wasn’ a half bad game dere, Logan,” Remy said, pushing through his door, Logan behind him and Jean in tow.

“Thanks, I _have_ been playing football for what, six years or so?”

“And in all dat time, you haven’ grown a damn inch.” He laughed and Logan punched his shoulder, reaching in the fridge and grabbing two Cokes. As soon as he heard Jean clear her throat, he flushed bright red and opened it again to grab another soda for her. Remy smirked to himself and circled the couch, sitting down on the longer one and stretching his legs out across the length of it. He crossed his ankles, cracking open the soda and downing a good portion of it in one swig. Logan went to take a quick shower, and not once in all that time did Jean speak to Remy, or vice versa.

When he returned maybe ten minutes later, hair towel-dried and clothes haphazardly thrown on, he made a beeline for where he left his soda and took a drink. Remy looked, relieved that Logan was back, spoke up. “So,” he said slowly, looking over the back cushion at Logan – and only Logan. “What’s de plan fo’ tonight, eh?”

“If you guys wanna pick a movie, I’ll be fine with that,” Jean piped up, not exactly wanting to be forgotten.

“You got a preference?” Logan asked, and Jean shook her head.

“No, I chose the last one,” she said with a shug.

From the other side of the couch, there was a loud cough, and Remy nodded. “Ain’ dat de trut’…”

Jean smiled fakely, looking directly at Remy. “And, I figured I’d let you guys decide on the next one.”

“How considerate, Jeanie,” Remy said, raising his Coke can as if in a toast. “So Logan, what’s it gonna be, eh? Remy’s t’inking zombies o’ ghosts. Maybe mo’ parano’mal, actually.”

Logan seemed to consider it. “Yeah, that sounds good. I’ll go for that.” He went to his shelf beside the TV and picked out a few movies, ones he had directly from memory, and set some down until he had a top three. Jean watched as Logan went over to the couch, and without even looking, knocked Remy’s legs aside and sat right beside him. Remy of course didn’t mind in the least, and even grinned when Logan muttered something about moving his lazy ass aside. Logan leaned over the movies he had selected in deep thought and held them in front of Remy, who looked over each one idly, one by one.

“Dis is a good one, oui,” Remy said, holding up one and examining the cover. “Amityville’s a classic.”

“Yeah, but what about an exorcism one? Figure you’d be more for that.”

“Mm, could be. Well, let’s put it dis way, Remy picked de genre, so you get to choose de movie.”

Behind them, Jean frowned.

“Alright…” Logan looked between the selections, then tapped one of the DVDs. “Right. Classic it is.”

“Perfect.” Remy this time crossed his ankles on the coffee table in front of them. As soon as Logan put the DVD in, he sat down beside him and looked back at Jean.

“Could you hit the lights?”

“Sure…” She did as she was asked, then sat beside Logan. She smiled a little when he put his arm around her, and she settled into his side. This would be good, she convinced herself. Just a movie night, her and Logan… sure, Remy was there, but that wouldn’t be a problem, right?

When the movie was over and Jean needed to go home later, it ended up being a major one.

Halfway through, Remy felt himself drifting off. He really hated falling asleep during movies since he always wanted to see the end – no matter how many times he’d seen it already. However, he went from sitting upright, to his leg against Logan’s, to his head resting on his shoulder. His eyes began drooping, and somewhere in the midst of all of this, an arm came around his shoulders. He smiled to himself and shifted a little, his legs twisting a little uncomfortably in that position. Of course, when he kept fidgeting and moving, Logan muttered into his hair to ‘sit somewhere and stay put’, so he did what he did best: he pulled back, threw his legs over Logan’s and rested, just like that. Of course, Remy murmured that he asked for it, and Logan grumbled that as long as he stopped moving around so damn much, he’d be fine.

Jean leaned over to glare at Remy, but Remy didn’t pay her any mind. She wasn’t worth his time, he decided. As if the rally girl joke wasn’t enough, he let himself stay put and take advantage of his closeness with Logan, his cheek sitting comfortably on Logan’s shoulder while his hand gripped the very end of his shirt and held on loosely. It both made him feel so much closer to Logan, but also relieved about the entire situation with Jean. He could still do this. Maybe not to her liking, but Logan didn’t give a single fuck. He didn’t need Jean’s approval, did he? Logan didn’t even notice any of this happening, but Jean’s eyes didn’t leave Remy’s hand for a good minute, both alarmed and astounded that Logan didn’t realize that any of this was happening.

When the movie had just about ended, Remy had fallen asleep once or twice, but was quickly awake enough that Jean would have to leave soon. And if he could, he’d do what he had to to make sure Logan stayed. He watched the movie come to a conclusion through his almost-closed eyes, resisting the urge to follow along with the words. As the credits came on, he finally closed his eyes, wondering if he could actually fall asleep within a minute or two.

There was a brief silence, and Logan made some sort of gesture, and Jean stood. The sound from the TV turned off, and Remy waited, realizing it was seriously juvenile to pretend to sleep like this, but he truly didn’t want Logan going anywhere. Not now. When the light to the living room turned on, Remy closed his eyes tighter, nuzzling his face into Logan’s chest, hearing a soft sigh. One that didn’t sound to happy. It also sounded downright bitchy, but that last part was probably subjective.

“I have to go home,” Jean’s voice said, and he felt Logan make a small movement under him.

“I… I’m a bit trapped,” he said with a light laugh, but Jean didn’t find the humor.

“It’s really late, and my parents won’t want to drive me. I’m almost out past my curfew too. It’s _late_ , Logan…”

He stammered above Remy, one hand resting on his legs, but Remy swore it was hesitant. Around his back, Logan’s arm tightened a little. “Just… give me a minute, I’ll be there in a sec…” There was another sigh and footsteps. Alone, finally, and it was much better this way. Logan’s hand on his legs shook them slightly, but Remy refused to open his eyes, his hand pulling a little on his shirt. “Remy, hey… c’mon, get up, I need to move…”

Remy dared to murmur something, nothing more than a small sound, and Logan laughed a little.

“You know damn well Jean’s gonna get mad here in a few… I’ll be back soon, okay? Just… let go, just for a little bit. I’ll be back, I promise.” Remy wanted to hold on, just a little longer, but something pressed against his forehead. Something that sure as hell felt like a pair of lips. “For me, please,” Logan murmured, and Remy finally gave in, his hold on his shirt releasing and his limbs becoming a little more pliant. Logan slid from under his legs, but he didn’t just up and leave. He grabbed a blanket and set Remy’s legs on the couch and draped a blanket over him. Remy snuggled into the blanket and Logan smiled down at him. He watched him for a moment, a warm feeling spreading through his chest, but he quickly remembered that he had to take Jean home and he shook his head to clear his thoughts, grabbing his keys in the kitchen and going out the front.

When the front door closed, Remy stayed right where he was. He had a smile on his face and he felt wonderful about the day. He’d probably pissed of Jean more times than he could count on both hands, but more importantly, Logan cared about him, so much… he knew it, but sometimes in moments like that where Logan treated him like the most important thing, it renewed Remy’s faith in everything.

Meanwhile, Logan had dropped Jean off, kissed her goodnight, but he didn’t feel as good about it as he usually did. His mind had been on Remy, the way he’d acted around him… more specifically, the way they acted around one another. It seemed normal to him, but with Jean watching him, he wondered just how close they were. That didn’t matter though, not really. He and Remy were close friends for a reason, and they acted a certain way around each other. They didn’t know any better, and no one had ever thought twice about it. There was no reason for it to have to change.

When he pulled back up to his place, he stayed in the car for a moment, knowing he’d do what he normally did when he found Remy on the couch: wake him up, drag him to his bedroom, let him sleep on the right side because it was closer to the window, and Remy loved watching the sun rise if he got up early enough. That, or he could wake up and crawl about five feet to play Xbox until Logan woke up.

He wondered if other people did that for their best friends… he honestly couldn’t imagine his friendship with Remy any other way. 

Logan finally got out of his truck and walked inside, locking the door behind him and setting his keys on the table. He laughed to himself when he found Remy right where he left him. “Lazy ass,” he murmured softly, and he leaned out and shook Remy’s shoulder. He resisted at first, curling up tighter and pulling the blanket over his head, but as soon as Logan pulled it off of him, Remy flopped lazily on his back and pouted up at him. “Get up,” Logan muttered, and Remy threw his arms up and held them out to Logan, who rolled his eyes and took them in his own hands. Once he got Remy up, he practically carried him to his room, one hand holding tightly to his waist while the other held an arm over his own shoulders.

Once they got to his room, Logan guided Remy to the edge of his bed and sat him down, letting him get out of his jeans and jacket. Logan turned on a lamp while Remy tossed his clothing carelessly to the floor, turning and literally crawling up Logan’s bed to his usual place. Logan caught himself watching for a moment and shook his head, walking out to the hallway and turning off the main, kitchen, and living room lights as a distraction. After a quick brushing of his teeth, he turned off that light and came to the dim light of the bedroom, catching Remy’s half-lidded gaze from the bed. He didn’t move for a moment, mesmerized by it, unsure what he was doing.

“Wha’…?” Remy asked, shifting a little on the bed from his original sprawled out position to one that was just a little less sprawled out. Logan shook his head, his eyes never leaving Remy’s.

“I’ve always loved your eyes,” Logan said suddenly, not even thinking. Remy blinked, now a little more awake than before.  

“Oh…” He averted his gaze, returning it again when Logan moved towards the bed, and Remy’s mind began racing, his heart speeding up as he turned off the lamp and knelt onto the bed. He could have sworn their eyes never broke contact until Logan laid down beside him, back turned to him. He swallowed thickly, wondering what it all meant, but he knew it would be a useless effort. It didn’t have to mean anything… Logan was just complimenting him. Almost as if just realizing it, he quickly said, “T’anks.”

“Yeah…” Logan forced himself to close his eyes. The sooner he slept, the better.

Beside him, Remy didn’t fall asleep as quickly as Logan did. He looked at the ceiling for a while, then to the window, and finally looked over to Logan’s back. He listened to his even breathing, wishing just for the night he could reach out and pull him close. It was all he wanted. He wished that one day, maybe, he could have that. Then he’d be happy. He was sure of it.

\----------

It was clear to both Logan and Remy that Jean wasn’t going to be talking to either of them for a while.

For Remy, that suited him just fine. For Logan… not so much.

“It’s not your fault,” Logan said for the hundredth time. “She just… she was shocked, that’s all. After you did that whole rally thing, she just… she just needs time to sorta… get her head around that. I just need to find her and talk to her, tell her it… I dunno, what should I even say?!”

Remy sighed. “Logan, you need to understand dat sometimes women jus’ need to be alone.” He shrugged casually, not even knowing whether Jean was that type of girl or not. “Give her space.”

“But what if she doesn’t want space? What if she wants me to talk to her?”

“If she wants to talk to you, she shouldn’t be dodgin’ you.” He looked at Logan pointedly, who sighed.

“I guess you’re right…”

“Damn right Remy’s right. Look, Logan, jus’ give her time. She’ll come back. And if not, you’ve always got dose magazines.” He grinned, and Logan rolled his eyes.

“Y’know, I’m starting to think you’re not in a relationship because you say shit like that, not because you don’t want to be “tied down”,” he said, mocking him by gesturing with actual air-quotes.

Remy scoffed, putting an arm loosely around Logan’s shoulders. “See, dat’s where you an’ Remy differ, mon ami. He don’ worry about de small t’ings. Fo’ example, Remy don’ sit and worry about why Jean won’ talk to him, o’ what he should be doin’ to make up fo’ what happened. It was a joke, it was funny, an’ people enjoyed it. A woman wit’out a sense of humor is a bad t’ing. T’ough, look who Remy’s talkin’ to, eh?” He grinned and Logan shoved him away, glaring at him.

“Watch your mouth.” Remy fell into step beside him in the hallway, glad that things for once seemed to be _normal_. No Jean hanging on Logan’s shoulder, no awkwardness between them. Even after Friday and the entire weekend, Monday felt like it used to before Logan got together with Jean. After a short silence between them as they made their way to class, Remy was met with a few more watchful eyes than before. He hadn’t quite realized what the entire show from Friday would bring, but apparently people saw him as more than the foster kid with dirty old clothes who was a class prankster. Logan didn’t really realize what was going on, but as soon as someone whistled lowly as Remy passed, he looked over his shoulder at them. Remy on the other hand laughed to himself, his cheeks warming up a little.

“Gon’ have to get used to dat fo’ de next few days,” Remy said, looking where Logan was, and turning back when a girl winked at him.

“I still can’t believe you did that,” he said under his breath. “A rally girl? Really?”

He frowned, giving him an innocent look. “What? Remy can’ change up his style every so often?”

“But aren’t you a cheerleader or somethin’? Isn’t that against some law that you can’t associate with those girls?”

“Remy swings bot’ ways, Logan,” he said with a shit-eating grin, which earned himself a punch in the arm as they walked into class.

The rest of the day went without much interaction with Jean; she avoided Logan all the way until lunch where he pulled her aside and talked to her. While he did, Remy sat alone at the table, keeping to himself, but he always felt eyes on him. It almost bothered him how much he didn’t mind it. For once, people weren’t looking down on him… it made Remy actually feel like he wasn’t some constant nuisance, or just another person in the way of everyone else. He smiled to himself, looking around a few times, catching some eyes. People were _very_ interested in him, and he wasn’t even sure half to time how to react. He sent back a smile a few times and even dared to wink back at one girl who immediately turned red and ducked down low. He laughed to himself, right until Logan sat back down across from him a few moments later.

“So, we’re gonna talk tonight.”

Remy looked up. “We?”

“Jean and I.”

“Oh.” He looked down at his food again. “’Bout what?”

“Not really sure…” Logan shrugged and picked up his food again, taking a small bite. “She still seems real upset over… well, lots of things. I just don’t have a single clue about what.”

“Women,” Remy said, as if that was an excuse enough. Logan smirked lightly, but it faded.

“I just wanna know what’s eating at her, y’know? It bugs me that she feels like she can’t tell me here because it’s ‘not the right place’. I’m gonna be thinking about all of this until after football. That’s at least another six hours. I wasn’t able to _stop_ thinking about it this entire weekend. She didn’t call once.”

“How often do you two talk to each ot’er anyways? You call, text, talk at school and afterwards and during football and probably pass notes too. Do you talk while you two are makin’ out or’ somet’in’ too?” The thought made Remy shudder a little bit, but he ignored it for now.

Logan grimaced. “C’mon, don’t be like that. We just talk. It’s normal.”

“De amounts you two talk is borderin’ on mutual stalkin’.”

Logan gave him a deadpan look. “… Mutual stalking?”

“Oui. It won’ be long ‘til de two o’ you are waitin’ outside each ot’er’s windows to see if yo’ home an’ wanna spend de night toget’er.” After a moment he smirked, and Logan rolled his eyes, sighing exhaustedly. 

“Really? Is that _all_ you ever think about?”

Remy shrugged. “S’pose you could say I t’ink about it enough fo’ de bot’ o’ us, since yo’ clearly not gettin’ any.”

Logan was silent for at least a solid minute before he stood, grabbing his tray. “Shut your damn mouth.” He went to dump his food, Remy of course right behind him, relieved in a way that he was right.

\----------

After Logan had given Remy a ride home after practice, He cleaned up and showered and paced his living room, wondering how in the hell they were going to start this conversation. He’d never really had a serious talk like this before. The nerves were eating him up and they showed in practice; he had been completely out of sync with the entire rest of the team and was eventually benched in the last half hour of practice. That of course only added on to the stress he already had, but he figured he could deal with football later. Right now, his entire focus was on Jean.

As if on cue, there was a knock at the door, and Logan took yet another deep breath and walked over to it, opening it and smiling forcibly at Jean, who returned it similarly. “Come in,” he said, stepping aside and closing the door behind her. “Uh, we can go to the couch, if you want…”

“Okay,” she said softly, walking over and sitting down on one side. Logan sat down on the other end, not sure if he should sit too close. When she adjusted a little bit in her seat, her eyes down. Logan figured he may as well start it off, since it didn’t look like she’d be talking anytime soon (despite her being the one who asked to come over).

“Look, if this is about Friday—”

She shook her head. “Don’t start like that…”

Logan frowned. “What?”

“When you say ‘look’, it’s like you’re talking down to me.”

He sat there for a moment, trying to figure out what the hell that even meant. Despite wanting to argue it and say that no, that was just how he talked, he cleared his throat and started over. “Okay,” he said pointedly, “if this entire thing is about Friday… It wasn’t that bad, it was just a joke—”

“But it _wasn’t,_ don’t you get it?”

Logan sighed. “Maybe it was just some girls on the rally squad… thing, just trying to be smart. I dunno. It was funny! People laughed!”

“Was _I_ laughing?” She snapped, looking at him finally.

Logan thought for a minute. He didn’t actually know. He had been so caught up in Remy, how he looked, his clothes, how they fit him… he shook his head. “I didn’t… I guess I wasn’t really looking…”

“Well I wasn’t. It wasn’t funny, and I wasn’t laughing.”

“Okay, okay…” He looked down at his shirt, fingers fumbling with the hem of it. He really didn’t know what else to do at the moment. “I guess… I just don’t see what the big deal is.”

Jean laughed bitterly, shaking her head. “The ‘deal’ is… I…” She sighed softly. “This isn’t easy to say…”

“Well… c’mon, you can tell me.” Finally feeling it was a good time, he moved a little closer to her on the couch. She didn’t move away from him, so he considered it a good step in the right direction. “Whatever it is, I want to know.”

She took a deep breath, nodding to herself. “Okay… okay, but… you can’t laugh, and you can’t… don’t judge me for this, alright?”

“I promise,” he said, leaning in a little closer.

Before she spoke again, she clearly began doubting herself. She was biting her lower lip and pushing her hair behind her ear over and over again, and Logan nearly lost his patience and asked her to just spit it out. Of course, knowing that would really send things in the wrong direction, he forced himself to wait. “I think I have… competition.” She closed his eyes, appearing almost helpless.

Logan frowned. “Competition…? But… who?”

Jean was silent for a long time before murmuring, “… Remy.”

He couldn’t stop himself; he laughed. He didn’t laugh hard, but he was definitely caught by surprise. Remy? Of all people in that school, in the _world_ , it would be Remy?! “J-Jean… Remy?!”

“Yes!” She said defensively. “He… he did that, on Friday, just to spite me!”

“Jean, it was a _joke…_ ”

“No, Logan, it wasn’t. That was deliberate, all of it was! Not just the rally girl thing, but the movie! Laying on you like that, pretending to sleep, all of it!”

He looked at her incredulously. “Pretending to sleep? Come on, Jean, you can’t be serious.”

“Well I am! I’m very serious Logan, and it upsets me that you’ll side with Remy before you side with me! It always happens!”

“That’s not true. Remember when you picked that movie we watched a week ago? That was you! I sided with you over Remy! So no, it doesn’t _always_ happen.” He stopped, taking a deep breath to calm her down. He knew he’d unraveled Jean’s argument when she didn’t speak out against him again, now sitting with her arms folded and a strong pout on her lips. Logan bit the inside of his cheek and spoke again. “Jean, even if it was, Remy isn’t… he’s not like that! He doesn’t want… he…” He shook his head, not even sure how to put it into words. “He’s not after… me. He isn’t trying to do any of that. It was a joke, and it was funny. That’s all, that has nothing to do with us.”

“But what about the movie, huh?”

“It’s hard to explain…”

“Is it? Too hard to explain to your _girlfriend?_ ”

Logan threw his hands up in surrender. “Well, for you, I’ll do my damn best. Remy is… he’s my best friend, okay? He’s sometimes been all I’ve got. We’ve been friends for a long damn time, and that ain’t gonna change one bit. He’s been there for me when I had no one else, and I mean that. After my parents died… he was the one who made me realize that everything wasn’t over. He helped me back on my feet, and I’m not gonna ever forget that. So maybe we’re close, so maybe we don’t have like you and your best friend do, but Remy is my best friend and I’m Remy’s. So if you don’t like that, I’m not sorry for it. I’m not gonna apologize for hanging out with my best friend like we have for the last five years.”

Jean didn’t say anything for a few seconds. She seemed to realize her wrongs ( _Finally,_ Logan couldn’t help thinking), and Logan shook his head a little. “Look,” he started, and when Jean looked up at him, Logen very nearly rolled his eyes. “Yes, _look_ , Remy is special to me. He doesn’t have anyone else aside from me. No one thinks anything else of him other than that one foster kid who can’t afford a new pair of shoes unless he steals them. Yeah, he’s got his faults, but that doesn’t make him any less of a human being. He’s been there for me more than anyone else, and I’m always gonna be there for him. He’s… he’s lonely, is all. He doesn’t just reach out and instantly gain friends.”

She nodded, understanding. Unbeknownst to Logan, she her mind wasn’t fully on his argument anymore. “I get it. I really do, honestly. You’re right. I shouldn’t have made such a fuss over it… I’m sorry, Logan.”

Logan nodded, smiling a little. “Thanks.” Jean leaned in close and he met her the rest of the way, kissing her softly and resting his hand over hers. When they pulled apart, Jean shuffled closer to him on the couch and leaned against his side. She snuggled into his shoulder and Logan wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer. It felt wonderful, and Jean closed her eyes.

When a few minutes of silence had passed, Jean spoke up again. “So… I was thinking just now… you said Remy feels lonely, right…?”

Logan frowned, but didn’t say where exactly he thought she was going with that. “Yeah? What about it?”

“Well, what if we set up a double date? Y’know, you and me, and Remy comes with one of my friends. It’ll be fun, and Remy can meet someone new.”

“I dunno…” Logan wasn’t sure if Remy would even be alright with that. Even if he claimed he had plenty of experience around women, that’d be a decent amount of pressure. “Setting him up? He probably wouldn’t like that.”

“But he’s _always_ going on about how he knows what women like so well. He hits it off with almost everyone! She’ll be a nice girl, I’ll make sure of it.” Jean smiled sweetly, trying her hardest to persuade Logan. Still, he wasn’t fully convinced.

“But I don’t think he’s even remotely interested in dating right now anyways.”

“Oh c’mon, that’s like saying Remy doesn’t like flirting with all the girls at school.”

In that moment, a flash of his memory from last Friday came to his mind. Maybe not _always_ the girls… “Well still… that’s a lot of pressure for him, I think.”

“It’ll be fine, we’ll be there! It’s not like he’ll be completely alone with her. He can relax more that way.” Jean looked up at him, smiling encouragingly. “This’ll be a good thing for him, meeting new people… don’t you think?”

He thought about it for a second. He couldn’t deny that Remy did rely a bit much on Logan always being there. “Well, I guess so…”

“Just think about it at least. For me. It’ll be a fun date if we do this.”

Even though he was still slightly tentative, he couldn’t deny her reasoning. Maybe Remy needed to meet someone new, someone who could take up his time and keep him occupied. Someone who could make him as happy as Logan was with Jean. “Okay… okay, y’know, I really can’t imagine anything bad coming from this. If you think you know someone who Remy will like, then… let’s do it.”

Jean grinned. “Great. I’ve got the perfect person in mind.”

\----------

When Logan first called Remy and asked if he’d go on a date with him on Saturday, Remy nearly had a heart attack.

“You… wh-what…?”

“A date. On Saturday. Are you free?”

Remy blinked, not even breathing. “A… date.”

“If you’re gonna make me spell it out for you, I’m gonna come over there personally punch you in the gut.”

“Always a way wit’ words…” he said under his breath. “Now, what… what’s de occasion?”

“Well, we’ll be having having dinner, nothing special. But it’ll be at that one restaurant in town, y’know that Italian one? Anyways—”

“Ah, jus’… jus’ a sec, Logan…” He looked around frantically for something, anything, to distract him. He spotted Jubilee in the hallway and immediately jumped at the sight of her. “Jus’ a moment, Jubilee needs Remy.” He nearly dropped the phone on the counter and ran towards her, grabbing her sleeve and practically dragging her into his room. On the other end of the line, Logan stared confusedly, not sure what was going on that was so urgent.

“Jubes, Jubes…!!” Remy closed the door behind them and nearly shook her as hard as he could, his grip on her shoulders incredibly tight.

“What?! Are you dying? Jesus, Remy, it’s like you won the lottery or something!”

“Even better. _Infinitely_ better, Jubes!” He took a deep breath, his hands shaking. “So, Logan calls, and he asked… he asked Remy on a _date._ ”

She blinked, her jaw dropping comically. “A _date!?_ ”

“Oui, yes, a date!! Jubilee!!” She groaned and shook her again, hardly able to form words anymore.

“Oh my god, Remy…!!” She finally reached back and took his arms in her own hands, holding tightly. She was beyond ecstatic for him. “Well, what did you say?!”

“Remy tol’ Logan to hold!”

Her expression instantly dropped. “God, for someone who’s such a self-proclaimed dating expert, you can definitely be a _dumbass!_ ” She didn’t even let Remy say anything, cutting him off before a single word could come out. “Get on that phone and tell him you’re gonna go on a date with him, now!!” She pulled his hands from her arms and pushed him out of his room, shoving him towards the kitchen again and turning around with a huff. Despite it, Remy couldn’t fathom being upset with her.

He grabbed for the phone from the counter and let out a breath, the grin never once fading from his face. “Remy’s sorry ‘bout dat, it was… so’ta an emergency.” On the other end of the phone, Logan laughed, and it made Remy’s heart flutter more than before.

“No, that’s fine.”

“So…” Remy started again, now swaying back and forth a little on his feet. “A date, eh?”

“Yeah. I mean, it’s nothing too special, but it’ll be fun.”

“Oui, it will be.” Around the door, Jubilee had poked her head into the room and held up a thumbs up at Remy, mouthing ‘yes?’. Remy waved his hand frantically at her, shooing her away. He couldn’t be distracted right now. He was half-tempted to ask about Jean, why she hadn’t been mentioned, but why ruin such a moment like this? “So you said Saturday, oui? What time?”

“I’ll pick you up just before seven. We’ll leave from my place.”

“Sounds… sounds wonderful,” he said almost breathlessly. “What kinda date is dis anyways, eh? You gon’ make Remy go out an’ buy a whole new wardrobe fo’ one fancy dinner?”

“Hey, you made me get one, didn’t you?”

“Oui, he did. But you were in desperate need, cher,” his cheeks burned as he used the word, but it slipped out before he could stop it. Logan didn’t ask though, something he was partially grateful for.

“Right, so… Saturday, before seven. Dress nice. No cards.”

Remy chuckled, rolling his eyes. “Sure, sure, whatever you say den.”

After that, the week couldn’t pass by fast enough. Each day dragged on longer and longer than the last. He still saw Logan and Jean in the halls, hands held and arms around one another, even sharing a kiss once or twice. It confused Remy at first, but he couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Logan didn’t want Jean knowing about it at first. It seemed strange, even cliché, but Remy couldn’t deny the thrill he felt. Going on a private date, just them at a nice restaurant… Remy loved it. He didn’t even care in the slightest if he was getting his hopes up too high. He spent almost every class imagining how the date could end, what could happen… Logan’s bed was a very common conclusion to his daydreams.

Even at the game that Friday night, Remy’s mind was on the next day. Jubilee was taking him out again to get him something sharp to wear (because apparently he could shop for others, but not himself). She would help calm his nerves a bit… even though this was Logan, the guy he’d known longer than anyone else in his life, the date could mean _everything._ He couldn’t afford messing this up. It could be his only chance.

Jubilee didn’t wake Remy until about one in the afternoon – “You never know how late you’re gonna be up tonight, Remy…!” – and immediately dragged him to the mall. She got him a nice button-up shirt and some black jeans that, according to Jubilee, made his legs look like they were sculpted by Michelangelo himself. She had a bit too much fun dressing him, and by the time it was nearly four, they finally went home. Remy washed up and actually looked like he cared about his appearance. His hair wasn’t as messy and unkempt as usual and his clothes suited him very well. Jubilee walked in after knocking and nodded in approval, circling him.

“Wow,” she said after a moment. “You really pull off the pink shirt. And I mean, most guys look okay in pink, but jeez… it’s like it was kind of made for you.”

“What can Remy say, Jubes? Remy can wear most anyt’in’ an’ still look dis good.”

“It’s definitely an envious quality, Remy.” She rolled her eyes and stopped in front of him. “So… ready?”

He nodded, taking a deep breath. “Remy was nervous earlier, but… he t’inks he’ll be okay. It’s jus’ Logan after all, y’know? And we’ve done some strange t’ings in de past toget’er—”

Jubilee extended a hand in front of her, shaking her head quickly. “Spare me. Now c’mon, he’ll be here any minute. You do whatever final touches you need to take care of, and I’ll wait by the door.” She went to the door and opened it, squeaking in surprise when Ororo was right on the other side. “Sorry,” she said quickly, ducking her head and slipping out. Ororo smiled at her and then at Remy.

“May I come in…?”

“O’ course,” Remy said, and Ororo entered, closing the door softly behind her.

“I see you’re going out.” She smiled at him, and Remy nodded, smiling back.

“Oui. Remy’s, ah… he’s got a date.” He felt his cheeks burn a little bit.

Ororo approached Remy and rested her hand on his cheek. He leaned into her touch and smiled up at her. “And who is lucky enough to be spending an evening with someone as handsome as you?”

Remy averted his gaze. “Logan. He asked me to join him a few days ago… so Remy wanted to look nice. Do you…” he looked down at himself and stepped back a little, his expression now concerned. “Do you t’ink Remy looks alrigh’…?”

“Oh, dear,” she rested her hands on Remy’s shoulders. “You look stunning. Gorgeous. You will knock Logan right off of his feet. Just be yourself tonight, Remy. Don’t try to impress him. You are already his closest friend. He doesn’t need proving at how good you are, inside and out.”

“T’ank you, ‘Ro…” He suddenly stepped forward and pulled Ororo into a hug, burying his face in her shoulder. She was shocked at first, but she took him in a warm embrace, stroking his hair gently.

“There is no need.” She rested her chin on the top of his head. “You deserve this night. I hope it goes well for you.”

Remy nodded, finally pulling back. “Remy hopes de same.”

There were voices outside in the main room and Remy felt his heart leap up into his throat. He swallowed it down as best as he could. Ororo turned and opened the door for him, letting him lead the way out. His hands felt a little clammy, but he assured himself that everything would be fine. Not thinking, he wiped his hands on his jeans and stepped out into the main room, and nearly stopped breathing altogether.

Simplistic was indeed his style, but Remy was all the more in love with it. Logan wore loose and comfortable jeans, but they bore no tears or stains on them. They were a dark wash and framed his legs wonderfully. Finally bringing his gaze higher, Remy’s eyes found a familiar dark grey shirt he’d selected for him when they were picking shirts for his date with Jean. He couldn’t help but feel a little bit of pride at it. Logan seemed to be looking him over too, and he grinned at him, giving him a nod of acknowledgment. “You clean up real good, Rem.”

“So do you, Logan.” He laughed a little, unsure of what else to do. He stepped a little closer to him, shrugging a little. “Should we get goin’…?”

“Wait, wait!” Behind them, Jubilee had pulled out her phone. “C’mon, you guys are always so gross-looking, it’s a miracle you’re both clean and dressed nice in one night! Stand close, I want a picture.”

“Jubes, you give de best compliments,” Remy said dryly.

“Oh shut up and stand side-by-side.” She held up her phone and waited until Remy and Logan had arms around one another, taking a series of pictures including when they were smiling, when they were glaring, and a few more when they were walking out the door. She grinned as she looked through them, and Ororo came up beside her, looking over her shoulder.

“They look happy,” she said softly, and Jubilee nodded.

“Yeah, they do. Finally.” She grinned up at Ororo, who smiled down at her sweetly before heading to the kitchen to start dinner.

As soon as Remy and Logan were outside, Logan led the way to the truck, opening the door for Remy, letting him in. He didn’t close the door at first and looked Remy over, smiling. “I knew Jubilee would go nuts or somethin’ if I said this in front of her, but… you look really good, Remy. I mean… y’know, amazing.”

Remy knew his face was red; there wasn’t any denying it. He ducked his head for a moment and pushed some hair behind his ear, grinning uncontrollably. “So do you, Logan. You look stunnin’.”

Logan obviously spotted his red cheeks, and he couldn’t help feeling a knot in his stomach. Something about Remy getting so shy like that, almost hiding from him… it was endearing. When he realized he’d been stood there a moment too long, he cleared his throat a little awkwardly. “Well let’s get going, huh?” He closed the door and rounded the truck, jumping inside and starting the engine. He drove them back to his place, getting out. “Just gotta grab a few things and we’ll be on our way.”

“Not a problem,” Remy said as he got out, following Logan inside. He smiled back at Remy once, and inside his head, Remy wondered if grabbing Logan and shoving him against the door and kissing the living hell out of him as soon as they stepped inside would be a risky move. What met him as he walked in however instantly killed that thought. It killed his entire mood, really.

In front of him, dressed in a short green dress was Jean, and beside her was Emma Frost. She wore an icy blue dress, one that was slightly shorter than Jean’s  and much lower cut around the front (she wasn’t as conservative as the other girls in school). Remy refrained from letting his jaw drop, but his body went instantly rigid and he forced himself to shut the door a few seconds later, not even sure what was going on.

“Hey, Remy!” Jean said, in that ridiculous, high, fucking annoying as all hell voice. “You look _wonderful_. This is Emma, and she’s gonna come to dinner with us. Just a friendly outing, the four of us!”

Remy looked helplessly between Jean and Logan. He took in a shaky breath and reminded himself of his manners, nodding and stepping forward to Emma. He took her hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing it gently. “A pleasure, Emma.”

Emma seemed to like that very much and smiled. “What a gentleman,” she looked over at Jean. “And _very_ handsome, hm?”

“Hey, what about me?” Logan asked from the kitchen, grabbing some extra cash for the dinner. Remy had nearly forgotten about Logan in all his confusion, and he let go of Emma’s hand and walked over to the kitchen, standing beside him and facing him.

“Double date, eh?”

Logan turned to him and smiled. “Yeah, I thought it’d be fun…” Remy didn’t look exactly happy – he could see through that smile, and instantly guilt twisted in his stomach. “I mean… it was gonna be you, me and Jean, and then Jean wanted to bring a friend too, and she thought you two would hit it off, so I said it was fine and you said you wouldn’t mind going on a date this weekend so I figured it was okay, and…” he took a deep breath, looking over to Jean and Emma, who were rather absorbed in their own conversation. “I thought… maybe you’d want to meet someone.”

“Remy meets plenty o’ people. He’s got Jubes. And dere’s a few ot’ers… but he’s even on friendly terms wit’ de lady who hosts detention on weekends, and she used t’ hate him!”

“But Remy, I’m talking about _people—_ ”

“Dey _are_ people, Logan,” he cut in.

Logan leant in closer, hissing his words out so they didn’t catch Jean and Emma’s attention. “No, I mean people your age! Girls!”

The words cut a bit more than Logan would probably ever know, and Remy jerked back. “… You tryin’ to say somet’in’ by dis? Do you now want Remy around no mo’? Find someone else to take up his time so you don’ gotta see him so often?”

“No, no, not at all? Remy…” he sighed and bit his lip. He didn’t mean to hurt Remy’s feelings at all. What was originally a great plan was now blowing up in his face. “I just… I wanted you happy. And when I say that, I mean someone who can maybe be there for you if I can’t be, or someone who… I dunno, I just wanted to help!”

Despite himself, Remy averted his gaze to the floor, biting into his lip rather harshly and refraining from speaking out. He knew Logan’s intentions were good. They always were. Logan would never want to do him any harm, not if he could help it. But Remy knew who. It wouldn’t surprise him if this was all her idea.

Finally, he looked up again, sighing heavily. “Remy knows you don’ mean anyt’in’ bad by it,” he said slowly. “He just… he didn’ know dat Emma was gon’ be here.”

“Well, I asked if you wanted to go on a date… what did you think I meant, anyways?”

Remy’s eyes widened, and suddenly he felt panic rise within him faster than he could contain it. There was only one other explanation, one way to explain what exactly he thought was going to happen, and there was no chance in hell that he could ever tell Logan any of that. “Uh,” Remy started, trying to fill the silence when Logan raised an eyebrow at him, impatient for an answer. “Well… guess Remy wasn’ really t’inkin’, eh?” Laughing lightly, he punched Logan’s shoulder gently, shrugging and shoving his hands in his pockets. He felt twitchy, nervous, and goddamnit he couldn’t look any more suspicious if he tried. For once, he was glad Logan wouldn’t question him more about this. Probably. “Now c’mon, let’s take dese ladies out, eh?” He walked toward the living room, effectively stopping the conversation dead in its tracks.

He watched Remy for a moment, but the instant he struck up another conversation with Emma, he knew there was no asking about his odd behavior. He grabbing his keys and smiled at Jean, who led everyone out the door. Logan locked up and got in the truck, starting it up so he and Jean were up front while Remy and Emma were in the back. It was a little cramped and Remy felt somewhat claustrophobic, but he could make the time pass if he wanted to. Talking to Emma wasn’t hard – she was a natural at keeping a conversation going, and since Remy was the same, they talked the whole way down. He caught the smiles Jean and Logan passed to each other on the way, thinking things were going well. It sickened him, if he were honest.

When they arrived at the restaurant, they were sat quickly and given their drinks. They looked over the menus, Remy’s eyes unable to leave Logan and Jean. It was like his on-the-go torture.

“So, Remy,” Emma started with a voice as smooth as silk, “anything in particular you’re interested in?”

Remy looked down at the menu again. “Probably de chicken… not cooked de traditional way dat Remy’s always known, but he’s sure it won’ be dat different.” He closed the menu and took a sip of water, looking back at Emma. “An what abou’ you? Anyt’in’ you see dat you wan’?”

“Mm, there are a few things, but…” There was a hand on Remy’s leg suddenly, sensually placed almost halfway up, fingers adding light pressure to the inside of his thigh. “I know exactly what I want.” She looked at him with a gaze almost entirely consisting of desire, and Remy swallowed, his throat instantly dry again. He blinked but forced himself to relax and fall into his normal behavior, smirking at her.

“Dat so, eh?” He grabbed for his water and took another sip, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. He knew in the past, this would have been normal; flirting was what he had been best at. But knowing Logan was there made it feel… wrong. After developing such strong feelings for him anything with another person simply didn’t feel right. Remy sipped his drink slowly, relieved when the waiter came over and Emma removed her hand. He gave his order and Jean for once made a good decision, starting conversation amongst them all. It was pure small talk, so it wasn’t that engaging for Remy, but the first thing that caught his attention was talking about college.

Jean had been going on about her prestigious medical department in the school that she had big dreams of attending. It was yawn-worthy for Remy, and he picked at his bread roll for a few minutes.

“So I’m going to be sending my essays and applications in, but my advisor is confident that they will accept me. All I’ll have to do is get good grades my first year and they’ll accept me into the program the following year. It’ll work out, I’m sure of it. But once that’s done, I can focus more on Logan.” She grinned and looked over at Logan. “Have you looked at any applications yet? They’re not due until next year, but it never hurts to start early…”

“I’ve looked at ‘em, yeah… I just haven’t gotten around to writing anything down… Plus, football and everything.”

“I know,” Jean said, reached a hand out to rest on Logan’s arm. “You’re so busy as it is… but y’know, I guess… now is as good of a time as ever to tell you…”

Logan frowned. “Tell me what?”

Remy fleetingly wondered if Jean was going to admit cheating on him and break up with him.

“Well, y’know how the quarterback’s had all these scouts coming around and watching him play, and how that one boy from the video club was taking videos of him to send to schools?” Logan nodded, and she took a deep breath, obviously excited. “I managed to convince him to shoot some footage of you, and… I got enough to put a video together, and they’ve just been sent. So you may get some letters soon…”

“Jean, that’s… that’s great! I… I never even thought of that, I… you’re the best. Really, you are.” He leaned over and kissed her, cupping her cheeks in his hands and holding her with an incredibly amount of tenderness. Beside him, Emma was ‘aww’ing, but Remy suddenly found his bread roll undeniably fascinating.

When they finally parted after the longest eternity known to man, Logan grinned at Jean, his hand holding hers tightly. “Did you just send it anywhere? I mean, how do you even know where to send those?”

“I sent it around. Needless to say, plenty of coaches will be watching out for you, if they haven’t already.” She smiled deviously, and Remy felt like gagging.

“Well… thanks. That means so much to me.”

“Anything for you, Logan.” She kissed him again, blushing and smiling at him, giggling when he nuzzled her. Once again, Remy was utterly relieved when dinner arrived, and soon they were drawn into more small talk and mindless conversation. Remy was quieter, but he didn’t want to seem any different than before. He laughed when there were jokes and smiled politely at Emma when she put her hand on his leg again. If there were a way he could shake her off, he definitely would have by now.

When dinner wrapped up, they all got back in the car and headed home. It was much quieter than the earlier drive, and now Emma was having trouble _not_ putting her hands on Remy. He’d never actually had a girl so interested in him, practically throwing herself at him.

Well, it wasn’t like Jean was any different.

Her hand was constantly resting on Logan’s arm, her hand stroking up and down slowly. She cast long gazes towards him constantly, and Remy felt his insides go cold. When they got home, it was hard to get out of the truck and walk back inside, because he had the worst nagging feeling in the world about what would happen next.

“Well,” Emma said, almost in a practiced manner, “what should we do now?”

“Maybe you and Remy can stay on the couch for a bit? I’m going to, ah…” she looked over at Logan. “I need to get out of these shoes. And I’m sure you want to get out of yours too, huh?”

Logan frowned and shrugged. “I guess, I…” Almost as if finally understanding what her look was for, he nodded. “Yeah, let’s go.” Jean laughed and grabbed his hand, pulling him down the hallway and shutting the door. Remy had watched them the entire way, feeling utterly helpless. It wasn’t any secret as to what she wanted, and he was almost damn sure that Logan was ready to provide it. Remy smiled quickly at Emma before going to the couch, trying to even his breathing a little. He wanted to get out of here. He had to. He couldn’t stay knowing that Logan and Jean were…

“Well, they’re obviously not coming back,” Emma said in her usual sultry voice. “Not for a while, at least.”

Remy nodded, still trying to swallow the lump in his throat. “O-Oui, s’pose so…”

“So,” she drawled, slowly sitting down on the couch beside him, her fingers already drawing idle patters on his thigh. “Maybe we should find something to do… some way to pass the time…”

His heart began to race. He didn’t want this. He didn’t want Emma. He couldn’t even fathom so much as making out with her, no less going the entire way. “Well… dere are always some movies to watch…”

“C’mon, Remy, don’t even play that card,” she slid closer to him, her hand sliding higher. He opened his mouth to retort, but she’d already leaned in and kissed him, effectively pushing her tongue into his mouth without even asking for permission. Remy put his hands on her shoulders to push her back, but she grabbed his wrists and pushed them against the couch. He kissed her back somewhat, not really even thinking about it, but his mind was still on Logan and Jean, what they could be doing… it sickened him a little.

Somehow Emma had managed to shift their position so Remy was laying back on the couch while she straddled him. She took his wrist and guided his hand up her thigh, clearly ignoring his protests at first. Remy figured there were minimal options out of this, but if he wanted her to stop trying to do all of that, he had to do _something._ Snatching his hands back and holding her upper arms, he pushed Emma off and let her fall back on the couch. She didn’t take it as badly as he’d hoped, and she tugged him down over her, her hands weaving into his hair and pulling roughly. Remy didn’t mind it as much, but he still didn’t want them going any farther.

He tried saying her name, trying to get her attention, but she mistook all of it apparently and moaned his name back, louder than he would have liked. He pulled back to quiet her but she only did it louder, and he rolled his eyes, kissing her to simply shut her up. Every solution he had was even more counterproductive than the last, and he was becoming more annoyed. Making out wouldn’t be the end of the world, he figured… she wasn’t a bad kisser after all – she clearly had a lot of practice… - but she was demanding and pushy, and he knew if he didn’t stop this at some point, it’d go much farther than he wanted.

Her hands started undoing the buttons on his shirt, pushing what little she’d removed over his shoulders. Her lips found his neck and she bit down, making him gasp involuntarily. “Emma, s’il vous plait,” he murmured, trying to push her away again, but she wasn’t having it. Instead, her fingers abandoned his shirt and reached down, finding something that instantly made him jerk back and crawl to the other end of the couch. She stared in shock, looking up at him with disbelief. Remy pulled his legs close, his face redder than it had probably ever been.

“You’re not even…” Emma started, but Remy shook his head quickly, not daring to meet her gaze.

“Non. Pretty sure dat’s clear enough,” he added bitterly.

“Is it… is it me?”

“Non, Emma, yo’… yo’ a wonderful girl. It ain’ you, it’s… it’s Remy, as cliché as dat is.”Remy picked at his sleeve, never once looking up. It was indeed a terrible mistake, because Emma had frowned, not sure what he’d meant, but suddenly realization dawned on her face. She knew then that Jean had been right. At first it had seemed so far-fetched, but being Jean’s friend, she did it for her. Now she knew, and a part of her wanted to run and tell Jean straight away.

Clearing her throat, she sat up, straightening her dress out. “I, uh…”

“Do you wan’ Remy to take you home?” He didn’t want to hear anything more from her. He didn’t want to talk about it. Not with her.

“No, it’s fine… I can get a ride.”

Remy nodded. “Alrigh’.”

After Emma left not five minutes later, Remy headed out to go back as well. Logan and Jean were… well, _busy,_ and he couldn’t get a ride from someone else. He walked out into the darkness of the night, hands in his pockets, wishing none of this had ever happened. How could he have been so stupid as to think Logan would date _him?_ He was clearly interested in Jean, he clearly liked her, much more than before, and Remy was almost entirely out of the picture. He may as well step out of it now while he could.

The walk home was cold, but Remy had been through worse. He stayed in the light of the street lamps, eyes on the sidewalk, kicking rocks as he went. At some point he’d nearly broken down in the middle of the street, but he wiped his tears away and kept walking. He had to stop feeling so goddamn sort for himself. It had been clear for _weeks_ that Remy was losing Logan. He never had a shot in the first place anyways, right? After all, Logan wasn’t gay. He’d made that rather clear to him. So why couldn’t he get that through his damn head?

When he walked in, he barely made a sound when he came inside. A few of the kids were in the kitchen – not Jubilee, Remy thought gratefully – but he gestured for them to be quiet, and they were. He tip-toed to his room and shut the door behind him, changing into a pair of shorts and a tshirt. Even when he laid down, he didn’t cry. He had no reason to, he’d told himself. Logan was Jean’s, and Remy was no one’s. That was the way it was going to be.

\----------

When Remy came to school on Monday, something felt… wrong.

It was the feeling that everyone was watching. And after a brief check, everyone _was._ Confused, he ducked his head low and made his way to his locker, trying not to draw any more attention to himself. He bumped into a few shoulders and heard low snickering from every angle. Anxiety rose within him, but he figured that he was imagining it, that he was somehow paranoid for something… it wasn’t important, right?

When he finally made it to his locker, he opened it quickly, grabbing a few books and shoving them in his bag. He felt a light tap on his shoulder as he closed it and turned sharply, coming face-to-face with Scott.

“Scotty,” Remy said, and Scott raised both hands in defense.

“Woah, c’mon, don’t even start with pet names. That’s just wrong. We don’t even know each other.” A few guys around him laughed and Amara smirked knowingly.

Remy tilted his head a little, but figured he was just giving him a hard time. He hadn’t really protested to it before. “Alrigh’ den… Scott. What can Remy do fo’ you?”

One guy snorted loudly and pushed past Scott, taking a five dollar bill and pushing it into the pocket of his jeans. “He’ll have a quickie, at lunch.” More guys laughed, and Scott punched his shoulder, but he was grinning too.

Remy felt annoyance rise within him. “What de hell are you idiots talkin’ abou’?”

“Oh nothing, Remy,” Scott said. “We just didn’t figure that Jean would have such competition. Guess it caught us by surprise.”

“… Competition?”

“Hey, the whole school knows now.” Scott said with a shrug. “No reason to play coy, LeBeau.”

“You… you don’ know what de hell yo’ talkin’ abou’, Scott.” Remy pointed a finger at his chest, hissing the words out.

Scott pushed his hand aside, leaning close. “I know a guy who _loves_ ‘em feisty.” He pulled back and grabbed the five from Remy’s pocket, pushing it into his hand. “Why don’t you go find him and give him this, huh? He’d be doing you a favor, fag.”

Remy flinched back, their laughter echoing in his head as they walked away. Suddenly he felt closed in, everyone watching and whispering about him. He could hardly breathe and everything became unbearably loud, and without warning, he turned and ran for it, finding the first door and making a getaway. He had to go as far as he possibly could. He couldn’t go back, not then. Especially now that Scott knew, _everyone_ had to know. And if everyone knew… _Logan_ knew.

The thought almost broke his heart; he didn’t want Logan to know, not like this. Any other way he would have taken over this. It wasn’t meant to be a rumor passed around for the enjoyment of others. He wanted to tell Logan his own way, and he wanted him to be the first to know.

But of course, when did anything ever work out in Remy’s favor?

After running from the campus in whatever blind direction he’d taken, he cried. He cried harder than he ever had before, and nothing would stop the tears. It hurt, more than he ever thought it would, but to be fair, he never imagined anything like this happening. He wiped his face again and again, his gloves turning useless after only a few minutes. He cursed under his ragged breaths and wished for all of this to be a dream. Maybe he’d wake up, find himself with Logan, and everything would be fine.

It was a stupid wish, regardless. Logan wouldn’t be there for him. As soon as he’d hear he was gay, he wouldn’t want to hang out with him anymore. Not alone, at least. He’d look at him differently, think that he’d only want to get in his pants or something. It was juvenile, but that was how he was already being treated, wasn’t it?

Stopping suddenly, he looked around and saw a small alley, preferring it far more than the light of the day. People could see him like this. He didn’t want anyone to think he was weak… but he was, wasn’t he? Crying over a boy he couldn’t have, crying because he couldn’t take a few insults. He shuffled into the alley and leaned against the wall, shaking his head and biting his lip to try and stop his sobs. He knew wiping his face would only make it worse, but he did anyways, sitting down against the cold ground and tilting his head back to look at the sky for a moment.

“What should I do…?” He whispered. “None o’ dis… never t’ought dis would happen, an’…” Slowly, he drew his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around himself, desperately needing a hug. “I wish you’d never left, mama,” he murmured, knowing Logan’s mother always gave him the best hugs.

Back at the school, Logan yawned as he walked inside, get a few looks here and there, but he barely paid them any mind. He smiled at Jean when he spotted her beside his locker. They’d been almost inseparable over the weekend after Saturday night, and it seemed like their relationship had taken a great leap forward. He was happy, and he knew Jean was too.

“Hey, darlin’,” he said, leaning down at kissing Jean sweetly before opening his locker. She seemed just as happy today as she had been the whole weekend. “You look wonderful, y’know that?”

Jean grinned and rested a hand on his arm, leaning against him a little. “Thanks…” She wondered how she could bring up such a subject to him, not sure where to even begin. She only knew she wanted to spit it out before anyone else did.

As Logan rummaged through his locker, he looked around. “Everyone seems awful chatty today…” He looked over at Jean. “Somethin’ going on?”

“Well, you could say that…” She tried to keep a straight face. “Some, ah… interesting news has gone around today.”

“Interesting?” He shut the locker, looking down at her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Not really sure how to tell you this, but… Remy, he’s…”

“What happened to Remy?” Logan cut in, suddenly alert. “Is he alright? Where is he?”

“No, he’s—well, he’s not hurt. Not like, physically… but I guess someone found out that… he’s gay.”

Logan blinked, shaking his head a little and opening his mouth at least three times before coming up with a response to that. “He’s… gay?”

“Yeah…” Jean said, trying to keep her tone flat. She didn’t want to try and seem like she was taking a side.

“How do you know? Who told you?”

“All I know is that… y’know, how we went out on Saturday? You and me, then Remy and Emma?”

“Well, yeah. Wait,” he raised his hands and waved them, stopping her from saying anything. “Wait, is this because of that night? Because, well… Remy didn’t really seem… he didn’t really realize that we were going on a double date, or something like that, and he was caught off guard when Emma was there… that’s probably it! She probably wanted something, but he didn’t, and… this _has_ to be a big misunderstanding. This is _Remy_ we’re talking about!!”

“I know, I know, that’s what I was thinking!”

“But?” Logan knew Jean wasn’t done. She sighed and looked a little uncomfortable, not really willing to say what she meant to say.

“Emma… she… she said that Remy claimed it was him that was the problem. And Emma told me that… that he wasn’t… he… he didn’t…” She gestured to her lower area, trying to communicate it to Logan without saying it.

It took a moment, but Logan understood. “Well I mean… c’mon, Remy isn’t just suddenly attracted to every girl he meets!”

“C’mon. It’s _Emma._ No one thinks she’s unattractive!”

“That’s not the point, this can’t be—” he stopped himself, huffing once before taking a step back. “I have to find him. I have to find him, I can’t leave him on his own. He needs me.”

“No, Logan, he might—”

“What, take advantage of me or something? Is that what you want? I know you said you thought Remy was trying to take me from you, but jesus Jean, you can’t see that he’s my best friend and he’s probably hurting like all hell right now?!” He waved her off, turning on his heel. “See you later, Jean.”

Standing, shocked, Jean bit her lip to keep from pouting and turned, marching off. As she turned the corner to walk into her math class, she yelped when she nearly ran into Scott, who almost seemed to be waiting for her. “Excuse me,” she muttered, trying to push past him.

“Hey, hey c’mon, don’t be like that Jean,” he said, taking a small step back. He knew Jean enough to know she at least needed space. She looked up at him and took a deep breath, pushing her own hair back.

“What do you want, Scott?”

“Nothing, just… saw what happened back there.”

Her cheeks flushed red. “Just a little disagreement, nothing more… he’s just rushing to help his friend, that’s all.”

“Well, I wouldn’t wait around too long for your dog to come back.” He shrugged, walking past her, but he turned and still faced her as he left. “He may’ve found some other company, now that he knows someone else is interested in him.”

Jean stood there for a few moments, thinking about what he’d said. She somehow knew that despite the outward jab at her, Scott could be right. She felt a fleeting fear… maybe Logan would find better company in Remy. They were still so much closer than he and Jean were… and now that she was right, now that she _knew_ that Remy was competition, she wondered if Logan would turn to him and leave Jean.

She shook her head and forced herself to walk to class. That couldn’t be. Not after this past weekend. Once Logan knew that Remy actually was gay, he wouldn’t be interested in him. He wouldn’t want to be friends with Remy. He liked Jean, he’d proved it to her. For now, that would have to be what she held on to. 


	7. Chapter 7

Logan eventually gave up searching. He’d looked and looked and looked for hours on end, and he never found Remy. Eventually he went back home and sat outside, watching the cars occasionally go by, wondering if Remy would ever come around. He called his place, each time being ignored. Either they knew he was missing again, or he was home and was avoiding Logan. Either way, when it finally got dark and Logan’s phone read that it was past eleven, he went back inside, feeling utterly useless.

He’d had a lot of time to think over what had happened that day. Remy LeBeau, his best friend, known flirter throughout the whole school (hell, he’d be shocked if the state didn’t know it by now)… was gay. He wasn’t even sure how to take it. It wasn’t like he hated Remy for it or anything; Remy was still his best friend, no matter what that entailed. It just… surprised him. Remy always talked about “the ladies”, claiming this unlimited knowledge about them and what they wanted and how they felt when Logan was utterly clueless.

He supposed it made some things feel a little different. He didn’t feel uncomfortable around Remy, but he couldn’t help thinking about things they’ve done around each other: Remy sleeping in Logan’s bed, Logan carrying Remy to his room whenever he fell asleep on the couch, Logan kissing his forehead and Remy kissing his cheeks. Was it wrong now? Could they not do that anymore? It wasn’t like the world was watching, but Logan wasn’t even sure how to interpret things like that anymore. Was that Remy being Remy, or did he actually mean more by it? Jean could have been right all along. He hated to ever admit something like that, especially since it had seemed like such a ridiculous idea from the start, but… maybe now, it wasn’t so crazy.

Kicking off his shoes was as close as Logan was going to come to changing to go to sleep. He sighed heavily and rolled on his back, thinking now about Remy, if he had honest interest in him… did he want Logan? But more importantly, did Logan want _Remy_?

The thought struck him; he’d never even considered it before. Remy was always his best friend, the kid he’d helped fight off the bullies when they were kids, the boy he brought to his door when he had no one else to rely on, that damned Cajun who couldn’t tell Logan enough about how short he was or about why they always ate out because his cooking skills were beyond shitty. He never thought about _dating_ him… Besides, Logan was with Jean, he couldn’t be with Remy.

After laying in bed for a while, he never quite answered his first question, even after falling asleep.

He woke up the next morning and felt utterly horrible. He checked his phone, paranoid for missed calls, but there was only a message from Jean and a few texts from her as well. He felt a hint of annoyance but pushed it aside, sitting up and stretching. He couldn’t miss practice two days in a row… he had to go to school, whether he liked it or not.

He of course didn’t see Remy all day; at practice, Jean was there, watching diligently. Logan partially wished she’d go home for once, but he knew she was only trying to make up for the day before. Nevertheless, he didn’t take her home after practice. As soon as he’d showered and cleaned up, he called Remy’s, still not getting an answer. He nearly threw his phone, his anger rising up quickly, but he refrained. He instead just tossed his phone on the kitchen counter, went to his room and fell back on his bed, wishing this hadn’t happened. He just wanted to talk to him, that was all. It wasn’t too much to ask, right?

The next day was hardly any different: not a single sign of Remy. A few people were looking at Logan and whispering things about him and probably Remy, spreading more fake rumors about what was going on. Frankly, Logan wasn’t in the mood for any of it. Jean was also keeping her distance, but her longing looks at him from across the class were nearly driving him insane and only made him want to talk to her less. He didn’t need her counseling and he didn’t need her trying to cheer him up. As soon as he saw Remy again and as soon as they talked things out, then he’d figure out what to do about her. Until then, his mind was solely on Remy.

Halfway through practice that particular afternoon, his coach pulled him aside and had him take his helmet off and guided him towards a man who was stood on the sidelines. Logan at first was confused, not sure what this was all about, but as soon as he saw a familiar emblem on his shirt, Logan felt himself straighten up. It had to be a scout from one of the universities Jean had sent the game tapes to.

As soon as Logan’s coach made the introductions, they talked briefly, saying that they ought to schedule a visit for him at their school after the game on Friday (which apparently he’d be attending, which didn’t exactly thrill Logan one bit). Logan felt completely caught off-guard by it, but he knew from Jean that he couldn’t say no to him. They set up a time on Saturday where Logan would receive his private tour and special accommodations for the night, as well as some tickets to the game. He figured it was the coach’s way of trying to show off the team to hopeful prospective students. Still, as nice as it all sounded, he was nervous for it. It was his first visit to a college, probably including some sort of interview, and it that would all decide whether or not he’d receive a football scholarship. He tried as best as he could not to worry about it. Given what else was going on, he had bigger things to think about than pleasing a few coaches at a school.

After practice, Logan hefted his bag over his shoulder and headed out to his car, but Jean was waiting close by. She jogged up to him and walked in step with him, not saying anything. Logan wasn’t going to say anything, that much he knew.

“So uh… who was that?”

“A scout.” He replied shortly.

“Oh… well, that’s exciting, isn’t it?” She smiled, trying to lift Logan’s mood a little, or at least get on his good side again. “Did you make any plans?”

“A visit this weekend, with two tickets to the game.”

“That’s really good. That was very generous of him to give them to you.” She smiled and stopped when they got to his car, not trying to get inside. It made Logan a little less irritated, but he was still upset with her.

“Yeah,” was all he could manage to say to that. He didn’t know what else to do. Jean put on a smile, but Logan could easily tell that it was forced.

“Well, I hope you like the school. Have a good time this weekend,” she said softly, turning and walking away. Instantly, Logan felt guilty. She was the whole reason that scout was here in the first place, the only reason he was being considered for a scholarship. Jean had put this altogether, and now that it had happened, faster than he’d even anticipated, he felt like he owed it to Jean somehow. Having a gut-feeling that he could regret it, he called out to her.

“Jean, wait…”

She stopped and looked over her shoulder curiously. “Yes…?”

“Did you…” Logan sighed, more to himself. “Did you want to go with me…?”

She blinked, surprised. “This weekend? To your tour?”

“Yeah…” he scratched the back of his head. “I mean… he’s here because of you. What you did. And it’d be fun to go to a college game… so if you want to, you can…”

“I’d love to.” Jean smiled warmly, now walking towards him. “You really want me to go?”

“Well, yeah,” he said with a shrug. “You’re my girlfriend, right? It’s the least I can do.”

Jean absolutely beamed at that, and she stepped a little closer. “That’s so sweet of you…” She leaned forward for a moment, but stopped herself. Despite it, it didn’t go unmissed by Logan. “Just uh… let me know when we’ll leave, and I’ll be ready by then.”

“Okay. And, Jean,” he added, pausing again to figure out how he wanted to say it. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry… for snapping at you like I did. It wasn’t really your fault that all of this happened with Remy…”

Jean still smiled, reaching out and taking Logan’s hand. “It’s okay, Logan. He’s your best friend, I know how much he means to you.”

“Thanks.” Logan finally returned a smile. “So I’ll see you later?”

“Yeah, you will.” Carefully, she leaned up and kissed his cheek, laughing softly under her breath when she pulled away. “You’re gonna need a shave soon, mister,” she smirked as she stroked her hand over his jaw.

“I’ll get to it.” He grinned back, pulling away and getting into his truck. Jean smiled and waved, turning and walking back to the school where he figured he was getting a ride. He felt immensely better then, relieved that things between them were working out well. After he got home, he realized then how lonely things were without Remy stopping by. Ever since he’d started dating Jean, he’d been coming over less and less after practices. He didn’t get rides from him to and from school as often anymore (he’d take the bus with Jubilee instead). Things had changed, even though Logan had promised they wouldn’t.

Now, Remy was completely gone from his life, things their lives were completely upside-down, and he was feeling it now more than ever.

It had only been one day, but Logan was getting tired of waiting around. He wanted to talk to Remy again, he wanted to see how he was doing, but Remy – and the people he was with as well – seemed hell-bent on not letting that happen. He dropped his bag in his room and pulled out his phone, dialing Remy’s house. Expectedly, there wasn’t an answer, and Logan simply threw his phone on his bed. On the verge of quitting, he quickly went into the bathroom and turned on the shower, torn between just leaving him be or marching over there and dragging him back to his place. Even thought he was conflicted, he already knew which option he’d choose.

\----------

Jubilee knocked on Remy’s door and poked her head inside. Hunched over on his bed, Remy was drawing something in a sketchbook, focused intently, barely giving Jubilee any acknowledgment of her presence.

“That was Logan again…”

“T’ought it was.”

She watched him for a moment. He was already halfway through that book, and it had barely taken him a week. Focusing again, she forced a light laugh. “Y’know, if you don’t talk to him soon, he’s gonna come over and bust the door down. That’s how he’s always been, huh?”

Her humor was utterly lost on him. “He’ll live.”

“Remy, do you really think ignoring him is gonna help?”

“Jubilee—!” He snapped, looking at her suddenly, but stopped when she flinched. He drew in a slow breath, not wanting to take his anger out on her. “Remy don’ need a lecture on dis right now.”

“I’m not trying to… I just don’t want to see you like this. It hurts, Rem.”

He didn’t lower his gaze at first, his eyes searching hers. Finally he looked back at his book, but he didn’t continue his drawing. “Remy didn’ want Logan to find out like dat. It wasn’… he wanted to be de one to tell him.”

“You still can.”

Remy shook his head. “Be serious here. Logan already knows. De whole _school_ knows.”

“But you can still tell him for yourself.”

Remy didn’t say anything at first, thinking about her words. It wasn’t entirely unreasonable… he figured Logan still deserved to hear it from him. After all, he’d probably have questions… Maybe he really did need to talk to him. He turned towards the door to thank Jubilee, but she was already gone. Smiling softly, he stood, stretching out for the first time all day, changing into better clothes and grabbing a jacket. He stowed his sketchbook away before he left, heading out the front door as soon as he put his boots on.

The walk over was enough time to get his head clear. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to say to Logan, but he was sure this was the right thing to do. When Logan’s house came into sight, he sped up his pace, feeling more anxiety as he neared, but also a desire for wanting to just _see_ him. He jogged up the driveway and hopped up the step to his porch, reaching for the door handle. Before his hand grabbed it, the door swung back suddenly, and they both jumped in surprise.

Logan almost didn’t believe what he was seeing. “Remy…?” Remy stared at him, still frozen on the spot, but Logan didn’t hesitate. “Jesus…” he muttered under his breath, reaching out and grabbing Remy to pull him into a strong hug. Remy still didn’t react, not sure what he was doing, but when he pulled back, Remy looked him over, noting his jacket, shoes, and the keys he had in his hand.

“So you _were_ ‘bout to come over an’ knock down our door…”

Logan chuckled and stepped back a little. “Well, didn’t really think you’d be on your way over. I guess I was gonna bring you back here anyways, if I could…” he shrugged. “Figured the good ol’ fashioned approach was suitable.”

Remy raised an eyebrow. “What, kidnapping?”

Another shrug. “More like borrowing.”

“O’ course,” Remy rolled his eyes. Logan laughed softly, but it didn’t last so long now that Remy’s small smile was gone and the air around them had gone more silent than before. They both knew where this would all lead, but when the time had finally come, neither of them would speak up.

Of course, by the time they’d gained to courage to say something, they spoke all at once.

“Remy, we really need to ta—”

“You prob’ly know why Remy’s here—”

They both stopped, Remy sighing and Logan biting his lip.

“Uh,” Logan started, this time making sure Remy wouldn’t say something. “You gonna come inside…?”

Remy frowned a little. “Do you want him to…?”

Logan actually felt a small pain in his chest at the question. Did he honestly believe that Logan wouldn’t want him to come inside? Growling under his breath, he rolled his eyes and grabbed Remy’s jacket, tugging him inside and shutting the door behind him. “First off, don’t ever ask if you can enter. You’re not dainty. Secondly, we really need to talk, okay? So c’mon,” he pulled again on Remy’s sleeve, but Remy jerked it back, making it slip from his grip. He wouldn’t look into his eyes, suddenly realizing that this was probably going to be a terrible idea.

“Logan… maybe dis isn’t…” He took a deep breath. “If you don’ wanna be Remy’s friend anymore, he understands… it’s alright, really. You don’ gotta be all nice to him befo’ you let him go, Remy gets it—”

“For once in your life, I’m gonna ask you to shut up, and you’re gonna do it. Now follow me.” He grabbed for his sleeve again and pulled on it once before turning and walking down the hall towards his bedroom. A knot twisted in Remy’s stomach but he pushed the discomfort aside, willing to hear Logan out. When he got to Logan’s room, he’d finally let go and walked in ahead of Remy, sitting down on the bed. Remy stayed by the doorway and hesitated, dropping his gaze to the floor for a moment before looking at Logan again. This time, Logan didn’t even say anything; with one hand, he gestured for Remy to come inside and sit down, and Remy did just that. He sat on the edge, maybe three or so feet away from Logan.

“I know this… probably isn’t easy to say. Or, maybe it is, but… I just want you to be honest with me, okay?” Remy nodded, and Logan nodded back, trying to ask in the best way possible. “Remy… are you… I don’t wanna seem rude or somethin’, but… are you really…?”

“Gay?” He asked back, tired of waiting.

“Yeah…” He swallowed but forced himself to meet Remy’s eyes. “Are you gay…?”

Remy didn’t beat around the bush. He nodded. “Oui, he is. T’ough he supposes he’s actually bi, since he stills likes ladies…” Remy fumbled with his sleeves, trying to find any sort distraction, something to hide the shaking in his hands.

“Is that true?”

He swallowed thickly. His voice began to tremble. “… So’ta. He… Remy likes… guys, mo’. A lot mo’.”

“Why didn’t you tell me…?”

“R-Remy wanted to! He… he jus’ didn’ know what to say, he never knew how to get de words out, an… he didn’t want to ruin de t’ing we have.”

Logan frowned. “Ruin it? How would you do that?”

Remy felt a hint of irritation. He looked at Logan, his voice flat.  “Honestly Logan, yo’ really not dat slow. It ain’ rocket science.”

There was a low growl threatening to make itself known, but he pushed it down for the time being. “Just explain it to me then, damnit, if it’s so easy for you to understand.”

Remy sighed. “De school already hates Remy fo’ bein’… fo bein’ who he is. As soon as Remy knew dey hated him – mo’ dan dey do already, at least – he jus’ figured dat you’d hate him as well. You don’ want a best friend who’s gay, who everyone t’inks is gon’ try to come ont’ you. You won’ wanna hang out wit’ Remy alone, not wit’ Jean eit’er… she probably doesn’ like dis, does she? Remy bein’ here, hangin’ wit you… bein’ so close to you…” Remy let out a shaky breath, his voice trailing off at the last part. He had to be honest with Logan now. There was no going back.

“You’re talkin’ like you know what I’m thinking, Remy.” Remy could still hear the previous annoyance in his voice, but despite it, Logan was moving closer to him. Wary, Remy watched him carefully. “Hey, look at me.” There was a brief silence where Remy refused, absolutely sure that he couldn’t manage it, but when Logan reached out and took his chin in his hand and lifted it, Remy became rigid but did as he asked. “How do you even know if any of that is true? You don’t,” he said before he could answer. “You don’t have any way of knowing that I wouldn’t wanna hang out with you, or that I’d hate you for it. Don’t you know me at all?” He dropped his hand then, his expression hurt. “Do you really think I’d do that…?”

Remy opened his mouth to quickly retort, to make up for what he’d said, but Logan was now the one who turned his gaze away. Guilt rose within him and Remy couldn’t find the words to take back what he’d said. Now he couldn’t believe he’d thought any of it in the first place. “Remy didn’… he didn’ mean to make you feel bad, he jus’… he didn’ know how you’d take all o’ dis…”

“But you didn’t answer my question. Did you honestly believe I’d leave you in the dust in the middle of all of this?”

“Remy… He…” In truth, he had no answer. He didn’t know what to say. He’d just assumed the absolute worst possible outcome for all of this. Images of Logan turning his back on him had flooded his mind, the though of being alone filled him with utter dread, and any positive side to Logan discovering who Remy really was went out the window. Bowing his head in shame, he said softly, “Guess… he did.”

Logan let out a deep breath, leaning forward on his knees, running a hand through his hair. Remy knew that he was trying not to be angry with him. He knew he didn’t want to shout at Remy, make the situation worse. It wasn’t easy; Logan knew for a long time that Remy trusted him, and he of course trusted him back. He supposed it was difficult hearing that something like this, something that in Logan’s opinion barely affected their friendship, would cause Remy to believe that Logan would want nothing to do with him anymore.

As Remy waited for Logan to say something, his anxiety began to rise more and more. He could see that Logan was thinking hard about this, but whatever he was going to say didn’t make the wait any more or less worth it. Remy pushed himself back a little further on the bed, crossing his legs and wrapping his arms around himself without thinking about it. “You can tell Remy what’s on yo’ mind, Logan,” he said finally, breaking the tension in the air rather abruptly. “He deserves every word o’ yo’ anger.”

Logan shook his head, sighing. “Remy…” He closed his eyes, clasping his hands together and resting his forehead on them. “I’m not gonna yell at you or something. I won’t sit here and just put you down and tell you how stupid you are. You thinking that I wouldn’t want to be friends anymore because of this, though… _that_ was stupid.” He finally looked up at Remy, but there was something in his eyes, or maybe the quirk of his lips that bordered on a smile that made Remy’s heart stop racing so much.

“So, yo’ sayin’…”

“I’m saying we’re still friends. I don’t think any differently about you. I _won’t,_ alright? You’re still Remy. Taller than hell, sassy as shit, maybe not as annoying as I make him out to be, Remy.”

Remy let out a short laugh. “Remy’d like to know who taught you ‘bout givin’ compliments…”

“You don’t ever turn ‘em down,” Logan pointed out.

“Remy’d hate to hurt yo’ sensitive feelin’s. He knows how you get sometimes.”

“Oh shut it,” he said through a laugh, shoving his shoulder lightly. Remy grinned, feeling more at ease. Logan watched him for a moment, then stood from the bed entirely, taking a few steps over to him, and hopping back on the bed to sit right beside Remy. He hooked an arm around his shoulders and pulled him close, not saying anything. Remy froze for a moment, unsure of what to do, unsure what was pushing a boundary and what was normal anymore. Slowly, he slid his hand around his back, hold him against himself, his hand caught somewhere below his shoulder and just above his waist. “I mean it, Remy,” Logan’s voice was serious again. “I don’t want you thinking anything is gonna change between us.”

The words didn’t make Remy as happy as Logan thought they would. Still, he smiled all the same. “T’ank you, Logan.”

“Don’t need to thank me. C’mon, isn’t this what friends do?”

Remy leaned into Logan’s shoulder, resting his head on him heavily. Friends. It’s what _friends_ did. “Oui. It is.”

\-----------

 Remy sat on his bed for a long time, wondering whether or not this was a good idea. Beside him, Jubilee was kicking her legs idly not saying anything. She wasn’t going to pressure him.

“Remy don’ know,” he said with a sigh.

“C’mon,” she said encouragingly. “You can’t let those dipshits bring you down. They’re being immature because you have good taste in men. It’s no different from guys liking girls and girls liking guys.”

“It ain’ dat simple. People distrust what det don’ understand.”

“But Logan understands, right?”

Remy was silent, but he nodded.

“I know you value his opinion more than anyone else’s in the entire school combined. You can’t let them keep you down like this.”

“Remy knows, Jubes…”

“So whaddya say?”

Remy really didn’t want to go back to school. He really, really, _really_ didn’t want to go. He didn’t want to be stared at or mocked or whispered about anymore. He was so tired of it. But then, Jubilee was right, wasn’t she? He couldn’t let these juvenile, immature kids keep him down. If he didn’t stand up now, he would be stepped on for the rest of his life. With a long sigh, he nodded, reaching out for his bag and heaving it over his shoulder. “S’pose we oughta get goin’.”

“Good.” She patted his shoulder, jumping down from his bed and standing up with her hands on her hips. Remy gave her a faint smile, dread already gathering in the pit in his stomach. “I’ll be right with ya, okay?”

He felt a little better, but he knew she was still much younger than him, so as soon as classes started, Remy wound be on his own. He didn’t mention it to her on the way to school or even as they walked to his locker. Jubilee kept to her word, staying close and only waving to her friends when they crossed paths. Rogue even gave him a warm smile, but Remy swore he could see a difference in her eyes, in the way she looked at him. He forced a small smile back but looked away and kept walking, his head low.

The walk to his locker seemed to take ages; it was as if the closer they got do it, the further away it moved from them. Remy felt all eyes on him, he heard only a few things distinctively – “did you hear about…?” … “can you believe he tried to do that to Jean?” … “he doesn’t belong here” – and they made him want to run again, to crawl into a hole and just let the world go on. It’d be better off without him anyways.

Jubilee seemed to sense his discomfort and started chatting about anything and everything, trying to block out the people around them, taking his hand and dragging him along. When they finally arrived at his locker, Remy opened it and practically hid behind the door, feeling half-nauseated. He was light-headed and a little dizzy, but he shook it off, reminding himself of what Jubilee said to him: You can’t let them keep you down like this.

“Nice of you to show, LeBeau.”

Jubilee stopped talking and Remy tunred around. Of course it was Scott. “Hey Scott,” he said quietly, turning back to his locker, trying to ignore him so he’d go away.

“Haven’t seen you in a few days,” Scott started, moving to stand on the opposite side of the locker from Jubilee.

“Can’t you see we’re having a conversation, Scott?” Jubilee snapped, stepping around Remy to glare at him. “Why don’t you just beat it?”

Remy ducked his head down a little and turned to Jubilee. “Jubes, s’il vous plait…”

Scott laughed. “What, got your little orphan friend to fight your battles for ya? Are you really that pathetic?”

Jubilee growled and took a step forward, but Remy shot his arm out to stop her, pulling her back. “Don’.” He said simply, his voice low but very firm. She relaxed a little in his hold but she still glared daggers at Scott, who currently was having a field day about it.

“You don’t have a shred of dignity left, Remy.” Remy turned to look at Scott, deeply wishing he could tackle him and punch the living hell out of him. However, seeing the group of friends he had around him, it would be five to one. As confident as Remy could be, he didn’t really like those odds.

“C’mon, Jubes,” he muttered, slamming his locker closed and grabbing Jubilee’s arm. She didn’t say anything, just watched with a hint of fear as Remy’s eyes never left Scott’s, even as they walked away. Remy rarely got angry, and even if he was, he didn’t show it often. Scott really knew how to push Remy to his limits, apparently.

“Yeah, that’s it, LeBeau!” Scott called after them, his friends laughing around him. “Go crawl back to your mom and dad—oh, right, you don’t _have_ them, do ya? They never even _wanted_ a fag boy like you!!” The guys around him burst into raucous laughter, and Remy only tugged on Jubilee harder. He didn’t want to hear it. He didn’t want to be reminded. He didn’t want to think about whether it was true or not. His parents did it for the right reasons… they had to… didn’t they?

He shook his head and once he and Jubilee reached the end of a hallway, he finally let go. He hadn’t realized how fast he was breathing, how hard his heart was pounding against his chest. He paced a few steps back and forth, closing his eyes and running his hands through his hair, trying to calm down. He muttered short phrases in French, cursing Scott and wishing the worst things on him over and over. Beside him, Jubilee took a small step back, rubbing her arm and looking up at him with an expression of worry. Remy hadn’t ever been so harsh on her – or anyone – before.

When he stopped after a minute or so, he looked at Jubilee, still silent. He took one slow, deep breath, letting his gaze fall to the floor. He didn’t miss the way Jubilee looked almost scared of him. “Desole, petite…”

“No, no, it’s…” She dropped her arm quickly. “It’s alright. He’s just a douche, okay? The whole school knows it.” She smirked then added, “Guess that’s what made him and Jean such a good couple, huh?”

He laughed softly under his breath, shaking his head. “Oh, non, Jubilee, let’s not get into dat.”

“Alright, but you know it’s true.” She smiled knowingly, and Remy returned it. “You don’t have that many classes with Scott. The day’ll be over before you know it.”

But the day most certainly wasn’t over. At least not as quickly as he or Jubilee had hopes it would be.

Remy sat exclusively in the back for his classes – the ones he attended, at least. Logan sat beside him in their first class, and he smiled at him while Jean joined beside them. Logan’s comforting words from the day before seemed bittersweet, now long gone from Remy’s mind. Too absorbed in one another, Remy bitterly thought to himself about how oblivious Logan was to all of the things happening around him. People were staring, their eyes boring into his very being. They whispered here and there, not as much as they would in the hallways, but Remy’s imagination was hard at work as he tried to figure what they were saying about him. As much as Logan liked to believe that he could protect him from these things, he just couldn’t. Remy knew that truth now.

When class was over, Remy gave a brief goodbye to Logan and headed to his next class, completely alone this time. Again, people looked back at him, pointed, said things under their breath that he couldn’t hear. It was driving him mad, not knowing what was being said about him. By the time the class was nearly over, he was already clutching his book bag, the strap in place over his shoulder. The moment the bell rang, he escaped in record time. He pushed through the crowd of people, unaware that his breathing was fast and his heart was racing madly. He felt slightly lightheaded, again hearing voice all around him. They spoke louder and louder, and Remy jjust about couldn’t take a single second more of it—

“Hey!”

The voices stopped. The chatter in the hall was quieter – still loud, but manageable. “Logan,” Remy said, looking up at him, almost in surprise.

Logan’s expression fell and he frowned. Remy was pale, his eyes rather wide and almost frightened. Concern washed through him and he rested a hand on his arm. “Are you okay? You look… like you’re about to pass out.”

“Non, Remy’s—” someone bumped into him from behind and he tripped forward, reaching out a grabbing Logan to balance himself. “—‘s fine, he’s fine…”

“C’mon, get over here.” Keeping Remy close, Logan led him to the wall and swung his bag around his shoulder, pulling out a bottle of water. He handed it to Remy, who drank it generously. Instantly he felt better, but things were still a little wobbly. “What’s going on?”

“Not’in’,” Remy said, taking a deep breath after taking another sip of the water. He screwed the cap back on and handed it to Logan, who held it tentatively. “Jus’ a lil’ dehydrated, Remy t’inks.”

“You sure?” Logan looked him over carefully, noting that some of the color _had_ returned to Remy’s face, but he still wasn’t sure.

He thought for a moment about telling Logan he wanted to go home, and that he never wanted to come back here. He even thought about what his reaction would be if he told him to stop seeing Jean. “Oui, he’s sure.”

“Alright, well… I’ll see you at lunch, okay?”

Remy nodded. “Okay.”

“Right, okay, uh…” He grabbed Remy’s shoulder, and for the briefest moment Logan and Remy made direct eye contact, and the world around them seemed to slow a little. Logan noticed how uncomfortable Remy looked, how he still held onto his arm tightly and his sleeve was tight in his grasp. Suddenly he thought about how calm Remy became when he’s kissed his hair. He’d been asleep of course, but… he wondered if maybe it would have had the same effect this time…

Logan snapped out of his thoughts, patted his shoulder, and put on a smile for him. “I’ll see you later.” He let Remy go and walked on, trying to figure out why on earth he’d thought about that very moment. Remy’s vulnerability made him protective, sure, but why did he thinking about _that?_ He looked back over his shoulder once, watching Remy make his way through the people, slipping by unnoticed. His heart ached for him, longing do go back, but he forced himself to turn away. He’d see him at lunch, and hopefully by then, he’d forget about thinking those things before.

Remy sat down in his seat heavily, taking a deep breath. He regretted not asking Logan to take him home. If he’d done that, he would have asked him to stay with him. And perhaps he could’ve sst beside him or fallen asleep with him as well. And maybe, if he were lucky and living in a perfect world, Logan would have done all of them unquestioningly.

Jean walked into the classroom and took the seat beside him, something that initially bothered Remy. Most days they simply stayed out of each others’ ways. However apparently that didn’t apply today, because it seemed Jean had something she actually wanted to say to him.

“So, Remy,” she started, looking over at him with that sickeningly sweet smile. “How are you today?”

Remy gave her a strange look, and he knew she’d realize that he thought she was insane right about then. “Fine, Jean.”

The class started then, but Jean whispered on. “Well that’s good. I’ve just been hearing quite a bit of chatter lately.”

“’A bit o’ chatter’? What’re you, forty?”

Jean ignored him. “Lots of people have been talking… mostly about you.”

Remy tensed a little, but he’d be damned if he showed it to Jean. “What does dat matter? Remy _did_ get some new clot’es recently.” He shrugged and straightened out his shirt as if to make a point. “Besides, guess dey’re finally tired o’ spreadin’ rumors ‘bout you.”

Jean smiled bitterly, turning to her notebook to catch up. She idly took notes while Remy just sat back, slouching in his chair. It wasn’t until about halfway through class that she spoke again, making Remy internally groan. “So Logan and I worked things out again,” she started, and Remy frowned.

“Good fo’ you.” He said shortly.

“It is. He’s such a great guy, y’know? Sometimes he loses his temper, but I know he’d never hurt me.”

“Dat a fact.”

“It is.” After a moment, she said, “I’m sure Logan’s never hurt you. Never made you feel bad… or unwanted.”

Remy frowned, then slowly looked at her. She gave him a look of innocent interest, but Remy knew she was a downright liar. From across the room, Remy saw yet another person point at him, looking between him and Jean curiously. He glared, and they looked away.

“Just another rumor, Remy. Can’t let them get to you.” Remy wanted to punch her in the face right about now. “After all, when the school found out you’re gay, they’re kinda eating this up like a frenzy.”

“Well de world should know what’s meant fo’ talkin’ about and what’s personal,” he snapped.

Jean shrugged. “Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.” She smirked then, and Remy felt a knot twist in his stomach suddenly. “Just not _too_ close. Might let something slip.”

He simply looked at her. Nearly a minute passed, and he knew. Everything fell into place: bringing Emma to dinner, knowing what she would do, knowing she would try to make something happen, but knowing that nothing _would_ happen. Making him expose himself to her and make her see that he was gay, that he didn’t like girls, at least not nearly as much as guys. Jean had found a way to make his life hell, and it had damn well worked. If it wasn’t bad enough that she had pushed Logan and himself apart and taken him for herself, she’d taken the extra step and made it so they wouldn’t ever be as close as they used to be.

Logan told him before that he didn’t care, but he _did._ Remy knew it, and Jean knew it too. She didn’t have to be there to know that things were going to change even more than they already had.

Without even thinking, he grabbed his bag and stood from his desk. Jean, still smirking from where she sat, watched as he retreated, made his getaway. It was pathetic, and Jean loved every second of it. He stumbled when his heel caught on the leg of one of the desks, and he felt his face heat up even more and the sheer humiliation caused him to feel anxiety crashing on him again. As soon as his hand found the door handle, he turned it open and rushed out of the room, now running down the hall and out of the school. A few people had tried to stop him on the way, but he didn’t listen. He went all the way home, stopping only once about halfway as he remembered what Jubilee told him again.

“Desole, petite,” he whispered, out of breath. “It jus’ ain’ dat easy.”

\----------

Jubilee carelessly opened her door after coming back from school, closing it behind her and dropping her bag on the floor. She dropped her shoes beside it and yawned, turning back to her bed. Suddenly she gasped and covered her mouth, trying to silence herself.

On her bed lay Remy, curled up towards the window and away from the door, all of his clothes from the morning still on.

“It was Jean,” he said, his voice quiet.

Jubilee frowned, not sure what he meant. “Jean?”

“Who started it. All o’ dis. De t’ing goin’ ‘round de school.”

“You mean… she was the one who started it? She started telling people? But how did she know?”

Remy finally rolled over to look at Jubilee, sighing heavily and keeping his gaze away from her. His eyes will a little puffy and his nose was red, and he sniffled every other sentence. “Remember Saturday when Remy t’ought Logan was askin’ him out? When it was a double date instead, an’ Remy was put wit’ Emma?”

“Yeah?”

“Was not’in’ mo’ dan a setup, Jubes. Jean had a hunch, an’ she was right.” He curled up tighter. “She’s got de school on her side, Logan on her side… she’s got Remy all alone, wit’ his back against de wall. Ain’ not’in’ he can do.”

Jubilee slowly approached the bed, sitting down and resting a hand on Remy’s arm. He closed his eyes and relaxed on her bed, appearing as though he was about to sleep. Frankly, it wouldn’t surprise her if he did; he looked exhausted, and she knew that today would have been difficult for him. He deserved time to rest. Instead, she thought about something Remy could do, something to make school more bearable for him. Anything to make his life a little easier.

The rest of the day and the day after, Remy didn’t leave Jubilee’s side, except for when she went to school on Thursday. When she came back, she found him drawing on her bed, humming to himself, still wearing his pyjamas with his hair nothing short of a mess. Even though he’d slept early and gotten up after her, he still looked tired, but Jubilee said nothing. She still hadn’t quite come up with a way to make things better for him, but she was determined to see it through and figure something out.

Ororo stopped by Jubilee’s room when she came home, ushering her out of the room and pulling her aside. “The school is calling about Remy. They haven’t seen him nearly all week.”

“He’s…” she sighed. She knew she’d have to be honest with her if she wanted her help. “He’s not doing well. Jean told the entire school he’s gay, and now he can’t even go down the hall without someone trying to make his life even more miserable than it already is.”

“I see… I have to go in to talk to the principal tomorrow to explain what has been happening. Of course, _that_ should go well…” She huffed and Jubilee smiled. “I know you will try to make things better… and knowing you, you will do well. Remy trusts you, and he has good reason to.” She smiled at Jubilee, who grinned.

“Thanks, ‘Ro.”

“I’ll let you return to what you’re doing now.”

“Thanks,” she said again, slipping back into the room. Remy didn’t ask what she’d been up to, but even if he’d wanted to, he wouldn’t have gotten a chance. As soon as she got a good look at him, she clapped her hands together and made Remy jump, looking at her with slight alarm. “I know what we’re doing tomorrow, Remy.”

\----------

The next day, Ororo went into the school, sat in the principal’s office, waiting to hear what she had to say.

“Your… Remy has been missing classes quite a bit frequently.”

“I know about this,” Ororo said softly, looking down for a moment. She knew things were going bad for Remy lately. Terrible. Many words of the like. “He had a lot of difficult times as of late.”

“Well we must inform you that despite it, it is not tolerated to miss classes to this extent, especially with you knowing about it and not encouraging him to return to school.”

“Your school is what is making Remy turn away! Your students, tormenting him!” She pointed her finger directly at the principal. “And I would expect that you know _exactly_ why.”

The principal stared for a brief moment, “I assure you, I don’t—”

“You do. You know what they put Remy through. You know how it is out there. Those halls are a desolate place, and for someone who is like Remy, life is nearly unbearable if the world around you shuts you out.” She stood suddenly, leaving the principal in a struck silence. “I will attempt to bring my _son_ back to school, but I will promise nothing. He must come back on his own free will, and must come back knowing that no harm will come to him. This is supposed to be a safe place, but I see now that it is full of ignorance and a severe lack of compassion.” She turned on her heel, striding out. “Have a good day.” And with that, she stepped out and shut the door firmly behind her.

She took a deep breath as she walked out of the main office, passing through the students in the hallway. It had to be a passing period right now, as everyone seemed to have a place to go – that, or they just stood in the middle of the hall with little regard to anyone else. As she neared the exit of the school, she saw someone who looked rather familiar and paused, then realized that it was Logan she’d seen. He was talking to Jean, of course, but that most certainly didn’t stop Ororo.

“Hello, Logan,” she started, and instantly Logan straightened, appearing at first confused, then smiling.

“Hey, Ororo,” he said, putting an arm around Jean. She looked at it for a moment but didn’t dwell on it for too long.

“How are you today?” She asked.

“Good, things are good.” He looked over at Jean and grinned, and she giggled. “What about you? Why’re you here?”

“Remy, as a matter of fact. He hasn’t attended school for the past few days. He hasn’t come out of his room since yesterday.”

“Oh no!” Jean said, gasping softly. Ororo looked mildly surprised she’d said anything, but she had a hunch then that she was simply making an effort to cover her tracks. Her expression turned flat. “I’m so sorry…”  Jean continued, her expression sympathetic. Ororo didn’t say anything to her.

Logan’s smile had faded entirely; he thought they had talked about this, sorted it out. Remy had been okay, hadn’t he? Why was he staying home?

“As a matter of fact, I am on my way home now. Someone must speak with him and make him see that he must come back. He cannot afford to skip school any longer, unfortunately. Though, I’m not sure how much I myself can do…” She looked at Logan for a long time, meaningfully, and then nodded once. “Have a good day, Logan.” And almost as an afterthought, she said, “And you, Jean.”

“Goodbye,” Jean said sweetly. She sighed softly afterwards. “That’s too bad about Remy. But I hope your friend can do something about it.” She smiled and tugged on Logan’s arm. “C’mon, let’s go.”

He thought for a moment, not sure what he should do. Jean was pulling him towards his next class, pulling him away from Ororo and Remy and what he _should_ be doing.

He sighed and finally relented, letting Jean take him into the classroom and sit him down to begin his last lesson for the day.

\----------

“I thought you were good at this.”

“Remy’s rat’er good at dis on ot’ers, t’ough he supposes not so much on himself…”

Jubilee groaned. “Well we need to fix that. Now c’mon, take this.”

There was a long pause. “… You bein’ serious here, Jubes?”

“Just take the damn thing and change into it. All of it. I want to see how it comes together on you.”

Remy groaned and took the clothes into the dressing room. Jubilee folded her arms, leaning from one foot to the other, and waited. It took nearly five minutes, but Remy finally pulled on all his clothes and stepped out, looking unsure. He wore loose blue jeans with a black shirt hidden underneath that hugged his torso perfectly. Over it was a light brown jacket and a red scarf, and altogether, it seemed to suit Remy rather well. The jacket cut off right around d his waist, so his slim figure definitely didn’t go unnoticed. Jubilee grinned and nodded to herself, and Remy finally managed a smile.

“Well,” she said, doing a once-over. “You look hot.”

Remy folded his arms and rolled his eyes. “Dat ain’ news, Jubes.”

“If Logan doesn’t do a double take every time he sees you, I swear I’ll eat whatever spicy crap it is that you eat for a week.”

Remy scowled. “’Ey, dat’s real Cajun food Remy eats, petite. You ain’ ever tried it befo’. Dat ain’ a t’reat if you don’ know if you like it o’ not.”

She waved him off. “Alright, take it off. _In_ the dressing room, thank you,” she added when Remy reached for the button on his jeans. He snickered and walked back into the room while she walked around and grabbed a few more things in the same size. When Remy came out with the clothes over his arm, he looked at a particular shirt and pulled on it a little.

“What abou’ dis?” he asked.

“She tilted her head. Why that? It’s all… I dunno, not you.” She knew it was hard to say Remy had a color that didn’t quite suit him, but the shirt was sky blue and had a black pattern on it that… just wasn’t him.

“Well, Remy jus’ figured… Jean so’ta wears stuff like dis, so…”

“No.” She pointed her finger at his chest, poking him as she annunciated each word. “No, no, no. We’re not dressing you like the whore. So drop it.” She grabbed his wrist and dragged him away. Behind her, Remy was grinning, glad he had a friend like her.

“So,” she continued, “as cliché as it sounds, you need to be you, but just with a new twist. I picked out some other jeans for you in different styles, some other shirt colors and a sorta vest-waistcoat-thing. You really can’t go wrong with it. Your waist and your ass is where it’s at, Remy.”

He felt his cheeks heat up, but he was still grinning regardless. “Remy’s gon’ trust yo’ judgment, an’ de fact dat you’ve probably been spyin’ on his ass to gat’er dat opinion.” He smirked, but Jubilee only shrugged.

“I do my research.” She headed to the counter and set the pile of clothes on it, pulling out the money she needed. “Now you’re gonna go to that game, alright?”

Remy shifted a little. “Jubes, Remy don’ know…”

“No, you do. Jean is just gonna be bundled up in whatever trashy shit she always wears, while you’re gonna be the classiest guy there. You’re gonna get Logan alone and just be with him and show yourself off. She him that you’re worth more than that Jean will ever be. Teach him that that the McDonald’s dollar menu isn’t the only option there is.” She smirked and sent a wink in his direction, and he huffed.

“Easer said dan done.”

“Well I’m sayin’ it, so do it!” She handed the money over, got her change, and let Remy take the bags. “Look, all you gotta do is go to the game with them, talk Logan up, be the main talker tonight. Logan’s probably gonna ask you where you’ve been so kinda sweet that up. Take advantage of the chance, Remy. Then when the game’s over, you have your Friday night like you always do. _Before_ Jean was there. Find a way to get her to leave. But if you can’t, just make her life hell. Serve her right for what she did to you.”

Remy thought about it. It wouldn’t be _too_ hard, but… he didn’t want to seem obvious. That and as much as he hated her guts right now, he wasn’t entirely willing to stoop to her level.

“I know what you’re thinking, but it’s gotta be done.” She looked over at him as he got into the car and started it. “I know you don’t want to become Jean or be like her and do to her just what she’s doing to you. I know what you’re like. But Remy, the world isn’t kind to those who tiptoe and doesn’t stand up for what they want, or what they deserve. A girl like Jean doesn’t deserve a guy like Logan. Logan is, despite his brash and stubborn behavior, nice, he’s caring, and he loves you. Not in the way you want, but he does. You’re his family, and he’s yours too. If Jean was a halfway decent person, she wouldn’t have done what she did. But she did, and there isn’t a way to change that. So you’ve gotta fight back. You’ve done it before, and you’re going to do it again. She thinks she’s knocked you down, but has she?”

Remy paused, then shook his head. “Non.”

“No, because you don’t give up. You don’t give up on Logan. You won’t let this slimy chick take him away. She’s a snake, and you need to get that poison away from Logan, okay? I’m not telling you because _I’m_ telling you, I’m telling you because I know you want it. You just need to accept that what you want comes at a cost.”

“Sometimes, Jubes, Remy t’inks he don’ give you enough credit…” he said finally, his eyes averted towards his lap. “Yo’ right, Remy don’ wanna become like Jean… but mo’ dan dat, he don’ wan’ dat girl ‘round Logan no mo’. She’s bad news, ‘specially if she’s doin’ t’ings like dis.”

“You mean being a bitch?”

Remy managed a small laugh. “Oui, dat. Remy ain’ gonna do somet’in’ like she did, but maybe he can make Logan see dat she ain’ good fo’ her.”

“Good. So, game tonight?”

Remy smiled and nodded. “Oui.”


	8. Chapter 8

When Remy arrived at the game, there were definitely more eyes on him than normal.

Maybe it was the way the jeans hugged Remy’s legs or the way his jacket fit him so well and exposed his slim waist as he slipped through the crowd of people and into the stands. It could have been the scarf that, despite Remy’s fear that it may’ve been too much, kept him warm and matched what he wore rather well. Either way, he made his way through the crowd and looked around, not sure where to sit. He’d normally make do with sitting next to Jean, but that wasn’t so much of an option anymore.

“Remy! Hey!”

He looked over and saw Rogue and Kitty sat on the benches, surrounded by some of the other rally girls. He smiled and went up a few more steps and approached them, standing a little awkwardly until Kitty moved over and made space between herself and Rogue.

“No need to be a stranger, Remy,” Rogue said, patting the space. Remy smiled more this time and sat down, feeling comfortable where he was. The girls didn’t seem to look at him twice, didn’t stare him down, didn’t make him feel so unwanted. When Rogue frowned at Remy’s silence, she leaned forward a little, trying to get his attention a little. “Cat got yo’ tongue, sugah?”

“Uh… non, jus’…” He looked to Kitty – she smiled at him then went back to talking to the girl she was talking to – and to some of the other rally girls behind him and around Rogue. “You don’… you don’ mind bein’ seen wit’ Remy…?”

“Mind bein’ seen with you?” Rogue grinned, treating it like he was telling a joke. “Sugah, yo’ as sweet as a baked apple pie and you don’t mean anyone harm. Yo’ funny an’ charmin’, too.” She blushed for a brief moment, but quickly caught herself and added, “You also look like one ah those models, wearin’ those clothes that look so good on ya.” She winked.

Remy laughed lightly and shook his head, running a hand through his hair and pushing some back behind his ear. “Flattery’s s’posed to be Remy’s department, chere,” he said, smirking at her.

“Well, looks like yo’ getting’ a little sloppy there.” She grinned and bumped her shoulder against his. She knew what he was going through, and she figured that a good laugh or even a smile would make his day better. She’d honestly been shocked to hear the news about him, but even more so that people had been treating him so terribly over it. The only thing she wanted now was to help Remy at least get through it.

“Maybe jus’ a little,” he replied, feeling the tension inside himself lift away somewhat.

The game started soon after, and Remy’s mind was half-focused on the field and half-focused on how to get himself alone with Logan. Perhaps it wasn’t the end of the world if they didn’t get to be alone… but Remy sure as hell would prefer it. Maybe he could get Jean to be distracted for long enough, maybe get her to find something more preferable, say he and Logan were going to do something that she wouldn’t like… or maybe he could go the bare minimum route and simply ask Logan to spend the night with him, and only him.

Like that would go well.

He hunched over and sighed softly, trying to watch the game and let his focus be drowned out. He tensed for a few seconds when he felt a gloved hand rest on his shoulder, moving in a small circle before stopping. “It ain’t the end of the world, darlin’,” Rogue said softly. She never looked at him directly at him as she spoke. “Just tell me if anyone gives you trouble, Remy. I’ll kick their ass for ya.”

To himself, Remy smiled. Somehow he was coming out of this with another friend. “T’ank you.”

She patted his back. “There’s no need to thank me for bein’ a decent human being.”

The game ended, the score not close, but still exciting regardless. Remy stood and Rogue rested a hand on his arm, giving him an encouraging smile. He thought about asking her to accompany him, but he thought over it again and felt he could make it. He couldn’t cling to Rogue all night long, after all. She’d done all she could for him, and it was far more than enough. Taking her gloved hand and bowing low, he kissed her hand like he’d done before, resting his other hand over hers gently as he stood again. He looked at her for a long moment before letting her hand fall out of his grip and stepping away. She was blushing, but her smile was fond and honestly loving.

He made his way down the stands again, keeping his head low and his hands buried deep in his pockets. He didn’t want any trouble, with Jean or with Scott or with anyone. The students left, happy with the win, leaving a few people behind including himself by the entrance to the locker rooms. He caught Jean’s eyes from across the way. She seemed to only regard him with loathing and annoyance, but there was a hint of a smirk on her face that left Remy unsettled. He didn’t know what she was so smug about, but he tried to ignore it for now. He couldn’t let it cloud his mind when he had more important things to think about.

The doors opened and a steady stream of players flowed out. Logan saw Jean first, not giving her a hug or a kiss or anything of the like. It pleased Remy, but he didn’t let it show. It was obvious that Jean was trying to lead Logan around Remy and keep them from seeing one another. Apparently she was more keen on ignoring and avoiding her problems, rather than facing them. Remy wove through a decent mass of people to get to them, determined not to go unnoticed. Jean kept looking over, glaring and likely mentally wishing he’d trip so they could make their getaway, but finally Logan noticed her distraction and looked, and Remy wondered what Jubilee would have given to see his first reaction.

Logan stopped and blinked, not once or twice, but three times before moving a single inch. An array of emotions crossed his face: from surprise, to shock, to happiness. He pulled away from Jean entirely and strode over to him, a grin on his face. “You… You…” He had stopped in front of him and looked him over carefully, taking in all of his features. The well-fitted jeans, that small jacket that somehow worked so well on him, that black, slim-fitted shirt… Logan blinked again as he realized his face was heating up and met Remy’s gaze, noticing how his cheeks and his nose were tinted a light shade of red. He looked better than the last time he’d seen him, but he wasn’t to his normal health. It made his stomach churn a little uncomfortably, but he tried to remind himself that things could be a lot worse. He could have skipped the game entirely.

“Remy…?” Remy asked back, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

“So many things.” Logan said, almost to himself. “I didn’t expect… I mean, I thought… hey, where the hell have you been, anyways?!” He demanded, and now Remy straightened a bit, but suddenly saw an opportunity. It was practically handed to him on a silver platter.

“Well, Remy could explain t’ings… maybe at yo’ place?” He knew that Logan would undoubtedly want to talk to him alone, and as expected, he nodded.

“Yeah, I can take you back with me, I’ll get cleaned up and we can… yeah.”

Remy smiled softly in a fond way. “Oui. An’ ah, what about yo’…” Remy gestured with his chin over Logan’s shoulder at Jean, who looked thoroughly displeased with him at the moment. Seeming to have forgotten, Logan spun around and stuttered, making Jean lean on one hip, waiting.

“I thought _we_ were going to go back to your place tonight…” Jean said slowly, and Logan sighed, scratching the back of his head.

“I… this is important Jean. You’ve gotta understand…” He pleaded with her, and she huffed, not happy about the news at all.

“… I suppose.”

Logan sighed in relief, leaning forward to place a very chaste kiss on her cheek. “Thanks.”

They got back to the car, Remy in the front and Jean in the back. The ride was mostly quiet and Logan played whatever music he could find on his radio, filling the silence. When they pulled up to Jean’s, he stepped out to walk Jean to the door, and Remy looked away after that point. He didn’t care to see whether or not they kissed. There was a fifty percent chance he could lose whatever elated feeling he had about having Logan to himself for the night, and he’d rather not risk it.

Logan got back in and started driving. Remy rested his elbow on the door and leaned his chin in his hand, watching the lights from the window. It was rather dark by now, and the beginnings of Christmas decorations were being hung. Remy smiled softly to himself, his mind imagining the best Christmas gift he could possibly receive.

They pulled up to Logan’s place and they stepped out, Remy walking inside first and Logan closing the door behind them. He went right to the fridge and grabbed a box of cold pizza, tossing it on the counter and grabbing a piece before heading down the hall to put his things away. Remy took a deep breath, the food offered in front of him left untouched. Remy had been so consumed with figuring out a way to get here that he didn’t even know how to start. He walked around the table and sat himself down, his fingers moving restlessly. He drummed them on the edge of the table, tapped a tune to himself, traced a few memorable scratches on the table (when Logan was twelve, he’d found his dad’s pocket knife and thought it would be funny to carve in a target and stand on the table and drop the knife to see if it would hit the bull’s eye).

“Okay.” Logan said when he returned, making Remy jump.

“Do you wanna play cards?” Remy asked quickly. Logan stared at him for a few moments, caught off-guard by the question.

“… Cards?”

“Oui, cards. Play cards, wit’ a card deck.”

“Uh… Cards…” Logan scratched the back of his head, confused. 

“Oui, fifty-two o’ dem, if you’d be so kind.”

He received a stern glare from Logan, which made some of the tension ease up.

Logan went back down the hall to look for some, returning a few minutes later with a rather worn-looking deck. Remy recognized it, but he said nothing; the last thing either of them needed was a sad reminder of what had happened those years ago. The deck was handed to Remy, and he opened it and let the deck rest in his hand, weighing it and shuffling it. The edges were worn, making it easy to pass the cards back and forth between his fingers. Beside him, Logan watched as Remy shuffled, unsure what he was up to. Frankly, he hadn’t seen Remy shuffle a deck in a long time. Not since… well, not for a long time.

“Poker?” Remy asked.

Logan shrugged. The only other game he knew was Go Fish, and Remy had always hated that game. Too simple for him.

He passed the cards and they played a few rounds, the room mostly silent. Logan had assumed that by now he’d have demanded what Remy was up to, why he was stalling, but he never did. He was strangely patient with him, mostly because Remy looked so at ease right then. For weeks now, he seemed on edge and uncomfortable, stressed and frustrated. Right now it was just them in Logan’s house, playing cards like they did when they were kids. They wrapped up another game, Logan losing as he always did and Remy smiling softly to himself.

“I was never any good at this game,” Logan muttered, waiting for Remy to pass out another deck.

“Dat’s ‘cause you never paid attention when you were bein’ taught.”

“And what were you doin’ when we were bein’ taught about cars and transmissions and engines?”

Remy shrugged. “Bakin’ cookies fo’ de hard workin’ men in de field.”

Logan laughed; it wasn’t even a lie, Remy and Logan’s mother always cooked together. “And those were damn good cookies, I’m not even gonna deny that one.”

“Damn right dey were good. Made wit’ sugar, spice, an’ everythin’ nice.”

“Yeah, was the time you put all that hot power stuff in my cookie ‘nice’?”

“Maybe Remy put in mo’ spice dan he t’ought,” he said with a shit-eating grin. With that, Logan folded, putting his cards face up. Remy practically flaunted a Royal Flush with a classic smirk.

“Damn you,” he muttered, collecting his cards and tossing the small pile at him. Remy brought all the cards together, this time not dealing out any more cards. It was a good thing, mostly because Logan was damn tired of losing.

Remy held the cards in his hands, fanning them out and putting them all back together, not meeting Logan’s eyes. He took a deep breath, finally setting the deck on the table. Apparently the distraction had run its course. “Remy’s… he’s sorry, Logan. ‘Bout all o’ dis.”

“You don’t have to be.”

“Non, he does. Fo’ de pas’ few days, he’s jus’ been in his room, not sayin’ anythin’ to ya, never returnin’ yo’ calls, keepin’ Jubes from tellin’ you anything. He jus’ didn’t want you to worry, and he knows now that it probably only made t’ings worse.”

“A little bit...” Remy looked up at him, his expression conveying the hurt he felt that he’d admitted to it being true. Logan opened his mouth to say something, but Remy shook his head quickly and stopped him.

“Well… eit’er way, he’s sorry. Truly. He knows his apologies don’ change t’ings, but he hopes dey can at least make up fo’ de time lost and patch t’ings up between us.”

“I get it… I mean, I sorta do…” He shrugged. “I know you mean it when you’re apologizing. I guess I just don’t get it though… how long have we been friends, Remy? I mean really, it’s like you’re afraid to tell me anything these days, you avoid me one day but then the next you’re making jokes like it never happened. I try not to get mad, but when you fall off the damn planet, I want to know _why._ ”

Remy took a steady breath, keeping his hands from shaking. “He’s jus’… he’s been at home, by himself. He needed to t’ink.”

“Think about _what?_ ” He was raising his voice now; he knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Logan, a lot o’ t’ings have gone ‘round about Remy lately, so he’s had a lot on his mind,” he snapped. Logan growled, growing more irritated.

“I get that, but you don’t tell me any of these things anymore! What happened to us always hanging out together, us always talking until early in the morning, playing video games and talking about all this high school shit? Damnit Remy, I mean, you know we’re still friends even if you’re gay or straight or bi or _whatever,_ but now I keep thinking about how long you’ve been keeping all of this to yourself, how long you’ve basically lied about only liking girls all this time, and I feel like you can’t trust me!”

“We’ve been over dis, Remy never said anyt’in’ because he didn’ know how you’d take it, he was sure you woudn’t wanna hang out wit’ him anymore, and wit’ you an’ Jean, he didn’t want—”

He shook his head and held up a hand to stop him. “Wait, what does Jean have to do with this?”

 _More than you could ever imagine,_ Remy thought to himself. Logan stared at him intently in the silence and Remy swallowed, speaking whatever words came to mind. “H-he jus’… he didn’ t’ink dat Jean would want you hangin’ around him…”

“I wouldn’t care about what Jean thought.” Remy looked up in surprise, but Logan’s expression was pure sincerity. “Jean doesn’t get to decide if I get to hang out with my best friend. I do, and that’s it.”

Remy looked into Logan’s eyes and finally nodded. “Dat’s… dat’s good to know.”

“Should’ve known it all along, Rem.”

He let out a soft laugh. “Remy shoulda known a lot o’ t’ings.”

Logan sighed softly, finally feeling the conversation come to a strange sort of close. Maybe he didn’t get the answers he wanted, but perhaps pushing it too soon wouldn’t help. Remy’s eyes were averted towards his lap, and Logan found himself wishing that all of this – this fight, the tension, the rapid loss of trust between them – would vanish. He hated not knowing what Remy was thinking. He used to be able to read him like a book, and now he could hardly tell what he wanted. It made him feel helpless and useless, and Logan realized that nothing – absolutely _nothing_ – made him feel worse.

“Hey,” Logan said, quieter now.

Remy looked up slowly, curious.

“C’mon. I didn’t bring you over so we could get all down and start beatin’ on each other. Right?”

One corner of Remy’s mouth quirked up. “Non, Remy s’poses not.” He looked down at the cards on the table, reaching for them and picking them up. “What’re you suggestin’ we do?” His eyes met Logan’s, and for some reason, Logan felt himself swallow, thickly. His stomach coiled a little and he became a little tense. Forcing himself out of it, he shrugged casually.

“My go-to is video games,” he said with a grin. Remy rolled his eyes.

“Yo’ never gon’ change, eh?”

“Apparently not.” He stood up then, holding a hand out to Remy.

“Guess Remy wouldn’ have you any ot’er way.” With a smile, he took his hand and let Logan pull him up with a firm grip. Even when they stood, their hands were still joined.

“You ‘guess’ _?_ C’mon, I’m not _that_ bad.” Finally Logan let go, but Remy let their fingers brush for just one moment – if it was all he had, he would take it.

If only he’d known that Logan felt a slight shiver travel down his spine when it happened.

“Non,” Remy finally said. “Maybe not.”

They smiled at one another for a moment. “Well c’mon,” Logan said, grinning again. “I haven’t played Xbox in almost a week now, and I know it’s been even longer for you. Let’s go.” He turned and walked down the hall to his bedroom with Remy following closely, smiling to himself, as he thought for a moment. He couldn’t help his eyes tracing his shoulders as he walked, how they could see the defined muscles hidden beneath his shirt, and the ones simply exposed for all the world to see. His arms filled out the t-shirt he adorned, which emphasized the strength they possessed… Remy could imagine just how strong they were, how well they could envelope him, control him, hold him down against a wall or a bed…

And without another moment to be wasted, Remy reached out and grabbed Logan’s wrist, yanked back hard, and took his shoulders in both hands to shove him against the wall. Logan didn’t say anything – in fact, it was as if he was thinking of doing the exact same thing, but hadn’t been nearly as quick enough. Remy leaned down and kissed him hard, firmly, his hands weaving into Logan’s hair and his hips pressed hard against Logan’s. Logan kissed him back, his strong arms wrapped around his waist and his body fitting so wonderfully against his, and it made Remy want to simply melt against him.

When they broke apart from the first kiss, they locked eyes for a brief few seconds before starting again, this time Logan’s tongue swiping over Remy’s slightly swollen lips, and Remy granting entry without needing to be asked twice. He could barely breathe, but he didn’t dare to pull back, not yet; Logan’s taste was too intoxicating, too addicting, making Remy’s mind race. It was just how he imagined it, all of it. His hold on Remy was unbreakable, refusing any escape, but Remy loved it and craved even more of it. It was possessive and unyielding, everything Logan truly was. As Remy’s heart raced faster and his senses went wild, he realized that he was getting exactly what he’d wanted all this time.

He pulled back to gasp, nearly saying his name, but Logan was quick to cut him off again. He silenced him with another kiss, deeper than any other kiss before, his arms finally releasing him and allowing his hands to slide over his waist and up under his shirt. They were rough on his skin, abrasive in a way, but they never hurt him. Remy didn’t feel anything except for pleasure and deep love for Logan, and finally he was able to _show_ him.

Logan was the next one to pull back, his lips inches away from Remy’s, his breath warm as it intermingled with his own. He was panting heavily, his hands on his hips and his body still pressed against Remy’s. They never pulled apart completely, not like this. He opened his mouth to speak, but Logan kissed the corner of his mouth briefly, silencing him.

“Remy,” he breathed out, his eyes closed. Remy untangled one hand from his hair, resting it on Logan’s cheek. He felt the scratchiness of his beard against his palm, making him smile faintly. Again, Logan spoke. “Remy…”

“Righ’ here, cher,” he whispered, leaning forward to kiss Logan again, but he pulled back. Remy frowned, and Logan said his name again, louder.

“Log—”

“Hey, Remy!” Suddenly Remy’s shoulders were being shaken and his daydream shattered around him. Logan was in front of him, but he was shouting his name, looking right into his eyes as he tried to get his attention. “You there at all?!”

Remy couldn’t even respond for a few moments, struck speechless. “Wh-what?!”

“You look like you’re about to faint, are you okay?”

He was utterly breathless, and with Logan in front of him, holding him and leaning in so close, it wasn’t making the situation any better. “Remy’s… what?”

“You’re all flushed and out of it and you’re all shaky on your feet. What the hell’s going on?”

Remy shook his head, finally realizing that he _was_ about to fall over, and he instinctively reached out for Logan, grabbing on as he tilted back a bit. “Remy’s… he’s fine, he jus’… he zoned out, it’s alrigh’…”

“No, it’s not, c’mon, get in here,” Logan started tugging Remy to his bedroom, and after some resistance (“What the hell is wrong with you, I’m not gonna drag you there if you pass out, so c’mon, get _in_ here!”) he finally followed. Logan sat him on the edge of the bed, kneeling slightly before him, a hand still on his shoulder. Remy held his head with one hand, taking a slow, steadying breath, attempting to push the images he’d practically experienced out of his mind. He’d never imagined something so… vivid. But that’s all it was, wasn’t it? His imagination.

“Are you okay…?” Logan asked, serious once again. “And don’t like to me, damnit,” he warned, and Remy shook his head.

“He’s alrigh’… he is, Remy promises.” Remy reached for Logan’s hand, trying to push him off. Logan’s skin burned on his own, and cutting off the contact between them was a relief. Logan took it as a hint to move back, and when he did, Remy finally leaned forward on his elbows and held his head for a moment, completely ignoring Logan’s presence.

Meanwhile, Logan watched from where he was kneeling, concerned and confused and unsure what to even do at the moment. He wanted to say something, but he had a strong feeling that Remy wouldn’t even be listening to a single word he said.

“Remy’s…” he looked down at the ground between his feet. With a quick movement – too quick, as the world began spinning around him again – he stood and slipped past Logan, heading towards the bathroom. “He’ll be back.”

Logan sighed as the door slammed shut, standing and moving to sit on the edge of the bed. He wasn’t really in the mood to play video games anymore.

In the bathroom, Remy leaned heavily against the sink, turning on the cold water and running it over his hands. He splashed a little on his face and rubbed his neck, cooling himself down and collecting his thoughts. He couldn’t think about that, he just _couldn’t._ It wasn’t right. He was beyond confused, feeling a mix of shame and embarrassment and… well, something that made him feel not so shameful about the thoughts he’d had. They were admittedly _wonderful_ , and it almost felt real. If only he could have the chance to do something like that for real, but not stop in the hallway. They’d go further, Logan would drag Remy to his bedroom, kick the door shut, and they’d both tumble onto the sheets and they’d get completely lost in one another…

“Merde,” Remy muttered, shaking his head harder and splashing more water on his face. He leaned over the sink again and lifted one hand, biting his knuckle hard, trying to deter any and all thoughts. Logan would be getting worried soon…

Sure he would be able to manage, he stepped out some minutes later, drying off the water with a small cloth he’d found. He spared Logan a small smile and walked back to the bedroom. Logan looked up at him and allowed his eyes to follow him as he sat down. “ _Now_ Remy’s better,” Remy said lightly, giving Logan a half-grin. “Dis time fo’ real.”

“So what the hell was all that back there, then?”

Remy shrugged, trying to brush it off as nothing. “He don’ know why he got all woozy like dat. Ain’ never happened befo’.”

“You gettin’ enough to eat and drink? Look, I’m not saying Ororo’s a bad parent or somethin’, but… I know how you get when you’re down. You didn’t even touch the pizza from earlier. And you said you’ve been keepin’ to yourself lately…” Logan sighed. “I just wanna make sure you’re taken care of.”

Remy leaned a little against Logan’s shoulder. It was more like a bump, but there was sincere meaning behind it. “Remy appreciates it. He’s been getting’ food, oui… t’ough probably not as much as he should.”

“Then stay here. Don’t move, I mean it.” Logan stood and sent back a playful glare, then walked out into the hall, presumably towards the kitchen. There was some shuffling around of various food items, but no more than three minutes later, Logan was carrying a big sandwich, an apple, and two bottles of water. “Eat up.”

Remy stared at the food. “No soda?”

“No. Eat.” Logan insistently pushed the food onto Remy’s lap.

Remy sighed and took a bit of the sandwich, chewing thoughtfully before lowering it. “… Got any hot sauce?”

“I’m gonna shove that thing down your throat if you don’t eat it now.”

“Remy’s eatin’, sheesh!” He rolled his eyes, taking another bite, and following it with a swig of water. It was strange, but he was honestly feeling better. He took a bite from the apple, adjusting on the bed a little and taking his time. There was a moment when he held the sandwich, looked over at Logan, and held it out towards him. Logan just shook his head, and Remy knew he’d have to eat the whole thing on his own. It wasn’t so much impossible, just that it was a bit awkward being the only one in the room eating anything.

When he finished, he handed the plate back to Logan and waited again while Logan cleaned the plate to put back in the cupboard. Remy drank up the first bottle of water while he was away, running a hand through his hair and taking a slow, deep breath. Better, much better.

Logan came back, but he only leaned against the doorway this time. One hand held his phone, which he flipped over and over absentmindedly. “What’re you doing this weekend?”

Remy raised an eyebrow, slightly unimpressed. “Yo’ tellin’ Remy dat in all de years we’ve known each ot’er, you don’ know what he’s doin’ on de weekend?”

Logan narrowed his eyes then huffed. “Fine, smartass. How about, do you want to _go_ somewhere this weekend?”

Remy tilted his head a little. “Where?”

“A university.”

“… You mean fo’ yo’ tour dat yo’ takin’ wit’ de football guy?”

Logan nodded.

“But… didn’ you promise Je—”

“You wanna go or not?” Logan asked insistently, not letting him finish.

Frankly, Remy wasn’t going to say no to a chance to be with Logan one-on-one. He nodded, and Logan looked down at his phone and left the room. Apparently he was gonna deliver the bad news. Remy didn’t smile though, not like he usually did when he fucked up Logan and Jean’s plans. It wasn’t about that this time, it felt like.

When Logan returned a few minutes later, he heaved a long sigh and tossed his phone far up the bed, sitting heavily next to him. Remy frowned, knowing that the conversation hadn’t gone well at all.

“Why’d you do it?” Remy asked.

“You need me, Rem.” He said simply. “It ain’t pity, if that’s what you’re thinking.” He looked at Remy sternly, who now looked away and seemed to take it as ‘no arguing there’. Logan didn’t do pity. It never helped anyone. “You need me, and I need you just as much.”

Remy looked back at him again. It was more than he could have ever hoped from an answer

\--------------------

The campus was large and admittedly gorgeous. They went during a school day, Friday, which wasn’t as busy as any other week days, but there were plenty of crowds enough to compensate. Remy and Logan followed the tour guide all around campus, listening to him talk and talk and talk over his rehearsed speech about how wonderful the school was, how many awards it got, and so on. Logan didn’t really care about the medals, more so than he cared about the education he could be getting and the football team itself. As the tour came to a close, the guide handed Logan a folder with a rather cheery smile and dropped them both off in front of the dorms, where a woman inside would show them to their special room for the short stay.

When they got inside the room, Remy instantly noted that it was small (even _his_ room was bigger, and that was saying a lot), but Logan shrugged it off. He didn’t need that much space in the first place (Remy had really been the one to try and push for more of a home-y, warm feeling to his rather dull cave of a house when they first started cleaning it up). Remy flopped back on the twin sized bed and laughed to himself as his feet just dangled off the edge of the bed. “Too short,” Remy commented. Meanwhile he looked over at Logan, who seemed to fit the bed well. “Just right, eh?”

At 5:30, they fetched some dinner on campus to go and went right to the practice field where the current team was meeting. The coach shook hands with Logan and introduced himself, then gave a curt nod to Remy. Remy looked at Logan with a raised eyebrow, but Logan shrugged it off. “It’s because Remy’s scrawny, isn’ it?” he asked when they sat down on the bench by the field.

“Can it, Cajun,” Logan muttered, and the practice began.

It was just like any other practice, to Remy. He wasn’t so much bothered with watching, but for Logan, he didn’t make obnoxious yawning gestures or tap his wrist as though checking his watch. He ate his burger in silence and saw that the team was rather good as it was. Jean had done her research, and she told Logan that they may not be the best, but they could sure benefit from him being there. As much as Remy detested taking Jean’s side, he couldn’t help but agree. Any team would be lucky to have Logan with them.

When practice ended, Logan and the coach spoke to one another for maybe ten minutes, the coach shaking Logan’s hand with a smile and walking to the locker rooms with the team. “You ain’ gonna go in after dem?” Remy asked.

“I’ll be going there before the game tomorrow,” Logan said. Remy shrugged, but figured it made sense.

When they got back to the dorm room, Logan immediately changed for going to bed (it wasn’t that late, but the long drive, the even longer tour, and the practice had worn him down). He turned off the light and Remy changed as well, figuring he’d rather do it sooner than later. Curling up on his side, Remy watched as Logan closed his eyes, his breaths coming slower as he tried to fall asleep. Unable to wait anymore, Remy asked in the darkness, “Do you like de school?”

Logan grumbled something, then asked, “Is now really the time?”

“Remy’s jus’ curious.”

Logan opened his eyes again, turning his head to look at him. “It’s a nice place. It’s got a good feel to it.”

Remy nodded. “Dat’s good…”

“Plus, the coach said that chances of me getting a full ride are pretty good…”

“Yeah?”

He nodded. “Since I’m my own income, I’ve got good grades, and I’m good at football, he said there’s a good chance that I won’t have to pay much out of pocket. Just books and things like that. Everything’ll be covered.”

“Well dat’s somet’in’ to consider too.”

“Yeah.”

There was a short pause. “You excited?”

“I don’t even know if I’m going here.”

“But are you excited? Remy hears all about dese students gettin’ all excited an’ happy about goin’ to college, visitin’ schools, makin’ choices an’ dey can’ decide because all de schools are so great fo’ dem…” Remy shrugged. “Jus’ wonderin’ where you fall on dat spectrum.”

“Well…” Logan thought for a moment. Truth be told, he _was_ excited. About football, about school, what he could do with himself. It’d be perfect, and he’d truly be prepared for the life ahead of him. His parents always wanted him to do well… Logan just wanted to make them proud. More than they could ever hope. They always told him how much they loved him, all the pride they felt and how honored they were that Logan of all kids was theirs to call their own. More than anything, he wanted them to look down and see that their boy was doing alright.

He shook his head a little, that familiar sensation building up in him again. He wasn’t going to get all weepy in front of Remy. “I guess it’s cool, knowing that you’re not just some name to someone. They want me here. Sure, for football, but they’re willing to pay a good price to let me do what I love: football and mechanics. I really couldn’t ask for more.”

Remy smiled for Logan, because he knew that while Logan maintained a nonchalant front, he had a good feeling that this was where he wanted to go. He’d only seen one place, but somehow, he knew.

Remy only wished that the college wasn’t so far away from home.

“What do _you_ think?” Logan asked.

“Ain’ goin’ here, so he ain’ really t’inkin’ so much about it…” Remy shrugged. Logan gave him a rather unimpressed look, so Remy went on. “But it’s nice. Good place, good atmosphere. Rooms are a lil’ small, but Remy’s t’inkin’ dat won’ matter much to you. It’s got de program stuff you want, an’ if dey’re willin’ to pay you to go, why turn it down?”

Logan nodded to himself then laid on his back again. He appeared to be in thought now rather than interested in going to bed. Remy still watched him, still wondering if he was thinking any more about this school or any others that Jean had sent tapes to.

When Remy finally found the courage to speak, he took a long breath and said in a low voice, “De school’s pretty far from home…”

Logan finally closed his eyes, sighing so softly that he knew Remy wouldn’t be able to hear it. He wasn’t annoyed or frustrated by Remy’s words; honestly, he’d been waiting for them, to see if he’d say what he _really_ felt. “I know it is,” he said finally. He wasn’t going to apologize for it though; he didn’t decide where the school was going to be.

As if understanding those exact thoughts, Remy shrugged yet again. “Ain’ no big deal.”

“Okay, don’t open up to me then feed me that bullshit,” Logan said, looking back to him again.

Remy, holding a front, frowned. “What bullshit?”

“’No big deal’? You and I both know it’s a big deal. This won’t be me leaving for a few weeks or training in practices over the weekends. This is college, this is where I leave for nine months at a time and don’t have that many breaks and get caught up in schoolwork and football and all this other stuff. I’m gonna be nearly six hours away, Remy, already in a different state.”

Remy curled up a little tighter. “Desole…”

“Why?” He asked, harsher than he meant to, but damnit he wanted to know what on earth he was apologizing for now.

He flinched a little, but spoke up. “Remy only said dat because he didn’ wanna influence you… make you feel guilty about movin’ so far away. Logan… Remy jus’ wants what’s best fo’ you, okay? He knows dat dis is a huge chance fo’ you. He knows dat college is what yo’ Ma and Papa wanted mo’ dan anyt’in’. Dey wanted to see you do amazin’ t’ings, and Remy wants de same. He wants you to do well, an’ he knows dat you can do dat here. So when Remy says t’ings like dat, it jus’ means dat Remy don’ want some foster boy who ain’ gonna do a lick o’ good fo’ himself in his future to hold back his best friend who can actually _make_ somet’in’ o’ himself.”

There was a tense silence that followed, and Logan watched Remy for every second of it, both just realizing and knowing all along what he’d meant. It wasn’t a secret that Remy wasn’t trying too hard to make something of himself, to further his education. It would be impossible, even with all the scholarships he could attempt. He didn’t have the best grades, and he didn’t have a single cent to spare. He couldn’t provide for himself on his own, no less pay for an expensive education to go along with it just for the _hopes_ of getting a job one day. Now that Logan had a chance, a _real_ one, Remy was – in his own unusual way – pushing him towards it. Urging him to choose university without a single hesitation.

So when he stood up from the bed and grabbed the edge of the frame and pulled, Remy only sat up a little and watched with an expression of utter confusion as he pushed their beds together. Logan slipped underneath his blankets and pulled them up to his shoulder, muttering under his breath about a ‘damn Cajun’ and something about him being ‘unbelievable’. Remy laid back on his bed, but he watched Logan curiously as he fumbled with the blankets and shuffled on the bed to get closer to him. Finally, when he settled, he glared right at Remy. Still lost, Remy looked back and gave him a face that was both uncertain and innocent. Logan rolled his eyes, muttered “goddamnit”, and shifted close to him to throw an arm carelessly over his waist, his knee bumping against Remy’s thigh. Remy made a small, almost inaudible sound of surprise, completely frozen on the spot.

“L-Logan—”

“Don’t make it sound like this is easy for me, but don’t give me that kicked-puppy look either. I know what I want, and I think college is gonna be good for me. But I’ll be damned if I don’t see you or hear from you at all while I’m away.”

Remy, still tense under his hold, didn’t say anything in response.

“I also know that you want what’s best for me. It’s the most unrecognized thing about you. You always care for everyone else but yourself; a good thing sometimes, but you really gotta know when enough is enough and just be straight up honest with me. Tell me what you’re _really_ thinkin’.”

He looked down, his long fingers pulling lightly at the blanket that was held tightly in his grasp. Logan sighed again, his knee bumping against his leg again, this time intentionally.

“And they were _our_ parents, you moron.”

Remy finally smiled.

\--------------------

The college game was as exciting as any other game. Meaning, Remy was leaning against Logan’s shoulder by the end of it, yawning and clapping half-heartedly when they scored. Much to the coach’s pleasure, the home team won, so it left a good impression on Logan as they packed up their backpacks in their room. They were on the road by about 4pm, Remy leaning back heavily in his set while Logan drove them home.

“Dis is de longest drive in de history of humankind,” Remy groaned dramatically, dragging his hands down his face.

“We’ve been on the road for twenty minutes, idiot.”

“Ughhh, Logaaannn,” Remy drawled, reaching for a lever to adjust the seat farther back and laying on his side to get comfortable. “You draggin’ Remy t’rough hell itself.”

“You didn’t have to come, y’know.”

“An’ you didn’ have to be all smart and play football on top o’ dat, but life is shit.”

Logan laughed and rolled his eyes. “Just sleep like you did last time, will ya? Give me some peace for once.”

“Mm.” And Remy did just as Logan asked, closing his eyes and letting himself drift off. By the time he’d woken up again, Logan was pulling into his driveway, parking his truck and turning it off, reaching over to nudge Remy’s shoulder.

“Hey, lazy ass. Wake up.”

Remy mumbled something under his breath. He was awake, but he wouldn’t let Logan know. Besides, a part of him wondered if Logan would kiss his hair like he did last time…

“C’mon, I’m gonna drag you inside if you don’t wake up.”

Remy didn’t respond again, still curled up comfortable on the passenger seat.

Logan huffed. “I’ve got coupons to the pizza place in town and they deliver.”

Remy waited just a few seconds more.

“I’ll even get you breadsticks.”

Finally, he smirked, his eyes still closed. “… Add hot wings an’ you’ve got yo’self  deal.”

Logan couldn’t help grinning, punching Remy’s shoulder. “You asshole.”

Remy opened his eyes and sat up slowly, stretching as best as he could. “So, coupons, eh?”

“I hate you.” Logan grabbed his backpack and stepped out of the truck.

“No you don’, Logan!” Remy laughed as he followed, his own backpack slung over his shoulder. “It’s Remy’s lil quirks dat you love de best.”

“I’m not even gonna respond to that.”

“Only ‘cause you know it’s true.”

Logan rolled his eyes – a clear sign that Remy was in fact the winner of that round – and let them both into his house. Logan tossed his bag on the floor and kicked off his shoes, already pulling his phone out to order pizza. Remy let himself zone out a little while Logan talked on the phone, feeling light and for the first time in a while, happy. It was an amazing relief to have this time with just himself and Logan like it was always meant to be.

“Move over, asshole.” He felt Logan’s hand tugging on his ankle.

“You always know jus’ what to say to make someone feel so good about demselves,” Remy replied dryly, moving so his feet were on the floor and gave room for Logan to sit down. As soon as he did though, the doorbell range, and Remy looked up. “Wow, dat fast?”

“Pretty damn sure that’s not the pizza, smartass.”

“Den it ain’ wort’ getting’ up fo.” As if to prove his point, he draped both of his legs over Logan’s lap, preventing him from standing. The bell rang again.

“C’mon, I gotta see who it is.”

“Non, y’don’t. If de person on de ot’er side o’ de door don’ start callin’ about a fresh, hot pizza, Remy ain’ movin’ a single inch.”

It rang once more. “Jesus, now it’s getting annoying,” Logan muttered, finally picking up Remy’s legs and tossing them haphazardly on the floor. Remy pouted at Logan but he was striding towards the door, opening it before the bell could be rung again. Remy tried to sit up enough to see who it was.

“… Jean?”

“Surprise!” Jean said cheerily. Remy’s brows drew together, confused.

“Wh-what—when did you get here? I mean, how did you know I was back?”

“Well you were saying that you’d be back tonight, and I just got off work, so… here I am!” She grinned and slowly stepped inside, which made Logan jerk back a little, realizing he’d never invited her inside. He flushed a little bit at that, wondering why it’d never even crossed his mind.

“Yeah, we just got back, and I was ordering food… I was gonna call you.”

She cleared her throat a little, taking off her jacket and hanging it on the coat hanger beside the door. “Well, there’s no need. So how was the school, did you like it?”

“Uh, it was good, yeah… They showed us around campus and all that, took me to see the practice and the locker rooms, all that stuff… they talked to me a little about the program they have there, but it’s mostly on their website, so… yeah, I can read up on it later.”

“Good, good,” she was still standing beside the door, all smiles and happiness. “So, how was the game? Did you have fun?”

Remy felt his loathing come back for her. She kept asking questions about Logan, Logan, Logan. She was completely avoiding and mention of Remy.

“Yeah, we did,” Logan replied. “Well, Remy was getting tired… he’s not that much of a fan of football anyways.”

“Oh, I know. He never has been, I can tell. He’s hated the spirit weeks ever since he first came to the high school, hasn’t he?”

Remy’s anger grew, seething a little now. Logan seemed to feel something like it too, since he frowned at her and narrowed his eyes a little. “I don’t really care if he likes it or not, the fact that he shows up is what matters. It means he cares.  He’s been at every game for me since the beginning of high school.”

“Well he’s missed a few recently, hasn’t he?” She asked, matter-of-factly, like she was trying to prove something.

Remy felt guilt wind up in his stomach, but Logan swept in to defend him. Remy began to wonder if Logan had forgotten about his presence just ten feet away. “You _know_ he’s been having a lot of shit dumped on him lately. He’s had other things on his mind.”

“True, but it’s not like he’s had anything else to do the whole time. He doesn’t have a lot of people to hang out with, aside form you. But I guess it doesn’t matter,” she cut in before he could say anything. “So, did you take him home already?”

“Actually, non,” Remy finally said, standing from the couch and walking around it slowly, practically stalking towards Jean, his eyes dark and damn near dangerous. “He hasn’. But seein’ as Remy’s got not’in’ else to do, he’ll be on his way.”

Jean was struck into a state of speechlessness, but Logan stepped around when when Remy walked towards the door, reaching out for his arm. He tried to speak, convince him to stay, but Remy spoke first. “T’anks fo’ de road trip, Logan. It was a good time.” He gently pushed Logan’s arm off, grabbing his bag and slinging it over his shoulder. “He’ll be seein’ you around, maybe.” And with one small smile, one brief and subtle grip on his forearm to assure him that it was alright, he walked out. It was well passed dark, but Remy would find his way home.

Inside, Logan stood helplessly behind the door, his jaw dropped slightly. Things had been good again. Things had been _great._ They’d finally gotten back some semblance of what they used to be, and a two minute conversation had wrecked _all_ of it. Logan turned to face Jean, who seemed to shrink at his gaze. Logan didn’t bother trying to be gentle or considerate. She had hurt Remy, terribly, and Logan wouldn’t let this one slide at all.

“What the _hell_ was that?!” He demanded.

“I… I didn’t know he was there!”

“Why were you saying all that shit about him? Even if he _hadn’t_ been there, I’d still be pissed. Remy’s been through so much fucking shit lately, and you go and say _that?!_ What is wrong with you, Jean? What has Remy ever done to you, or _anyone_ for that matter?!”

“I—Logan, I didn’t—”

“Don’t you even _dare_ tell me you didn’t mean it.” His voice was low, menacing, and Jean hadn’t ever heard something to threatening in all her life. “I’m starting to think you’ve got something against him. You really do. What, are you still thinking he’s trying to get in my pants or something? All because he’s gay?”

“Logan—”

“We’ve been best friends for god only knows how many fucking years, and the minute he’s _forced_ to come out because someone couldn’t help but spread a damn rumor, everyone turns against him and everyone is convinced that he’s been after me all along! What he likes and who he likes is his own business! I don’t care, Jean, I don’t, and if you’ve got a problem with it, there’s the damn door!” He held out an arm towards the exit, waiting. A strenuous silence filled the room, with Jean’s eyes directed at the floor, tears building within them.

“I just… I was scared, I didn’t…”

“You don’t have a damn excuse. Not one.”

“Logan, you don’t get it!”

“Y’know, if you’ve got a problem with Remy, why not just keep it to yourself? Is it news to you that we’re best friends?!”

“He’s been trying to sabotage us from the beginning!!” She shouted back, finally finding the courage to look at Logan again.

“What?! Jean, you’re crazy—”

“Am I? Remy being your “rally girl”? Hanging around, trying to make me feel unwelcome—”

Logan shook his head. “Remy wouldn’t.”

“Well he did, Logan. He made sure I knew who was the first one here.”

“So this is all Remy’s fault, huh? It’s all his fault and he’s the one that caused all of this?” Logan narrowed his eyes again, stepping just a little closer, but to Jean, it was daunting. “Something’s tellin’ me that this isn’t the first time you’ve wanted to say something bad about him.” He paused, then added, “Or _do_ something bad to him.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” Logan stepped back, turning a little bit. His hands were balled into tight fists, shaking at his sides uncontrollably. He didn’t want to hurt Jean, not unintentionally. “Y’know, I’ve never been able to figure out who started that rumor. But now I’m really thinking about it, for the first time. And y’know what?” He turned back to Jean. “I should’ve thought about it a long time ago.”

Jean bit the inside of her cheek, her breaths coming faster. Logan took her silence as some sort of confirmation that he was on the right track, so he went on.

“You were the one who told me that Emma tried to get together with Remy that night, and that it hadn’t worked. You were the one who invited her along on that date in the first place. I remember that when you told me that you wanted to bring Remy along for the first time, I was surprised. But I was so caught up in the fact that you two maybe would start getting to know each other, I didn’t see what you were _really_ doing, huh? You were trying to set him up… but not with Emma. No, Jean, you were setting him up to have him confess that he didn’t want Emma. You _wanted_ Remy to be gay, because then you’d have everyone he ever knew to turn against him, and you knew he’d run. You thought I’d push him away because I wouldn’t want a best friend who was gay. But you were wrong, Jean. Dead wrong. Remy is the only family I’ve got, and he’s been there for me through everything. You thought you knew me, but you don’t. Not as well as you thought you did. I don’t care what Remy is, I know what’s inside. That’s what matters.”

Again, Jean was quiet. A few tears had fallen as Logan had talked, but it didn’t faze him. It didn’t make him rethink anything. He knew he wouldn’t regret a single word.

“Am I wrong?”

Jean opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She sniffled and wiped her eyes, looking down again.

Logan turned again, rubbing his face in disbelief. He gave a single, bitter laugh. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Jean covered her mouth as she sobbed softly.

“Jean, I… I need you to leave.”

“L-Logan, _please_ …”

“No.” he shook his head. “You need to go home. Call your mom, dad, I don’t care. You need to go, and I’m not taking you there.”

She choked back a small sob, then turned, grabbed her coat, and walked out. Logan didn’t look back, he didn’t even think twice. He pulled out his own phone and called Remy’s place, letting the phone ring a few times before someone picked up. It was past ten, so there was a chance that no one would answer…

“Hello?”

Logan closed his eyes, relieved. “I need to talk to you, soon.”

There was a short silence. “… It’s fine, Logan. Remy’s alrigh’.”

“What did I say about feeding me bullshit?”

Remy didn’t reply.

“So can I come over?”

“Non, let… let Remy come back over.”

“I’ll pick you up in ten.”

“Remy can walk. He’ll see you.” He hung up without another word.

Logan sighed and dropped the phone in his pocket, running a hand through his hair and walking back out front. Jean was standing on the sidewalk, still in the light, but a car came by that looked like her mother’s and took her away. Logan sighed and turned away. They were over… they’d broken up.

It didn’t take very long, but Remy came up his driveway no more than fifteen minutes later. Logan opened the door for him without him even knocking, letting him in and closing the door behind him. He looked around the room tentatively, as if waiting for Jean to come out, to say something or apologize or anything. When he didn’t spot her, he look up at Logan, unsure what was going on.

It took a few seconds, but Logan finally spoke. “We broke up.”

The news caught Remy by surprise. “What?”

“I told her to leave. I’m not seeing her anymore.” As he said it, it seemed to hit him right then what he’d actually done. There was a small ache in his chest, but he wasn’t sad over what had happened. It more had to do with Remy, who had been suffering all along, and never said a single word. “Did you know?”

Remy frowned. “Know what…?”

“That she was the one who started it.” He looked at him closely, watching his expression. “The rumor.”

Remy sighed, turning his head to look away. “… Oui. Remy figured it out.”

“But why didn—” he stopped himself mid-shout, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. “Sorry… I just want to know… why didn’t you tell me?”

Remy couldn’t help himself. He smiled softly, shaking his head a little. “Would you have believed him? Honestly?”

Logan, in all honestly, wasn’t sure.

“Remy don’ blame you, Logan.” He looked at him again. “He wouldn’ have expected any different. He didn’ wanna get between you an’ Jean, eit’er.”

“I almost wish you had…”

“Guess dat wasn’ how it happened, eh?”

“No… God…” He turned and walked towards the couch, sitting down heavily.

Remy followed and sat beside him, resting a hand on his shoulder carefully. “You alright…?”

“I am… I mean, I think so… I don’t know…” He sighed. “It’s hard, it all happened before I could think about anything. I just… exploded. I couldn’t hold anything back… I may’ve been harsh on her.”

“To be fairly honest, Logan… Remy ain’ complainin’.” He smiled a little sheepishly, and Logan returned it.

“It’s weird, though… I’m not sad. Not really. I thought I would be, even though I was so angry at her when she left. I thought I’d regret it the moment she stepped out the door… but somehow, I don’t feel that regret. I know it’s for the better that she left. I couldn’t let her stay, not after that… She was so heartless then.”

“Remy personally t’inks she’s been heartless all along… T’ough really, he’s got no right to say dat…”

“No, you… you do. She did a lot of bad things… to you, I mean. It wasn’t right.”

Remy’s smile faded. “Wait, you… did you break up wit’ Jean because o’ Remy?”

Logan furrowed his brows together. “Well… yeah…”

Remy’s jaw dropped in disbelief. “Logan, why did you do dat?!”

Logan blinked, confused. “I don’t—why does it matter!?”

“Remy shouldn’… he shouldn’ be de reason you do dis! He isn’ a part o’ yo’ relationship, he’s… Logan…” He leaned over and held his head in his hands, feeling utterly guilty. “Remy can’ believe dis…”

“Remy, she was horrible to you! She treated you horribly! I wasn’t gonna sit there and let that go on. I wasn’t gonna date her knowing she did that to you! I don’t care what you say, I just… I didn’t think you’d be telling me to go back to her!”

“Remy’s not sayin’ dat…”

“Then what _is_ it?”

Remy sat up again, biting his lower lip. He was happy, honestly happy, that they were apart. He knew for a while that Jean was bad news, but… he didn’t want to be the one to have come between them. He didn’t think it would end like this. He envisioned them breaking up mutually, or Logan seeing that she was bad all along – not because of what she did to Remy, but for other reasons… he wasn’t sure, but either way, he felt awful. He took away Logan’s happiness. He may’ve been blind, but he was happy with her. Sometimes ignorance was bliss, and for Logan, he’d had a lot of bliss in his short time together with Jean.

“Remy,” Logan pleaded, moving a little closer. “Just… tell me what you’re thinking. I don’t know what I did, I thought… just say something, anything.”

He took a deep breath. “Jean, she… she wasn’ always wrong.”

“… What do you mean?”

“It means… she may’ve told you some t’ings… dat may not have been as crazy as dey sounded.”

Logan gave him a look of half irritation and half confusion. “Remy, what the hell are you talk—”

And without letting him speak another word, Remy leaned across the small space that separated them and pressed his lips directly against Logan’s.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yes, it's been nearly three months. School and personal things have kept me VERY occupied as of late, and I don't think that's going to change until I'm on Summer break. 
> 
> So, I really hope this is moderately worth the wait. It's not my best work, I don't think, but I really need to move the story ahead at some point, and this is going to have to do for now. 
> 
> (Also Southern accents are a thing I despise with all my being, so Rogue's dialogue is a little strange... sorry about that. )

The first time Logan had kissed Jean, his mind had been racing. Thoughts were jumbled in his mind and he could barely comprehend that it was _happening_ , that he was kissing her and everything was as it should have been.

But as he sat, stunned into a frozen position, his hands up but unmoving, nothing went through his mind. He drew a blank as he tried to catch up to speed and realize that Remy was kissing him. Remy, the person he'd grown up with, the person he was closest to, his _family,_ was kissing him on his lips _._ In a single moment, the already fragile state of their friendship was completely shattered - at least to Logan - and he was left with only one thought: Remy had wanted him, and judging what he had said just a moment ago, Remy had wanted him for a long time.

All of this happened in a few brief moments, and by the time Logan came back to reality, he still felt the firm press of Remy's lips against his - thin, he noticed, but still very warm and very... welcoming. Logan's shoulders relaxed a little, which seemed to encourage the grip Remy had taken on the front of his flannel shirt. He was pulled closer, and Remy shifted just a little, the space between them decreasing...

... and with a sharp movement, Logan finally put his hands on Remy's shoulders and shoved him back.

Remy appeared breathless, while Logan didn't dare breathe at all. His heart was racing and his mind was still without a single comprehendible thought, not even sure what to do. He'd acted on pure instinct alone, completely unfamiliar with what was happening right then. As he looked into Remy's eyes, searching for some sort of explanation, there came none. Remy instantly stood from the couch hurriedly and his expression went from half-dazed to utterly broken, but Logan didn't even think to reach out to comfort him.

"I-I... Remy's..." Remy swallowed thickly and his face turned red from embarrassment, his hands shaking as he backed up slowly. "D-desole, he... he didn'... desole..." And he turned and did what he could only think to do: run.

Logan didn't stop him.

The door closed with a sharp slam behind Remy as he ran as fast as he could carry himself. He thought the day he'd ran from school was bad, he'd thought running from Jean was worse, but nothing, absolutely _nothing_ , could ever compare to the way his heart was being torn in two. Logan's face... the look of horror and confusion, how he shoved him back with such force... he'd never wanted it. He didn't like Remy, not in such a way. He never would, especially after the rather forward move Remy had made on him.

Logan sat still on his couch, staring ahead as if Remy hadn't just run out, as if he hadn't even _been_ there. Remy... all this time... it explained so many things, but made many other things all the more confusing. When Logan had convinced himself that Jean was wrong about Remy wanting him, he'd brushed off those closer-than-normal moments as simple fondness between them. But in truth, Logan was just being blind, unable to see Remy's true desires. Finally, Logan sighed heavily, his eyes falling to the floor as he rested his forehead in his hand. If Logan thought Remy had been keeping secrets before, this was the biggest of them all.

"God damnit, Remy," he murmured, and even saying his name made his stomach churn uncomfortably. He groaned and rubbed his hands over his face, suddenly feeling exhausted and tired and wanting nothing more than to sleep. Anything to avoid this. He would face it later, maybe he'd sleep straight through until the morning, but now... it wasn't a good time. Logan turned and without even bothering to change or turn out the light, he fell onto his bed and pushed Remy out of his mind long enough to fall asleep. But even his dreams were clouded by the uncertain thoughts, and rest didn't come well at all.

\--------------------

When Remy had stood two streets away from his house, he'd stopped. His chest heaved and his breaths came out in full clouds in front of him as he tried to calm his racing heart. His face felt unusually cold, and he realized that it was wet with tears. He cursed under his breath and wiped his cheeks furiously, sniffling loudly to himself. It was pathetic, he told himself. He shouldn't be crying over Logan. It was stupid, dumb... Logan didn't love him, or even _like_ him. Simple fact.

It still didn't change the other fact that Remy's heart was torn in two.

Sighing, he looked around, wondering what he should even do now. He didn't want to go home. He obviously couldn't go back to Logan's place. All he knew was that he was depressed, angry at himself and the world, and wished he could forget all of it.

A strong drink sounded like just what he needed.

Catching his breath after another minute or so, Remy wiped his face again and made sure his crying hadn’t been so obvious. Sure, his eyes would still be puffy, but he could only hope he wouldn’t run into anyone who would question him about it. It wasn’t hard for him to go unnoticed around here, Remy thought bitterly. Clearing his throat and standing up a little taller, he proceeded down the last two streets towards his house, quietly opened the front door and took off his shoes. He padded through the main entrance and slipped into his room with surprising ease, closing the door and turning on the light. He went straight for his closet, pushing aside the few coats he had and reaching up on his tip-toes until he could reach the top shelf. It was a small, faded box, nothing too special, but when Remy pulled it down, the heavy weight of all the things it held brought a small smile to his face.

He cast the lid aside and started digging through the box, pushing aside a worn deck of cards, a hand-made lock pick, and some other small memories. After moving the things inside the box, he found the card he needed. A fake ID was going to get him just what he needed.

“Hopefully dis works as well as de las’ time…” He murmured to himself, pocketing the card, grabbing some cash, and heading back out the way he came. He was nearly out the door when Charlie and a new young boy named Kurt stopped him. Kurt was very different from the other kids - spontaneous to appear when you least expected him, and his German accent was very thick. In a way, Remy appreciated it, simply because it was strangely comforting to not be the only one who, according to other people, “talked funny”.

“Remy, where are you going?” Kurt asked, his innocent face tilted to one side.

“Out, Kurt,” Remy said with a small smile, trying to keep the conversation short.

“You haven’t been around to play much lately,” Charlie said, a pout on his lips.

“Remy knows, but…” He thought for a moment, biting his lower lip briefly. “How about tomorrow, Remy plays wit’ you? He’ll make some time, he’ll do his best, he--” He stopped himself; he couldn’t make promises. Never make a promise you couldn’t keep. The thought stung, and Remy took a slow breath before speaking again. “Remy’ll play wit’ you soon, alright?”

Kurt seemed to take the answer - any answer was better than none for him, he figured. “Okay, Remy!”

“You boys be good, alright? Don’ give ‘Ro too much grief, o’ Jubes fo’ dat matter.”

They nodded enthusiastically, and Remy smiled, grabbing his shoes and pulling them back on before heading out the door, He held the ID in his pocket, hands stuffed in his coat, walking with his head down as he tried not to think. Just focus on getting there, he told himself. And he did just that. Managing to keep Logan out of his thoughts most of the way until he’d reached the door of the bar. He looked up at the sign - a low neon ‘open’ sign was the only indication that the run down building was even in business.

Remy wondered for a moment if he was making a good decision. Was drinking the best way to solve his problem? Was drinking the best way to forget the night, forget _Logan,_ and make his problems go away for one night?

A few people stepped out, stumbling a little, but they were laughing. They were holding each other and enjoying life, even if it would hurt a little in the morning. Remy wanted to laugh. He wanted to feel carefree. Drinking was worth it to them. It had to be worth it to Remy too.

He stepped inside the bar and walked up to the counter, flashing his card to the bartender and ordering a beer. He wasn’t exactly a regular drinker, so he had a feeling he was a lightweight. That, and he had to find a way back home. Stumbling around late into the night wasn’t going to help that.

The bartender gave him his drink without batting an eye. Cautiously, Remy lifted the bottle to his lips, trying to act casual as he breathed in the scent. It smelled… odd. He’d had a different kind before for Logan’s last birthday, but it was much cheaper than this kind. Remy ignored the smell and drank from the bottle slowly, grimacing a little at the taste, but he didn’t think it was all that bad. Shrugging lightly to himself, he drank again, and once more not even a second after he’d lowered the bottle from his lips. He turned towards the rest of the bar and watched the people around him. Many were laughing, meeting new people; a combination of good times and promising evenings for some made Remy feel emptier than before. Why couldn’t he have that? Why was it that when he wanted something, it was swiftly taken away from him? Why was life always so _cruel_ to him?

Remy finished his beer before he realized it, and he stared down into the emptiness with a confused expression. It hadn’t even been more than a few minutes, had it? His fingers felt a little strange, his head a little cloudy, but… he didn’t mind it so much. His throat felt dry and he turned to the bartender to order another drink, and within seconds another bottle was placed in front of him. Without thinking, he took another drink and looked out on the people again.

His eyes fell upon two guys sitting farther back in the bar - clearly only friends, but Remy couldn’t help but see himself and Logan in them. They smiled and laughed, occasionally looking together at a group of women. Probably seeking dates. Remy fondly remembered all the times he had pointed to girls in the lunch room, or when they sat in the food court at the mall and Logan caught sight of a girl he liked. Remy always nudged his arm, egging him on, when really he wondered why Logan never looked at _him_ that way. What was he doing wrong that made Logan not want to be with him? They got on better than any of his other friends, girls or guys. They’d been there for each other through nearly everything. Remy knew he couldn’t force Logan to want him, but… _damnit,_ Remy wasn’t doing _anything_ wrong!

Remy let out a long breath to calm himself down and turned back to the bar. The beer, half-empty in his hand, was tasting better than it had the first time. The sensation he’d felt a few minutes ago was definitely spreading; he felt his posture slipping and he couldn’t seem to set the bottle down for too long before he wanted another sip. If there was an alarm going off in the back of Remy’s mind, he ignored it.

Two beers turned into four, and when the bartender had given him a fifth, he gave him a strange look; or at least, it was strange to Remy.

“Wha’?” He asked, and right when he heard his own voice for the first time since he’d left his own house, he knew he sounded _different._

“Nothin’.” The bartender said, giving him another once-over. “You’re takin’ those in pretty fast there.”

“No one ask’d you, m’nsieur,” Remy replied with an idle wave of his wrist, hunching over the counter now. He felt heavy, and sitting up only made his head spin. He could only imagine what standing would do, no less walking. But where would he walk to? Why leave? Things were fine here…

Remy nursed his beer slowly this time, his breathing coming much slower and his eyes feeling heavy. Maybe he could lay his head on the counter for a moment. It looked comfortable, after all…

“Hey, buddy.” The sharp voice made Remy sit up quickly, which in turn caused the world to shift right before his very eyes. If everything would just sit still for a moment, he could focus. “C’mon, if you’re gonna make a home of the bar, it’s time to go. Pay the tab and give the seat to someone who wants to _buy_ something.”

“Y’...” Remy shook his head slowly, trying to make sense of what he said. “Y’ want R’my to wha’...?”

“Leave.” His voice was sharp and clear, but to Remy, he was barely making sense. “You’re being cut off, got it? Pay and go.”

Remy frowned. “Wha’, R’my can’ stay?”

The bartender was silent for a moment before he replied. “No, you can’t. Beat it, kid.”

Remy scoffed at that, pulling out some cash from his pocket and putting it on the counter. It was nearly all he had, but he couldn’t even fathom trying to figure out how much he owed. “Remy ain’ no kid, m’nsieur.”

The bartender worked through the cash for half a minute and tossed the remaining back with little care, keeping a large tip for himself without Remy’s knowledge. “I don’t care what you are, but you’d better leave before there’s trouble.” He folded his arms and waited impatiently, his eyes narrowed and fixed solely on Remy. Remy glared back, slowly standing from his seat and fighting back the dizzy feeling he had. He didn’t feel sick, but rather slow. Like everything around him was a few seconds behind, not to mention he felt like he was trudging through a swamp.

When he finally made it outside (thankfully without tripping or stumbling too much), he hissed at the cold night air. It bit at his cheeks and sent a shiver down his spine. He pulled his coat tightly around himself, looking around and wondering which way he ought to go. He had to get home. Home was where he needed to be. Home… He shook his head and tried to refocus. This was going to be harder than he first thought.

He took a few steps towards where he thought he lived, only to be put entirely off balance by a girl who had just stumbled out of the bar, laughing and giggling when she collided with him. Remy nearly fell, his balance already beyond question, but he caught himself on the wall and clutched at it tightly to keep from tumbling. The woman straightened up (well, as straight as she could manage) and apologized profusely, moving in close and making sure he was okay while invading his personal space to an extreme level. She laughed again when she was sure he was fine, and Remy – though his vision surely couldn’t be trusted and his mind behind an impenetrable fog – thought she was rather attractive. It was a strange realization, given what had happened so recently, but Remy wasn’t thinking things through too much tonight. Being at the bar was proof of that.

“Y’okay?” She asked, her breath heavy with the smell of sweet alcohol. Remy, unsure of himself and his ability to speak, nodded quickly.

“Y’know,” she started again, her voice a somewhat loud whisper, “you’re really cute…”

Remy blanched, swallowing thickly. “U-uh… d-desole… er, non, Remy means merci… t’ank you.”

“Remy?” She grinned and Remy was almost taken instantly by her smile.

“Oui, dat’s his name…” He stood upright a bit, trying not to seem so dependent on the wall.

“You’ve got a strange accent… but it’s really lovely…” she said it almost dreamily, her expression seeming to be somewhere else entirely. “Like your eyes. And I love your eyes.”

 _I’ve always loved your eyes._ Remy shuddered a little, the sudden memory flooding his mind and making his heart ache. He sighed and nodded. “T’anks.”

Almost as if realizing her mistake, she opened her mouth to say something, but a much taller guy stepped up behind her, putting a hand on her waist and looking down at Remy. “Somethin’ goin’ on here?” He was clearly more sober and more interested in nothing else happening between Remy and this girl.

“No, I was just talking to Remy—“

“Well stop.” He gave Remy one look and grimaced. “Beat it, freak.”

Again, she opened her mouth, but Remy stopped her. “It’s best Remy leaves, anyways. Adieu, mon chérie.” He smiled a little and stepped away, his eyes on the girl’s, which appeared sympathetic. He had a feeling her heart was in a better place than his was, and he could only hope that either he changed, or she left for someone who could appreciate that more.

He turned and kept close to the wall, not wanting to lose balance or run into anyone else who would knock him down. His eyes were turned towards the ground and his heart felt heavier than before. It seems like no one, not even a complete _stranger_ , could ever get close to him. Not without being taken away before he could even have a chance.

\--------------------

When Remy first woke up, he knew two things: his world was assuredly spinning in circles, and it was _far_ too bright. He brought an arm over his eyes and groaned, turning into what he was sure was his bed, though he had no recollection of ever getting into it the night before. How had he returned home? Before he could figure it out, something shook him, making his head pound more than it already was, and Remy used his free arm and waved it in the general direction of whatever was trying to wake him.

"Remy..." Jubilee shook him again, receiving only a louder groan in return. She huffed, reaching out and grabbing his shoulder. "Hey, c'mon. Wake up, we've got to go to school, remember?"

Ororo overheard Jubilee and looked into Remy's room. "Jubilee? What are you doing?"

She finally let go of Remy's shoulder, much to Remy's relief. "Trying to wake him up. We're gonna be late if we don't get going, and he's not moving!"

Ororo stepped inside his room, gently placing a hand on Remy's shoulder. "Remy...?"

Again, another groan in response. Ororo frowned and pulled back, taking Jubilee's shoulder in her hand and guiding her away. "He doesn't appear to be feeling well. Just inform the school when you arrive so I don't receive another pesky call from that principal."

Jubilee smirked briefly at Ororo’s bitter tone, but cast a worried look back to Remy and shrugged. "Okay… You think he's sick?"

She paused before answering her. "I'm not sure. I was asleep before he returned, so I don't know how long he was out last night. He may be sick, but I'm uncertain. He needs rest, more than anything. That much I know." She stopped by the front door and opened it for Jubilee. Smiling assuredly down at her, she placed a hand on her shoulder. “He will be better by the time you return.”

Gaining comfort from her words, Jubilee smiled back. “I know you’ll make him better.” She stepped out the door and Ororo watched, her chest feeling a little tighter. Perhaps she could not be the true mother to these children, but at the very least, she could give them a family they deserved.

Ororo eventually turned away from the door and walked back to Remy’s room, watching him from the doorway. He looked exhausted. She walked inside silently and sat carefully on the edge of Remy’s bed, stroking a hand over his hair, watching him for a long time, sighing to herself. He had left late enough as it was, and Ororo most times expected that meant he was staying at Logan’s. For some reason however, he had come back… Ororo could only imagine what had happened. She knew they had hit a rather rough patch… she only hoped that nothing too terrible became of it.

Logan was all Remy had, after all.

\-------

Logan sat in class, the seat next to him empty, and sighed heavily. He hated this. He hated being alone in the halls every day, he hated how people whispered behind his back. He hated how the bleachers were empty at football practice, but more than anything, he hated that Remy wasn’t here. Jean obviously hated _him_ for what he’d said to her nearly a week ago now. News of their breakup had spread quickly, and it seemed like everyone was taking Jean’s side. Not that it was entirely misplaced – Logan _had_ broken up with her, and not particularly in the best way, either. But for God’s sake, he hadn’t pushed her out the door and thrown her onto the street. He didn’t physically abuse her or push the limits of what they wanted. The rest of the school seemed to have a different opinion though, and he was almost certain Jean’s friends were spreading rumors and false allegations like wildfire. Every other class earned him a glare from across the room, either from Jean or one of her friends. At first it had annoyed him, and a part of him felt guilt as well. But he’d grown used to it, and he stopped caring soon after that. Nothing weighed on his mind nearly as much as Remy’s absence.

Five days already. Five days of school and Remy hadn’t shown up once. Normally at this point he’d be desperate to know where he was, searching out Jubilee and calling every chance he got. This time, he hesitated. Was it because they’d kissed? He couldn’t help but shiver a little at the thought, but he felt his cheeks warm up at the same time.

Ever since they’d kissed, he’d felt confused. Remy was his friend, his _best_ friend… and he’d kissed him. Logan still didn’t know what to think of it. Remy liked him in a way that was more than best friends. Aside from that, he knew nothing else. Did he like Remy like that? He’d really never given it any thought, mostly because he’d never looked at Remy and imagined a future together with him, not in the sense Remy likely was. It didn’t answer the question: Remy was an attractive guy, and no one could deny that… did that mean Logan liked him too?

Shaking his head, not wanting to think about it, he made a vain attempt to focus on the class again. For once, he actually wanted to be fully invested in school, just so he could forget everything else.

\--------------------

Jubilee walked in through the front door and went straight to the kitchen, throwing her bag down carelessly and opened the fridge to find something to eat. She opened a can of soda and rummaged through the drawers, finding some lunch meat and cheese and figured a sandwich would be good to eat.  She’d only just finished assembling her meal when there was a light knock at the door. She groaned and put down her sandwich, her stomach growling loudly in protest. "Soon," she said to herself, opened the door, and stood for a few seconds while blinking in surprise.

"… Rogue?"

She smiled lightly, almost apologetically. "Yeah, hi, Jubilee..."

"Hi..." There was a pause, both of them standing awkwardly. "Did you need something? Did something happen? I mean, sorry about the questions, but... you've never been here."

"No, I know, I just... I was hoping I could talk ta Remy."

Jubilee tilted her head a little, still perplexed by the entire scenario. "Well, you can _try_ , but to be honest, he hasn't come out of his room for almost a week. So I mean... you can have a crack at it, I'm not gonna stop you, I guess." She shrugged.

Rogue smiled and slowly stepped inside, setting her school bag down by the door. "I won't take up much of your time o’ hospitality." With quick directions from Jubilee, she walked into the large house and looked around as she approached Remy's room. There were quite a few rooms in the hallway Jubilee had directed her down, and she couldn't help wonder just how many kids lived here.

When she found Remy's room, she took a deep breath before lifting her hand and knocking gently. There was a stirring from inside the room after a moment, and before long, the door was opened and behind a cracked-open door stood Remy, looking - to put it lightly - worse for wear.

"R-Rogue?" He asked, shaking his head a little when he realized just who it was. He looked down at himself - his wrinkled clothes and his messy hair, the fact he hadn't shaved in maybe a week already. He knew he looked like a disaster. "What're you... why'd you come here? How'd you even know where Remy lived?"

Rogue shrugged. "I have my ways, sugah." She smiled at him, then with a softer expression, asked, "Would you mind if I talked ta ya for a minute or two...?" Remy bit his lip without thinking about it, but Rogue seemed to read his thoughts. "You don't gotta be in a fancy get-up t' talk ta me, Remy."

After a moment, he shrugged, then stepped back and help the door open a bit for her, turning on the light much to his own displeasure after she walked in. He closed the door then rubbed his eyes, getting used to the light while Rogue looked around for a moment. It was in a state of utter disarray and there were papers and clothes strewn about. She looked back at Remy and smiled softly. “I’m sorry about comin’ so unannounced…”

“Non, it’s fine. Remy was jus’... takin’ care o’ some t’ings.”

Rogue nodded, looking at the floor again, not really convinced in the slightest. “Can I sit down?”

“Oui, oui, desole.” Remy quickly stepped around her and made his bed hurriedly, giving her space to sit. At this point, it was probably the only non-messy surface in the room. “So, uh…” He scratched the back of his head, sitting down beside her slowly, but keeping his distance, “dere somet’in’ Remy can help you wit’?”

“Nah, I just came to check up on you…” She smiled gently at him, keeping her voice soft.

Remy frowned a little. “Check up on Remy? He ain’ sick, if dat’s what yo’ t’inkin’—”

“No,” she stopped him short. “You’ve been gone this whole week, Remy. The school knows about Jean and Logan…” She didn’t miss the way Remy flinched at the mention of Logan’s name. “Y’know, honestly, I thought you’d be jumpin’ fo’ joy at that. Isn’t this sorta what you wanted…?”

“Oui, it was…”

“Then what is it? Did somethin’ else happen?”

Remy was quiet for a few seconds too long. “… Non. Not’in’ happened. Dey broke up, it’s over.”

“Don’ you dare lie ta me, Remy LeBeau.” Rogue narrowed her eyes at him, and she swore Remy shrunk back a little.

He sighed, long and slow. “Remy don’ wanna talk about it, okay?”

“Remy, I never like pryin’, but… I’m worried about you, alright? When I don’t see you at school, I wonder what’s goin’ on with you. I worry that something happened, that Scott’s done somethin’ because you know that boy would do it. I know you’ve been through enough as it is, and I want ta be there for you. I want ta be your friend, because going through these things alone… it hurts. It’s the worst feelin’ the world.”

Remy watched her, his stomach churning slightly. “You say dat like dere’s somet’in’ mo’ behind it.”

Rogue shrugged. “I guess. When a breakup goes bad and your ex ends up in a coma, it doesn’t go over that well…”

“What?” Remy could only imagine what had happened. “A coma?!” When Rogue looked hurt at his exclamation, he bit his lip and looked down, ashamed. “Sorry… didn’ mean t’ say it like dat…”

“Nah… guess the vague-ness of it made it seem pretty bad. I mean, he was drivin’ me home after our date hadn’t gone that well… he wanted… well…” She shrugged, and Remy understood. “I wasn’t ready. I sure as hell didn’t appreciate his name-callin’ and accusations on the ride back either. If I don’t want a boy touchin’ me, he ain’t gonna touch me. He wasn’t too happy about that, and I told him that if that was his priority in us, if that was all he cared about, then we were through. Thing was, while he was yellin’ at me, he wasn’t watchin’ the road, and…”

“Oh…” Remy reached out carefully, placing a hand on her shoulder. She didn’t move away or seem averse to his sympathy, so he kept it in place. “Remy’s sorry, chérie …”

Blinking back tears, she forced a smile and shook her head. “What’s done is done. Everyone was convinced I’d done something, even my parents… my own _family_ thought I’d caused this, and for a while, I began thinking I _had_ caused it… either way, I had no one ta talk to. Not a damn soul wanted ta listen ta me, they didn’t care about what had happened before. All they knew was that we broke up, the car was wrecked, he was in a coma, and I came out with only scrapes and bruises.”

Remy allowed his hand so move over her back and around to her other shoulder, pulling her closer to himself. He knew what she had gone through, with Jean spreading rumors about him before when he’d refused to be with Emma. No one cared that he was uncomfortable with the situation. They only cared that he had turned down one of the most gorgeous girls in school; he _had_ to be gay if he didn’t like Emma Frost. They were right, to an extent, but never had he felt so alone in all his life. And coming from a boy who had lived on the streets for most of his childhood, that was certainly saying something.

“But Remy,” she spoke again, her voice still a little shaky, but stronger now. “My point is that, you shouldn’t be facin’ this alone. It can really do terrible things to a person, break them… and I don’t want that ta happen ta ya.”

“Remy’s already beyond repair, Rogue,” he smiled weakly, squeezing her shoulder. “But de fact that you wanna take a hand at tryin’ to do good says a lot about ya. T’ank you.”

She smiled and leaned into him. “There’s no need ta thank me, Remy.” There was a brief period of silence, both of them sitting quietly and enjoying one another’s company. It was peaceful for once, and knowing that Rogue had gone through something similar to what he had, it made him speak up.

“… He kissed him.”

Rogue’s brows came together. “… Who kissed who?”

“Remy…” He took a slow breath. “Remy kissed Logan. An’ Logan shoved him away, an’ Remy left befo’ anyt’in’ could be said.”

She nodded, quiet for a few seconds. “I see…”

“Oui. Remy really screwed up…”

Rogue shook her head. “Remy…”

“Non, Rogue. Remy fucked up. He fucked everyt’ing up. De two o’ us were fine, and Remy had to do… _that_ , and now he’s ruined our friendship…”

“If you and Logan are as good of friends as I think you are, then you’ll get through this. I know how much he means ta ya. He cares a lot about you.”

“An’ Remy cares about him...” She pulled his arm from around her shoulders, eyes locked on the floor. “Maybe he should go talk to him, set things straight, pretend dis never happened…”

“No. Remy, maybe… maybe this time, you should let Logan come ta you. After... I’m just sayin’, Logan may need some time ta think, ta sort all this out. I don’t want you ta rush it and have something horrible happen.”

He gave her a disbelieving look. “Y’mean somethin’ _more_ horrible?”

Rogue looked away, feeling guilt coil in her stomach. “I didn’t mean…”

Remy waved her off, shaking his head. “Desole… Remy didn’ mean t’ make you feel bad.”

She smiled lightly. “It’s alright. But like I was sayin’, approachin’ him too soon may just… get you some bad reaction. I don’t know Logan nearly as well as you of course. I just think maybe this time, don’t go runnin’ after him to fix the things you think you did wrong. Do you regret what you did?”

Remy opened his mouth, but stopped himself. Did he really regret kissing Logan? It was probably the best moment of his life… The only thing that would have made it better would be if Logan hadn’t pushed him away. He shook his head slowly. “Non, Remy don’ regret kissin’ him.”

“So I don’ want you apologizin’ for doin’ somethin’ you don’ regret.”

“But Logan—”

“Logan needs ta get over it and talk ta you himself. He can’t just expect you to run back t’ him every time somethin’ goes on between you two.”

Remy nodded, but he wasn’t entirely convinced. He still felt an obligation to go find Logan and talk to him himself. Rogue did have a point that most times, Remy went to Logan first and apologized to him; maybe this time, Remy needed to be patient. He just wanted things to go back to normal… but was there really any going back at this point?

“Yo’ right, Rogue,” he said. “Remy’ll wait dis time. He won’ go runnin’ after Logan.”

“Good. Now, am I gonna be seein’ you at school next week?”

Remy’s small smile faded. He shrugged, his attention drawn to the floor yet again.

“C’mon, Remy…”

“Remy’ll go back, but when he’s ready… dat may take some time.”

“If you want, I could bring your homework? I’m sure the teachers would appreciate it if you didn’ drop out the last term of the school year…”

Remy laughed a little. “If it ain’ any trouble fo’ you, Remy wouldn’ mind dat much. He could send it wit’ Jubes in de mornin’.”

“Sounds good.” She stood from the bed, smiling. “Well, I’ll be seein’ you soon.”

“You sure will, chérie.” She turned to leave, but he stood and spoke up. “And, ah… t’ank you. Fo’ all dat you said.”

“Like I said, Remy. There isn’t any need ta thank me.” She stepped up to him and rested a hand on his cheek. “That’s just what friends do.” After a moment, she stepped back and turned, letting herself out. Remy watched her, still smiling for a long time afterwards. The pain was still there – it was impossible to ignore – but he felt much better than before.

\--------------------

Remy was thankful beyond words for bye weeks. It meant Remy didn’t have to miss an official football game, and it meant he didn’t have to ask around for a ride or walk to the school by himself in the dark. Even in the difficult time they faced, Remy didn’t dare miss one game Logan played. It was their tradition, and while it wouldn’t have played out the same way it used to, Remy wanted nothing more than to show his support as a friend. Tonight however, Remy could stay at home and be a little more at peace knowing that there wasn’t a game for one more week.

The weekend that followed was quiet, and Remy truly hated it. It only served to remind him of all the times he and Logan had spent on weekends… which led to him remembering when he’d kissed Logan, and his mood was instantly through the floor again. He stayed in his room in the dark, drawing by the light of his lamp and only coming out for food, which was rare. When he did eat, Ororo made sure what he ate wasn’t just a piece of toast or a small apple. She wouldn’t force him to eat more than he wanted, but she didn’t want him starving either. Her attempts at making him talk were all in vain at this point, and Remy assured her that he would be fine. When that would be, she – nor anyone else – knew.

When Monday came around, Rogue was walking home with Jubilee to bring Remy his homework. They got on rather well, and Remy was glad to see Jubilee smiling and laughing as they came inside. Rogue handed him his assignments and gave him her number on a slip of paper, just in case he had any questions. On the back of the paper, it read: _‘Call for anything you need. Anything.’_ Remy knew her intention was good and sincere.

While Remy worked on his homework, Logan went to his practice as usual, looking to the stands every so often, wondering if Remy would ever show his face again. He realized just how lonely it was without his best friend sitting here, doing whatever it was he did to kill time. It never mattered to Logan if he watched or not; he was there, and it had meant the world to him. Now he practiced alone, he had nothing to look forward to when he got home, and the rides back to his place were quiet in the worst possible way. He stepped out of his truck and grabbed his bag, walking inside and hoping that Remy was waiting inside to scare the living hell out of him. He opened the door and turned on the light, not realizing he had been holding his breath, and when he’d stood there for a solid minute in silence, he tossed his bag on the floor and shut the door behind him. He went straight to the shower and stood until the water went cold, and after turning it off and drying himself, he got into shorts and a shirt and laid in his bed, eyes fixed on the ceiling.

He missed the way Remy would jump on the bed and bother him about how starving he was until Logan ordered pizza. He missed how Remy would curse at the screen when they played video games. Logan even missed the tricks he played, whether it was with some damn riddle or with playing cards; he was exceptionally good at both. He missed his laugh and his smile. He missed the way he would steal his clothing without asking and wear his shirts – rather well, something in the back of Logan’s mind noted. Sighing, Logan turned his gaze to the empty space next to him and thought back to the last time he’d laid here beside him. They had been talking about his parents, and Logan had told him how he’d always loved his eyes…

He felt something twist in his stomach and he forced himself to roll his eyes, turning over in his bed and pulling the covers haphazardly over himself. Maybe ignoring his thoughts for a little longer would make this all go away eventually.

\--------------------

The sun was nearly setting when Logan’s practice was over. It was the regional game this weekend, and their team was in the top bracket. This win would be the perfect way for Logan to end his season and his high school career. However, it meant long practices and hard workouts. He was glad to get his Wednesday practice out of the way now, since those were usually the worst. Only one more, Logan told himself as he packed his bag and went back to his truck. One more practice and then the game on Friday. Until then, he did what he usually did: drove home alone, grabbed something from the fridge to eat, showered, then went to his bedroom.

Another evening of pure silence. He considered just going to bed now since he had nothing better to do, but he wasn’t tired enough. Remy was yet again on his mind, and he swore he was going to lose it if he didn’t do anything about it. His father always told him that if he wanted something done, he ought to do it himself… so that’s what he was going to do. He sat up and jumped out of the bed, unable to take it anymore. “That’s it,” he muttered, grabbing a jacket and pulling on a pair of shoes, taking his keys and heading out the door. 

The drive over was short, the walk to the front door was short, and the answer from Jubilee was short as well. She stared up at him, awestruck it seemed, and Logan decided if he wanted to get anywhere before he had doubts, he asked, “Is Remy around?”

“He…” Jubilee looked over her shoulder, then stepped out onto the front step and closed the door behind her somewhat. “Are you sure about this…?”

“More sure than anything.”

Contemplating it for a few seconds, she finally let out a breath and stepped back, letting Logan in. “Don’t make this any worse, alright? You’re probably the only person on earth that can fix this.”

He frowned, wondering if that was actually true. Was he really the only one who could do anything about this? Surely Ororo or even Jubilee could say something… He pushed the thought aside, walking in and making his way down the hall towards Remy’s room. He closed his eyes as he stood in front of Remy’s door, hoping this would all work out. It had to… he needed Remy back.

He knocked three times on the door and waited. There was a low sound of shuffling. “Remy ain’ hungry tonight, ‘Ro,” said the muffled voice beyond the door. Logan bit his lower lip and spoke back.

“It’s, uh… it’s me, Remy.”

Silence followed, and Logan began worrying before the door clicked and slowly opened. Remy seemed shocked to see Logan standing there, and at the sight of Remy, Logan couldn’t deny that he was a little stunned by his appearance as well. He just looked… tired. More than he’d ever seen him before in all the years he’d known him.

“Listen, can we… can we talk?”

Remy instantly looked down at the floor. Now that the time had come, Remy wasn’t even sure that he was ready for it. Despite himself, he nodded. “Oui, we can.”

He stood there for a few moments longer as neither of them moved. “Can I come in…?”

Remy met his eyes again and looked back into his room, then back to Logan. “If you wan’.”

Logan stepped inside and let Remy close the door, looking around the room. It was clean enough, or at least as dirty as Ororo would allow it to get. “I haven’t really seen you… at all.”

Remy shrugged. “He’s been here.”

“About what happened—”

“You don’ need to say anything, alrigh’?” He knew Rogue would probably slap him for this, but he couldn’t miss the chance to tell him what he thought Logan wanted to hear. “Remy knows he screwed up. He made a mistake. He shouldn’t’ve done what he did. He’s sorry.”

“Just let me talk, okay?” When Remy was quiet, Logan nodded, more to himself. He needed to say this. “I won’t lie to you, Remy… you caught me by surprise. I never thought… I didn’t know you felt that way about me. And I reacted badly when… when it happened. I didn’t know what to do, and I’m sorry I did what I did, because I know I hurt you. You wouldn’t have avoided me for so long otherwise. But… I avoided you too. I’m here because I can’t take it without you anymore. It sounds stupid, and it probably is, but I hate how quiet it gets over at my place. It’s impossible not to notice that you’re gone. I knew I was always gonna need you, but I never knew just how much.”

Remy folded his arms and kept his gaze low, one hand clutching at his own shirt. He knew it was foolish to think that this was some revelation that Logan loved him in return. “What’re you sayin’, Logan…?”

“I’m saying… I want you back.”

“After what Remy did?! Logan, dis wasn’ some accident o’ somet’ing! You jus’ gon’ fo’get dat!? Push it under de rug and be done wit’ it?!”

“Remy, please…” He let out a slow breath. “I want my friend back, okay? That’s all I want, my best friend.”

He finally met his gaze, his eyes slightly narrowed. “You know Remy don’ want dat.”

“I know… I really do, I swear. I know this isn’t what you want… It’s not fair to you, but do you think it’s fair to me either?”

“Logan, don’ make yo’self out to be de victim in dis one. You don’ understand a damn t’ing! When you pushed Remy back, it… it _hurt._ I ain’ sayin’ dis is yo’ fault. Remy kissed you wit’out givin’ you any sort o’ warnin’. You didn’ force Remy to feel dis way in de first place. Remy can’ help it. But you gotta know now dat t’ings’ll be different. Remy don’ know how, o’ in what ways, but dey will be. You’ll always remember what Remy did, and Remy ain’ ever gonna fo’get de look o’ horror you had when you pushed him away.”

Logan felt a pain surface in his heart. He knew he’d hurt Remy, but it had clearly tormented him this entire time. Had he really caused him to feel this much pain? He shook his head. “I didn’t know I’d hurt you so much…”

Remy shrugged, turning his body away somewhat. “Remy didn’ expect you to,” he said sharply under his breath.

“I don’t want to keep fighting. I won’t want us avoiding each other like this anymore! I hate it, and I know you hate it too. If you really wanted me to stay away, you would’ve punched me the moment you saw me standing in your doorway.” Remy cracked a small, yet still visible smile at that, and it gave Logan a little hope. “I’m not saying we should forget it happened… it would never work, and it’d probably only make things worse. I’m just asking for us to go back to how things were before this… hanging out, getting food after school, playing video games until one in the morning… being _friends._ ”

Remy looked back at him, his expressions having softened considerably. Remy was thinking about it, and it was making Logan desperate to convince him.

“Just… please, Rem.” He stepped closer and around him, facing him directly. “I miss you.”

It was more than enough for him. Relenting, Remy let his arms slowly drop to his sides and he sighed, his eyes never breaking contact with Logan’s. “… Alrigh’, Logan. We can do dat. Be friends.”

Relief flooded through him, and without thinking, he took Remy in his arms and hugged him tight, burying his face in his shoulder, nearly in the crook of his neck. He felt Remy’s arms come around him as well, tentative at first, but they tightened within moments. What started as a hug somehow turned into holding one another, and Logan didn’t allow himself to think about what it meant. It wasn’t just an embrace, it was something more. They both knew it, but they both refused to acknowledge it.

Finally, Logan loosened his hold, Remy doing the same almost simultaneously. They pulled back slowly and Logan looked into Remy’s eyes, not noticing how close they were. It reminded him of how Remy looked before they’d kissed… nothing short of beautiful.

The moment that thought crossed his mind, he stepped back maybe a bit too fast and cleared his throat. Remy didn’t seem to notice his quick retreat and smiled to himself sitting down on his bed. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, likely still in thought. For someone who talked so much, Remy always had a lot on my mind, Logan realized.

“Y’know… dis ain’ gonna change how Remy feels… you know dat, righ’?”

Logan nodded. He wouldn’t expect Remy to suddenly get over his feelings for him just because Logan had turned him down. “I know. I just hope someone can make you happy… happier than you think I could make you.”

Remy laughed through his nose; it sounded bitter, like Logan was kidding himself. “Fo’ de sake o’ us bot’, Remy hopes so too.” As it would be foolish to think Logan would suddenly love him after he’d kissed him, it would also be foolish to believe that anyone in the world could make him as happy as Logan did.

It wasn’t the best answer, but Logan was going to have to take it. Standing awkwardly in his room now, he cleared his throat again, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Did you… want to stop by, maybe? I’ve got some leftover food, we could probably find something to do…”

Remy smiled and stood again, but his expression was apologetic. “Maybe… anot’er time.”

It was a blow, and it hurt. “Oh… okay, that’s fine.” He dug his hands deeper, feeling even more uncomfortable.

“… But, Remy’ll see you at practice tomorrow.”

Logan blinked. “You will?”

“Oui. Remy’s got loads o’ assignments to catch up on… He can kill a few hours dere instead o’ sittin’ in here fo’ de rest o’ his life.”

Logan grinned. It was definitely something. “Good. I’ll see you there.”

“You will.” Remy gave him a smile and finally stepped around him, opening the door. Logan walked out but stopped by the door. Something didn’t feel right… he felt like he was forgetting something, or that he hadn’t done everything he needed to do. Not sure what it was, he gave Remy a brief smile and waved, quickly putting his hand back in his pocket. “Seeya, Remy.”

“Seeya, Logan,” he said, and closed the door. Logan stood there for a few moments, feeling a strange sense of detachment… he missed Remy already.

Shaking the feeling off, he walked down the hall and out into the main room, catching a glimpse of Ororo in the kitchen. Logan offered her a smile, and she smiled in return, knowing he had made things better for Remy, and in turn, her as well. Opening the door and letting himself out, he walked back to his truck and headed back home, not wasting much time before he went to his bed and fell asleep, faster than he had in a week and a half.

He knew Remy felt that Logan was all he had, but it turned out that Remy was all Logan had, too. He needed Remy in his life just as much. Perhaps even more.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it’s been a long, long time. The fic has been on the back burner for quite a while, as you’ve noticed. School (which is almost over) has been my priority. I’ve taken interest in some other things as well, which made starting up the chapter difficult. However, once I got into it, I managed to get it done. 
> 
> This is mostly devoted to homesweethomicide13, whose birthday is today <3 I can only hope this was worth the wait for all of you.

“Yo’ll be fine.”

“I think I’m gonna be sick…”

“You’ve been on dat roller coaster dat comes ‘round every summer, non? You survived dat, you’ll survive dis.”

“I’m gonna throw up.”

“If you wanna pull over, Remy t’inks we’ve got a few minutes to spare.”

Logan glared at Remy from his side of the car and Remy sent back a grin.

“You’re an ass.”

“Remy’ll never fo’get it, since it’s what you tell him every day o’ his life.”

Logan breathed in deep, the nerves still building in his stomach. Maybe it was the game. Maybe it was Remy’s skinny jean-clad legs resting on his dash. Logan turned his eyes back to the road, swallowing thickly. The game was freaking him out – it was state, what else was he supposed to feel? – but so was everything else. Remy’s feelings for him, his senior year nearly over, the college getting back to him and saying yes, he was accepted, and he’d have until mid-August until he started classes.

And now, he had to play his damn best for the entire school and the state. Or else.

Logan felt bile rise in his throat again.

“Hey,” Remy reached over and rested a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. He didn’t make the touch too intimate; his hold was somewhat rough, more on his arm than his actual shoulder. “Yo’ gonna get t’rough dis. You ain’ gonna die. Well, mos’ likely.” He smirked and slapped his hand on his shoulder before pulling it back. It was camaraderie, it was friendly.

It bothered the both of them like hell.

Logan pulled up to the stadium; people were walking from their cars and filing inside. Logan knew there were going to be a lot of people, but not this many. It somehow hit him again, and he cut the engine, folding his arms on the steering wheel and letting out a deep groan. Never before had he not wanted to play football so much in his life.

“Dey’re gonna be waitin’ fo’ you, Logan,” Remy said, unbuckling his seat belt. Logan made a noise of acknowledgement, but nothing beyond that.

Remy, knowing full well how nervous Logan was, gave him a moment. He watched him, let his eyes wander more than they should have, and finally looked out from the windshield. The game wasn’t going to start for another hour, but Logan had to warm up, he had to meet with his team and get ready. It was now or never, really. “C’mon,” Remy started again, reaching a hand over and clapping his back twice before opening the door and sliding out of the truck. Logan’s muscles tensed (it felt wrong, _so_ wrong) and he peeked out from the crook of his elbow, but Remy was gone. He sat up and looked back where Remy was heaving his bag from the bed of the truck. He rounded the back and opened Logan’s door, holding out his bag with all of his gear. “It’s one game. Ain’ not’in’ you haven’ done befo’.”

Logan turned his head and looked down at the bag, then at Remy, and back at the bag again. He resisted another sigh and took the bag, nodding silently. As soon as he was out of the truck, Remy closed both their doors and followed him to the locker rooms. The door was around the building, away from the family and friends of the players as well as other general fans of football. Logan had to keep his grip tight on the bag, otherwise it would fall right out of his shaking hand. Remy noticed all of it, every thick swallow and every ragged breath. He’d rarely seen Logan so scared; granted, the game _was_ a really big deal for him and for his team.

They stopped in front of the door and Remy looked around. There wasn’t a single person nearby. At least they could have a little privacy.

Logan took another deep breath. “Well, uh… I’ll see you after the game.”

Remy smiled. “You’ll be seein’ Remy in de stands. He’s yo’ cheerleader after all, non?” He asked teasingly, and Logan managed to crack a brief smile.

“Yeah… I dunno what I’d be without you jumpin’ around the stands.”

Remy laughed, looking down for moment as his fingers pulled idly at the hem of his shirt. “Don’ worry ‘bout de game, Logan. You’re gonna do great. An’ Remy ain’ sayin’ it jus’ because he’s supposed to o’ because it’ll make you feel better. He knows it.”

Logan nodded a little, leaning against the wall be the door. They still had a few more minutes. “I know… thanks.”

Remy shrugged. “It ain’ somet’in’ to t’ank Remy fo’.”

“Well, still. It’s important to me that you say that. And mean it.”

“O’ course he means it. Remy’s…. I’m honestly proud o’ you. Yo’ parents would be too. Dey are, really.”

Logan’s smile faded a little, and he swore he could feel his chest tightening a bit. He bit the inside of his cheek for a moment, keeping his emotions in check. He let out a single, soft laugh; just to keep his composure in control. “Yeah?” He looked up at the sky; it was nearly dusk, but there was still some light in the sky. Logan ignored the tears that gathered in his eyes briefly. “I think you’re right…”

Remy watched him, knowing that as hard as he tried, Logan couldn’t hide how he felt from Remy. He kept quiet and let Logan think on it for a minute or so. Just standing there together, content, was good enough for them.

It couldn’t last forever, though. “I, uh…” Logan sniffed once, looking out towards the empty space beside them. Anything to keep from meeting Remy’s eyes. “I should get going.”

Remy nodded, licking his lips idly. “Oui, you should.”

Logan hefted his bag over his shoulder and pushed himself from the wall. Remy did the same. “Seeya.”

Remy nodded and Logan took a step around him, reaching out for the door before Remy said, “Wait.”

Logan stopped and Remy stepped closer, and Logan felt his breath catch in his throat. “Don’ overt’ink it,” Remy said firmly, “don’ do anyt’in’.” And if Logan had a question, it was silenced by the kiss Remy placed on his cheek, one hand delicately wrapped around the base of his neck as he firmly pressed his lips against his skin. Logan was frozen, and when Remy pulled away, he didn’t know what on earth to do. Luckily, as usual, Remy took care of that for him. “Remy don’ need to wish you good luck. Jus’ kick ass out dere.” And with that he had turned on his heel and was gone in a heartbeat.

Maybe it was a mistake. He surely didn’t regret it.

And as Logan stood outside the locker room, having fallen against the wall and stared up at the sky above him, a part of him knew he was glad that Remy had done it.

\----------

The game went along a lot better than Logan thought it would have. They never had a large lead, but it was a steady match, and Logan would always be proud to call them their competitors. They put up a good fight, but the years of training his team had gone through together brought them to this moment, and they won. The clock ran out and everyone cheered, Logan’s team cheered, they hugged and held each other and soon people were racing out onto the field. Logan had never in his life felt more alive. Coaches, friends, _everyone_ was on the field, and when they swarmed out, he took their pats on the back and their hugs, laughing and grinning the entire time.

Still, he looked around, mind set on finding Remy. He’d been right – of course he’d been right, when was Remy ever _wrong? –_ and he wanted to thank him, tell him that he’d been right, _something._ He pushed through the people and called for him, looking around. He’d nearly shouted asking where the fuck he was before he felt a part of arms wrap around his neck and shoulders from the side. Logan laughed as he was tugged aside and Remy nearly tripped, being pushed aside by the excitable crowd around them. He looked down at Logan with the widest grin he’d ever had, and Logan gave them each a little space before facing him properly and hugging him as tight as he could. Amongst all the shouting and cheering, he could hear Remy saying something like “yo’ gonna break poor Remy’s spine!” and Logan laughed and held him tighter.

And without thinking about anything, he pulled back, cupped Remy’s face in his hands, and kissed him like it was the last thing he’d ever do.

\----------

The ride back home was quiet. Logan could swear he was red the entire way back, and even after the quick shower he’d taken in the locker rooms, it wasn’t enough to get his mind off of things. Hell, it made things worse.

Remy kept his hand pressed against his own mouth, not having said a single word ever since Logan had kissed him. His mind was at work the entire time, wondering what it meant if it meant anything at all. It had to have been a mistake, a spur of the moment… it wasn’t what Remy wanted.

Logan opened his mouth once or twice to say something, but it felt too awkward, or it sounded like he was trying too hard, and so he just gave up.

Remy was admittedly glad for the silence. When they pulled up to his place, Logan parked and kept his eyes ahead, though they fell to the steering wheel after a moment. He was ashamed, he was embarrassed. He also felt guilty, because he had no doubt in his mind that after rejecting Remy like he did, a kiss like that was only crossing his own word.

"Remy’ll see you Monday, Logan,” Remy said simply and opened the door to get out.

“Remy, wait—”

“Remy understands. You were… excited. Had every right t’ be. It was an accident, Remy’s sure.” He got out and shut the door behind him, and Logan watched as he walked back inside.  He let out a long sigh, letting his head fall back against the headrest. _That wasn’t what I was going to say._

He drove away from Remy’s place and headed home; any ounce of celebration was lost the moment he had kissed Remy.

\----------

When school eventually did come around, Remy had acted like nothing happened. He was smiled and laughter, even if it was a little less than before. People were still congratulating Logan on the win. If anyone had seen what Logan did to Remy, they either hadn’t seen or pretended that it hadn’t happened. Logan wasn’t entirely sure why, but he wasn’t exactly thinking of questioning it. With the game behind him, all he had to worry about was graduating and getting to college.

There was that, as well as his stirring feelings for Remy. He knew Remy believed that Logan’s feelings wouldn’t change when he’d first kissed him. He’d been right, or so he thought. Ever since Remy had kissed him, he noticed more things about him, found his fondness for the small quirks Remy had never failed to make him happy or make him smile. He liked the way he dressed, he like the way he talked. He liked how he pushed his hair back when he was writing something down, and when he wrote, Logan watched his hand and noticed just how long his fingers actually were. The ideas that followed made a flush creep up his neck and he quickly buried himself in his book again to refocus.

It was becoming a problem, and he had no idea who to go to. If he was beginning to feel something for Remy, he didn’t want to confide in someone who would tell Remy. He wanted to tell him himself if something came of it. If something was to be done, it would be done right and it would be done his way.

He felt a shiver travel up his spine. It was beginning to sound like he was already planning to tell Remy something.

Logan spent the week putting on smiles for people, especially for Remy. As they both walked on the line of pretending nothing was happening when something absolutely _was,_ he felt the need to hide becoming more and more overbearing. He made excuses when he watched Remy for too long. He let people bump into him in the hallways so he could feel Remy’s arm against his own. It was becoming juvenile, but Logan found that he didn’t quite care anymore. He knew he was giving in, slowly but surely.

It seemed so strange; not long ago, he never thought about Remy like this. Well… he supposed there were some times he wondered, perhaps knowingly let his gaze linger. But he never thought about Remy like that. But even Jean had accused him of possibly having some interest in Remy. Was it really that obvious? He’d never really dated someone before Jean, so he didn’t know how people who dated acted around one another. Thinking back, what he’d done with Jean (well, besides _certain_ aspects of the relationship) were no different to how he was around Remy. In many ways, he was closer to Remy. Not to mention, Remy was far more tolerable than she was.

Logan, forcing the thoughts out of his head, sighed. He was too uncertain. He didn’t know what he wanted. He didn’t know if he wanted Remy as a friend or something more. If he tried to go farther with Remy, then realize he was wrong about how he felt, he would never forgive himself. The last thing he would ever want to do is bring more torture to Remy. God knows he’s been through enough already.

It’s why he planned to ignore it. He’d ignore how his heart would race when Remy smiled or laughed. He’d ignore the joy it brought him to have Remy come over to his place again and make himself at home on his couch. He’d ignore the deeply-buried urge to kiss Remy’s forehead when he fell asleep. In the back of his mind, Logan knew this was all wrong, and he knew that if he felt something, he should act on it. But the more present fear – not of being wrong, but of hurting Remy – was the only thing that stopped him.

\--------

School is, much to Logan’s surprise, nearly over. There’s just over a week left, and some of the students have stopped coming altogether. Not like it’s a big deal. At this point, the teachers hardly care and want the year to be over as much as anyone else.

Remy came into the classroom, not even bothering with a bag to carry books anymore. He pulled out a chair and dragged it beside Logan, sitting himself down and propping his feet on the desk in front of him. Again, Logan noticed how well his legs were defined in the jeans he wore, but he shook the thought out of his head.

“Remy hopes you know yo’ de only reason he shows anymo’.”

Logan felt a smirk tug at his lips. “Yeah? And why’s that? Nothing to do at my place?”

“Non.” Remy states matter of factly. “Yo’ also almost outta food.”

“I’ll pick something up after school.”

“Or,” Remy begins, letting his head roll towards Logan. “We could jus’ get somet’in’ now.”

Logan frowned. “Now?”

“C’mon, Logan. He ain’ gon’ notice dat yo’ gone.”

Logan looked at the teacher behind his desk. No, he definitely wouldn’t.

“Just get some early lunch. Please?” He put on his best pout, and when Logan looked over at him, he immediately looked away and rolled his eyes.

“Don’t even.”

“But Logan…”

“No.”

“You won’ even give Remy a chance!”

“You just wanna skip.”

“An’ you don’?”

Logan couldn’t say he didn’t.

Remy grabbed Logan’s sleeve, tugging on it gently. “Le’s go. Now, before we’re stuck here all damn day.”

Logan looked at Remy, then the teacher, and finally sighed. “… _Fine._ But we’re coming back.”

“Sure, sure.”

“I mean it.”

Remy stood and adjusted his shirt a little. Logan hated how well-fitted it was. “Jus’ like you mean you ain’ skippin’ class, eh?”

Logan stood after him and sent a glare his way, to which Remy grinned. Without hesitation, he pulled them both into the hallway without saying a single word. It was really too easy; skipping was as easy as walking out the door and never looking back. It was a shame he was only starting when they had a week left of school.

Remy let himself into the truck and Logan drove. They went to a fast food place at Remy’s insistence (“You ain’ trainin’ to be a big NFL star fo’ a few mo’ mont’s, you can have a burger!”) and they walked inside, placing an order. Remy sat himself down at one of the tables and let Logan sit beside him in the booth. They were mostly quiet, Remy picking at a string on his shirt while Logan drummed lightly on the table. Another man walked in and placed an order, sitting nearby. Logan glanced at him for a moment, and he would have paid him no mind, but the way he looked at Remy… something inside Logan didn’t like it.

Logan shifted a little closer to Remy, something that caught his attention but he didn’t speak. Again, Logan let his gaze flicker to the guy at the table. His eyes were still on Remy. He hated how hungry they looked, how they practically drank in the sight of his best friend. If he had less self-control, he’d growl at the bastard. However, he hadn’t done anything (too) wrong, so he tried to ignore him.

“You got a name?”

Here we go.

Remy looked up, confused. “… You talkin’ to Remy?”

“Yeah,” the man said, and he gave a sick smile that made Logan shudder. “I think I’ve seen you around.”

“Oh, uh… probably. Remy’s been livin’ here since he was young.” He shrugged absently and looked towards the counter.

“Well, if you’ve got nowhere to go this weekend, there’s a party you can come to. It’ll be fun… it’s at my place.”

Logan froze, and he swore he felt Remy tense beside him. Straightening, Logan set his gaze on the man and sent the fiercest glare he could muster. When the guy still refused to acknowledge him, he spoke up. “Listen pal, we’re not interested.”

He finally looked at Logan, his smile all but gone. “I wasn’t askin’ you.”

Beneath the table, Remy’s hand had slipped to grab at Logan’s shirt. “Either way,” Logan said, his voice hard. “Not interested.”

 “I think the boy can speak for himself,” the man hissed.

“We’re, uh… we’re fine,” Remy said, his voice a little shaky. Logan let one hand subtly move to where Remy held tightly to his shirt. Remy let Logan take his hand, and he swallowed and kept his posture tall. “T’ank you. But we’re fine.”

“Not even for an hour or two?” He persisted, and Logan’s free hand clenched into a fist. “It’ll be a _real_ good time…” He licked his lips, yet again eyeing Remy like he was a piece of meat.

“He said _no,_ got it?” Logan said firmly, and right before the man could reply, their order was called. Logan pulled Remy out of the booth quickly and kept his directly against his side, grabbing the bag with a muttered “thanks” and walking out of the restaurant as fast as he could. He pulled out his keys and opened Remy’s door first, letting him in before getting into his own side. He started the car and pulled out of the lot. His hands were tight on the wheel and his gaze was set directly ahead. He checked his rear-view mirror the entire way back, just in case.

Silent beside him, Remy sank into his seat and kept an arm lightly wrapped around himself. He’d never felt so disgusted in his life, but he’d never seen Logan get so worked up like that before. He was protective, almost possessive, and the thought went through Remy’s mind over and over again.

“Where’re we goin’…?” Remy finally asked, hating how his voice wavered a little. He cleared his throat. He wasn’t some kicked puppy.

“Home.” Logan didn’t say anything else, and for Remy, that was the most comforting statement he could’ve heard.

They pulled up to Logan’s house and Remy grabbed the food, letting himself inside and kicking off his shoes. He considered sitting on the couch, but his feet carried him down the hall. He was sat in Logan’s bedroom likely before Logan even made it through the door, opening the bag and grabbing his burger and unwrapping it, his legs folded under him as he sat at the head of the bed, distracting himself with lunch. When Logan finally stood outside the bedroom, Remy met his gaze briefly before looking away. He wasn’t sure what to feel; all he knew was that he was safe now. That’s what mattered.

“You okay…?” He asked finally, still standing in the doorway.

Remy nodded. He was still shaken, but it would pass.

“I’d’ve kicked that guy’s ass.” He said it firmly, yet again protective. Remy looked at him again. “But I, uh… I don’t think starting something in a fast food place is gonna give me a good rep. With the college.”

Remy wondered why he sounded so unsure of himself then. “Don’ trouble yo’self. You don’ gotta be a shield o’ somethin’ fo’ Remy. He can handle himself.”

“Yeah, well—” Remy frowned a little, and this time Logan looked away. He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t tell Remy that he _wanted_ to be the one to protect him. “Yeah,” he said simply, unsure what it really meant, and finally walked into his room and grabbed the bag of food from Remy, joining him on the bed.

They ate in silence. By now, Remy was full of questions. His mind went back to the kiss at the game, and now today. He wanted to ask, desperately, but it still felt wrong. It felt like that would be taking a hammer to the thin ice he already walked on around Logan. The last thing he wanted to do was shatter their friendship for good.

“Did you, uh… wanna watch something?” Logan asked. Remy only shrugged.

“It’s up to you, Logan.”

He figured something was better than the silence in the room. He slid off the bed, grabbing the bag from the restaurant, and headed out to the living room. They could watch something in his bedroom on his TV. Grabbing one of Remy’s favorites, he walked back into the room and set up the DVD player, putting the disc in and letting it start. He caught sight of Remy’s small smile.

“You don’ get tired o’ Remy makin’ you watch dis all de time?”

Logan shrugged, smiling. “Nah,” he said. “It’s a good one.”

“One o’ Remy’s favorites… but Remy’s sure dat you knew dat already, non?”

“After sittin’ through you watching it fifty times, I got a hunch.” He lightly bumped his shoulder against Remy’s, and Remy grinned at him. The tension was finally lifting much to the relief of both of them. The movie went on quietly, and at some point halfway through, Remy shifted just a little closer to him. Near the end, Logan’s leg was lightly pressed against Remy’s. By pure accident, he told himself. As the credits began rolling, Remy was leaning on his shoulder, content to fall asleep right then. Logan was more than happy to let him.

“Did you wanna put in another movie…?” Logan asked as the movie returned to the title screen, but one look at Remy showed him that he was fast asleep. Logan laughed softly, reaching for the remote and watching the special features while Remy slept.

\----------

Remy slept a lot longer than Logan expected. When one hour turned into two and then neared three, Logan knew he had to get up at some point. He’d watched every deleted scene, every behind the scenes piece of footage, and whatever else he could find on the disc to watch. He carefully pulled from under Remy and dug out another movie, bringing a second just in case. He put in an action movie and set the volume to low, but even the bright explosions and fast car chase scenes didn’t keep his attention.

He swore at this rate, Remy would sleep forever. Logan watched him breathe, slow and steady. He shifted a few times, his body slouching more against the headboard and his head resting on Logan’s shoulder. It didn’t look particularly comfortable, and Logan wondered if wrapping his arm around Remy would make it better somehow. At first, he rejected the thought; he couldn’t do that, he just _couldn’t…_

… but slowly, Logan slipped his arm around the small of Remy’s back, and Remy buried his face into his shoulder, smiling to himself. Logan smiled too, content to stay like that for as long as possible.

It wasn’t until the movie just ended that Remy woke up, groggy and half out of it. He nuzzled further into Logan’s shoulder (he swore he was dreaming; after all, they never quite had this type of closeness anymore) and smiled, breathing in deep. He felt an arm wrap tighter around him and focused on that, the safeness he felt, how absolutely at peace he was. Above him, he heard Logan mutter something, and without thinking, he spoke softly, “Mm…?”

He felt Logan tense beside him, and suddenly things felt a little too real. The arm around his waist was suddenly gone and the body he rested on started to pull away. He forced himself to open his eyes and wake up. Pushing himself away from Logan, he was eye to eye with him, and a blush rose to his cheeks. “Desole, Logan, Remy didn’… He didn’t realize how tired he was…”

Logan absently rubbed his shoulder, shrugging because frankly he had nothing else to say. “It’s fine…” He looked at the TV for some sort of distraction. “You slept for a while.”

Remy looked at the clock; he’d been asleep for at least four hours, if not a while more. It was nearly dinnertime by now.

“Have you been getting enough sleep?”

Remy blinked, surprised by the question. He acted as casual as he could manage. “Oui, sure…”

“ _Have_ you?”

Remy sighed. Of course he wasn’t.

“Why not?”

“Dere’s a lot on Remy’s mind, Logan. Figure you’d understand dat much.”

Logan didn’t want to dwell on the subject. “Did you want anything for dinner?”

Remy shrugged. “Don’ wanna be a burden.”

The words stung slightly. He never wanted Remy to feel like he was a burden to Logan. “You aren’t,” he said firmly. “C’mon. I’ll grab something outta the fridge.” He got out of the bed and went to the kitchen, leaving Remy behind for a moment as he remembered the arm around his waist. Slowly, he got out of bed and followed.

Logan was looking through what little he had in his fridge. Remy had been right; there was practically nothing. He had a frozen pizza in his freezer, but they’d just had that the other day. Logan wasn’t really in the mood for it. “Ah, shit…” he said, and Remy tilted his head. “I’ve got basically nothing. I mean, there’s pizza, but we just had that… and the only other thing isn’t enough for the both of us.”

Remy shrugged. “Y’know, it’s fine. Remy can go home an’ get his own dinner. ‘Ro’s probably got somet’in’ he can eat. She keeps offerin’, but you usually get Remy food. An’ don’ t’ink Remy’s tryin’ to guilt ya,” he added quickly. “She’ll probably be mo’ dan happy to feed Remy fo’ once.”

Logan huffed out a small laugh. “Yeah, maybe…”

Remy’s fingers drummed against the table. “Remy’ll get outta yo’ hair.” Logan closed the fridge and he watched him, watched him run a hand through his messy hair and tug on his shirt, then he was turned around and walking towards the door. The urge to stop him and make him stay was growing more and more every second. Still, Logan grabbed his keys and stood by Remy, who was pulling on his shoes. “Oh, and uh,” he started it slowly, somewhat awkwardly, “sorry about…”

“Don’t.” Logan meant it.

Remy smiled briefly. “An’… t’anks. Fo’ earlier. You didn’t have to.”

He nodded. “I did.”

“Logan—”

“No, I did. That guy wasn’t gonna say that to you and get away with it. I’m not gonna let something like that just happen to you and not do anything about it.”

It was a borderline confession, and Remy seemed to realize it too. He was clearly trying not to think of it that way; he laughed and shrugged, rolling his eyes. “Tryin’ to be Remy’s knight in shinin’ armor?”

Logan didn’t follow along with the joke Remy tried to make it out to be. “No. I just wanna make sure nothing bad ever happens to you again.”

Remy’s smile faded a bit and his heart started to pound.

“Listen,” he started, “at the game—”

“It was an accident—”

“No, it wasn’t. It wasn’t an accident. I meant it.”

Remy suddenly seemed very close to tears, and Logan’s chest immediately flooded with guilt. He hadn’t meant for that, he just need to say it because God only knew that he’d regret never saying it to Remy for the rest of his life. “Logan… Don’… please don’ say dis…”

“I’m not saying this because I think it’s what you wanna hear. Hell, Remy, I don’t know if this is the right thing to say. I don’t know at all. It’s scary as all hell.” He took a breath, wondering if Remy had anything to say. When he didn’t speak, Logan kept going. “I may not know what I’m doing. Okay, no, I definitely don’t know what I’m doing. I’m not sure of all of this, but what I am sure of is that I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. I like _this,_ I like being with you and having you by my side all the time because it feels right and it always has, and…” His shoulders slouched. “I’m not really good at saying this… but what I’m trying to say is…”

Remy, for the first time in a long _long_ time – before the kiss at the game, before Remy kissed Logan, before he got together with Jean – smiled. It was so fond, so loving, and Lgoan lost track of what he was trying to say. Without having to say it and without Remy needing to ask, he stepped forward and cupped Logan’s face in both of his hands, leaning down and kissing Logan directly against his lips. He froze briefly when Logan’s hands came up to his shoulders, but they gripped Remy tightly, pulled him closer just a little, and they quickly melted against each other.

It was over too soon for the both of them. Regardless, they both left the kiss breathless, and Remy gave them each a little space, though his fingers were still tangled in Logan’s hair.

“I wanna try,” Logan said finally, and Remy’s eyes closed briefly, a grin gracing his slightly-reddened lips.

“Am I dreamin’…?” He asked, and Logan shook his head, tugging on the sleeves of his shirt slightly.

“No, you’re not,” he murmured, and leaned up to kiss him again.


End file.
